20. Chapter 20: Harry

Hello, everyone! Wow, over 470 reviews. :D I never expected so many! Thank you, everyone! A reply for some reviewers are at the end of this chapter (that's why it's so huge).

& first, let's get on with...

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10 Ways to Kill Draco Malfoy

Chapter 20

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HARRY

OK. Take a deep breath, Potter. Calm down. You know you're not that angry at Blaise. You know you aren't. Whooooooooooo. Whaaaaaaaaaaaah. It's OK. Everything's fine. Ginny's alright. Nothing has happened. Come on. You know you can forgive that slimy little git.

Oops. Let's not get too insulting, shall we? Let's... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

STUPID FARKING SLYTHERIN! STUPID ZABINI! STUPID BISEXUAL IDIOT! STUPID FREAK! STUPID FERRET, who dared him to kiss Ginny! ARGH! Damn them all! I HOPE THEY GO TO HELL! I HOPE THEY BURN ON A STICK UNTIL THEY SHRIVEL UP, AND THEN BE EATEN BY VULTURES! GAH!

Phew. That was good. Now I feel a little better.

"Um, Harry...? Are you feeling alright?" Hermione asks me worriedly. I realize I have been beating the nearest wall with my chair. Madam Rosmerta glares at me, staring at the splinters that are all that's left of what used to be a wooden chair. "I mean, you've been beating at that wall for the last ten minutes... Eek!" She ducks as I swing the chair to put it back beside the table.

I glance at her oddly. "What's wrong, Hermione? Why are you ducking?"

She breathes out and gives me a shaky smile. "N-nothing, Harry! I'm fine. How about you?"

Ron is already talking to Madam Rosmerta to try and convince her not to punish me to severely about the chair. After a few moments he comes back, beaming. "OK, Harry! She says that she won't raise a fuss about this incident, as long as you pay the full amount of money to buy a new chair. Madam Rosmerta says it costs 20 galleons for the chair. Pay her as soon as possible and she'll let you off the hook."

"Oh. Thanks, Ron. I appreciate it." I smack him on the back, perhaps a bit too cheerfully, because he makes a strangled noise and staggers off to join Hermione. I look at the pile of wood at my feet. Several customers nearby have already rushed out the door in fright, and the ones who don't want to move, but are still afraid, stare at me cautiously, ready to duck if anything flies towards them. "Hey... where did Ginny go?"

Hermione looks uncomfortable. "Well, she told us that she was too guilty to face you, so she went back to Hogwarts alone. I mean, what Blaise did was pretty mind-scarring... especially since it's Blaise and all."

Disappointment clouds my features. "Oh." I try to give a feeble smile and change the subject. "So... what should I do with these, Hermione? Take them back to Hogwarts and use them for the fire in the common room?"

Hermione shrugs, glancing at me. "I don't think that fire uses wood, but if you feel like it you can keep them..."

I shake my head. "No, I'd rather not, but it's a mess sitting here, isn't it? Someone might trip and kill themselves."

"Er, alright then. This is more practical." Hermione whips out her wand and points it at the timber, moving the broken chair with her foot so that nothing else can catch fire from it. "Pyrifico!" The wood instantly catches flame and starts burning very fast. A few minutes later, all that is left of the chair is a few specks of ash. Ron kicks it away into a corner, and immediately a maid appears to sweep it up.

"Shall we go?" Ron asks. I nod, and the three of us head out the door, but not before Rosmerta calls me in.

"Mr Potter! Can I have a word with you, please?"

I sigh, but oblige and head back into the warmness of the bar. "Yes, Madam Rosmerta?"

"The chair?" She raises an eyebrow. "I understand Mr Weasley told you about the costs?"

"He has," I say politely. "I am aware of the fact that I need to pay you 20 galleons as soon as possible. Is that right?"

Madam Rosmerta nods, and smiles at another customer that has just come in. "What would you like, Mr Barnes?" To me she says, "Before the next term starts, if possible. It'll give you time to visit Gringotts to take out the money. I trust that you will be prompt with the payment."

"Of course," I reply. "Now if that's all..."

"One last thing," she says, beckoning me back. "Please, Mr Potter, do not smash anymore chairs in the future, or perform anymore dangerous or violent actions in my bar. Today we've already had a public kissing session -" - I feel anger rising again at these words - "- and very nearly, a fistfight. Plus your wall-beating - I've lost many customers today, Mr Potter. Please don't make me lose anymore customers, or there won't be a Three Broomsticks in the future." She smiles at me in what I suppose is meant to be a sympathetic way. "If you have any troubles you know you can talk to any of your Professors - they'll be willing to help you."

I shudder as I imagine a counselling session with Snape:

"Professor! I'm feeling depressed and angry."

