Chapter 2: The Discovery

My name is Kota Marxx and I am 20 years old. I'm 5 feet and 9 inches, I weigh 140 pounds, and I don't have much muscle mass on me. I'm mixed race with Caucasian and Hispanic ethnicity. I'm a homosexual and my mother accepts my sexual orientation. Currently, I'm going to community college to get basics out of the way and eventually get my Master's degree in Psychology. I am very intrigued with the mind and behavior of human beings especially... someone like myself.

I am a masochist and I mostly enjoy feeling sexual pain. I found out when I was 15 years old while I was looking at porn sites with my buddy back in high school. The web site he pulled up showed a thumbnail of a woman who was tied up with rope, wearing a blindfold, and had a rubber ball in her mouth. When I saw it I felt like a lightening bolt shot through my whole body. I asked my friend to stop scrolling and to click on the video.

The video showed the woman on her knees and she was trying to moan and scream but it came out as only loud muffles. Her hands were tied behind her sweaty trembling back as a man plowed her from behind. As I kept watching I started to feel anxious. The man in the video suddenly slapped her ass so hard that you can almost feel it. The woman groaned in pain and at that point I felt like I couldn't breath. Looking at this defenseless woman who was undergoing different types of emotions all at once fascinated me.

I want to know how that feels like.

My friend clicked out of the video and suddenly I forgot where I was for a second. My friend said, "I'm not really into BDSM." I looked at him for a moment and then back at the screen while I tried to register what just happened. As soon as I got home, I took to the internet for more research about BDSM.

After researching for a whole week, I started to purchase a bunch of different sex toys. I also started to read and practice tying different knots. I even dived into autoerotic asphyxiation and almost killed myself twice. Even though I explored the world of BDSM for a couple of months now and incorporated them in my masturbation sessions I never had a chance to find someone to do those things with. I'm still a virgin and I only came out recently. And if I'm going to lose my virginity then I want to make sure everything is absolutely perfect.

I want to know what ecstasy is.

I don't have time to be looking for a relationship and hoping my partner will be into it. It will be rare to find someone like that. So I have decided to hire an escort who delivers those specific services but I've been searching for several months now and can't seem to find the perfect one. Eventually, I told my secret to my best friend, Mallory, hoping she would be able to help me. She thought I had a strange fetish and goal but shrugged it off and offered her help. But even with her help it's still been tough... that is... until she discovered the dark web.

I'm so close I can almost taste it.