"Go away, Potter, before I turn you into a pickled slug. Your personal problems are not my business. Go jump into the lake if you're depressed. God knows it'll brighten up the school."

"WAHHHHH! Professor, you're being mean to me! I hate you!"

"Yes, yes, whatever, Potter. Stop whining, you already whimper and complain enough to drive most people up the wall. It's amazing how your little friends haven't jumped off the North Tower yet."

"Well, they have considered it..."

"There you go. You might as well lead by example. Goodbye, Potter, before I blast you away with an exploding spell. I assure you it will not be a pleasant experience for you and your behind."

"But..."

"No buts, any more noise from you and I will take away so many points that you'd win the house cup if we counted how many negative points you have."

Er, am I the only one who sees a problem with that scenario?

"Alright, Madam." Finally, I head out the door to join my friends. Urgh. What a long talk about nothing.

"What did she say?" Ron asks. "Not the money again, I hope. I told her I'd tell you."

Hermione shakes her head. "Hah! No offence, Ron - I know you used to have a little crush on her, back when you had a crush on nearly every girl - but she's kind of greedy, don't you think?"

Ron blushes furiously. "I did not use to like Madam Rosmerta! I mean, come on, she's been alive since my parents have been alive! How old is that!"

I shudder. "Very old. I remember when she talked to some teachers and Fudge about my dad when they were in Hogwarts... seems like she was working at Three Broomsticks back then too."

The three of us shudder simultaneously. It would have been a very odd sight for a passer-by, but thankfully there is no one in our immediate vicinity.

Back at the Gryffindor common room, I spot a shadow of a redhead sprinting up the Girls Dormitory stairs. "Ginny...?" I drop all my things and run after the disappearing figure up the stairs. Sadly, the no-boys magic works at that moment and the stairs turn into an obscenely smooth surface. I try to hold on but only succeed in making squeaky noises as I slide pathetically down the new ramp. Somewhere up there, someone giggles, but stops quickly. "Ginny, is that you?"

She moves out of the shadows and comes forward. Her face looks a bit stupified but other than that, normal. "Harry? Um... I'm so sorry about that... I promise, I didn't take part in any of their plans!"

I shake my head. "Don't worry. I did hear the part where Malfoy gloated about how he dared Zabini to snog you, and so he did. It's not your fault. Only Malfoy's."

Ginny looks very relieved. "Oh, thank God. I thought you were coming up here to get me."

"I'd never do something like that!" I say, a little offended that she thought I was so violent. I mean, OK, I admit it, I do get a tad angry sometimes, but really, it's not like I do anything out of the ordinary except mope around and shout a bit.

Oh, and blow people up like balloons.

And, um, occasionally casting a lot of random hexes.

Er, also, I tend to smash things a lot...

OK, forget what I said about being offended. I suppose Ginny is right. I am a bit temperamental sometimes. But I'm getting better, I swear! After all, now it's inanimate objects that I'm hitting and swearing at and hexing, not the unlucky aunt or enemy. Though I still wouldn't mind hexing Malfoy every now and then. And now Blaise Zabini too.

"Yeah, well... want to go outside and talk, Harry?" She leans out shyly from the doorway. I nod, staring up at her like Romeo at Juliet.

Ahhh, that reminds me. I wish we were Romeo and Juliet. I mean, look at their undying love for each other! Even though they're from different families that hate each other (well, my parents didn't hate Ginny's, but we are pretty different in terms of fame) they still loved the other. The only thing is that I don't want to suicide because I think Ginny's dead. And hopefully she won't suicide because I suicided because I thought she suicided.

Oh man, my head hurts from thinking so much. It's spinning. I'm bound to get a headache soon. "OK. I don't know if you'll have to slide down or what..." I point at the still-smooth surface of the once-was stairs, grinning sheepishly at her.

"Don't worry about that, Harry," she laughs. "Watch this. It only turns into a ramp when a male is nearby. When a female walks down or up from it, it'll turn to stairs again." She runs towards the ramp. I half-expect her to fall down, and shut my eyes. Seconds later, she crashes into me and we land in a tangled heap on the carpet.

Blushing crimson, Ginny quickly untangles herself and stands up. "Uh... I don't know what happened there. Maybe it was because you were there too. Looks like the ramp stays a ramp if a boy is standing anywhere near it." She grins at me. "Sorry about that, Harry. Are you hurt?" I groan as I pick myself up and nod slowly, nearly screeching as something snaps in my neck.

Hermione and Ron have long left us to talk, and my bag is left on an armchair. "Wait a sec," I say, and rush to fling my bag into my dormitory. There is quite a lot of money in there. I don't want to lose anymore, especially since last year I tipped a whole bag of money into the fountain, and the year before I gave the twins my winnings... which left me with still a fortune, but noticibly smaller than before. When I come back, Ginny is waiting at my stairs. Somehow girls can enter the boys' dormitories, but boys can't enter girls'. God. Can't we men have any privacy whatsoever?

We climb out of the portrait-hole and walk out the front door of the castle. Outside, the birds are chirping and the sun is shining again, which is marginally better than the cloudiness we had earlier. "Soo... how was it?"

She glances at me questionally as we sit down beside the lake. This is my favorite spot - I don't know Ginny's favorite spot, so mine will have to do. "How was what?"

I snort. "The kiss, of course! What else?"

"Oh, Harry! Stop being silly," she says, wiping her mouth unconsciously. "You know it was horrible. I mean, this is Blaise we're talking about here."

"You didn't seem to hate it that much," I say pointedly, and the realize how jealous I sounded. But it's too late now. I'd already said it - and quite loudly, too.

Ginny stares at me, then bursts out giggling. "Aha! You're jealous, aren't you?" She giggles again. "That's so cute!"

"Wha-! I-I'm not! I mean, uh..." I bluster, trying to cover up my outburst.

She cups my face in her hands. I instantly turn a shade of red my uncle would have been proud of. "Don't worry, Harry," she whispers, leaning close. "I like you too."

At those words, all my worries and insecurities disappear. She likes me! She really does! And she admitted it. I didn't have to tell her first or anything. That always means that a girl really does like you. Or so Hermione tells me. "Ginny-"

"Shhh," she says, and closes her eyes.

Hands sweating, I put one on her waist - only to hear Ron's voice calling out. "HARRY! Where the bloody hell are you?"

Like lightning, we break apart just as Hermione and Ron appear from around the corner. Hermione sees our flushed faces and guesses immediately what has happened - or really, was going to happen. "Ron! They're there. I told you. Now let's get going."

Ron struggles against her, looking confused. "What were you doing? Why are you both so red?"

Hermione sighs. "Ron, you numbskull. Look what you've done." To us, she gives an apologetic look.

"What did I do? God, I just came to find you, and you blame me for it?" he grumbles. "I was just worried. I mean, they suddenly just disappeared..." I can see the clockworks in his brain ticking as his mind goes over his last sentence. "Hey... what were you two doing, anyway?"

"NOTHING!" I yell. Ron looks taken aback. "Oops. Sorry. Well, let's go, Ginny. We've fed enough to the squid," I say hastily, helping her up. She hangs on to my hand a second longer than needed, and I smile back at her.

"Man, people these days," I hear Ron muttering ahead of us. "Talk about ungrateful..."

Ron, I am going to kill you. Whoops - now I'm like Hermione. There's quite a list of people for me to kill, too... but I'll save revenge for later. Right now, I'm on the top of the world! Wheeee!

Oh gods, my head hurts from all that skipping. I'd better stop. People are pointing at me and staring. Uh oh.

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And Ron ruins their first kiss (nearly)... O.o

A list of thanks! (Replies are for people who reviewed chapter 19. Beware, quite a long list!)

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tru: Yup, most FFnet couples are either the original ones or weird ones. This is a weird couple. :D

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Whisper's Song: I already talked to you about the new fic, but in case you didn't get that email, I said I'd love to help. :D

DarknessHatesMe: It hates me too. I think. O.o

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Also thanks to:

BeautifulMisconception, anonymous, American Deer Hunter 73, Missy, trapped-in-a-dream, waterfaerie15, lilithofunderworld, Forgotten-Heart, FlairVerona, EvilsmileyfaceofDOOM, daichi, couch-potato01, jewelwhisperer, Bookworm1214, Sony, MysticStar7037, D/HR SHiPPER, Snake Misstress, CountryHermione, Sword in the Stone, kay345, spicygreensalad, Draco Malfoy, Hermy, Artemis, The Lady of the 4leafed Clover, Macey Muse, PhoenixPlume, stasha, Evie Malfoy, pink fluff, Michelle Felton, seamusismyprince, kamikazepanda, SomeOne, preciousonee, littlebozz, neear freeak, juliachan, AJ01, jOanna, Indian Ink, alygdgrl, TaKeFlIgHtDrAcOLuVr, LadyNymph, thedarkside45, Element Mage, gopha-gurl, Cataclysmic Silliness

Oops, I know I didn't actually get to where I got to in my last chapter, so you didn't get to read Harry's thoughts about the Howler, but there isn't much to say about it except he was thinking what Draco thought he was thinking.

And does anyone here actually keep their review alerts, instead of trashing them? O.o I hope I'm not the only one who makes a folder for them and keeps them, even though I can read them on my page...