Flashback (Cameron scene)

meeting character one

(Trigger warning

-involves mention of drug use, child abuse, rape etc.)

Cameron POV

It was silent. A little too silent. The sound of raindrops pick at the rooftop. This hell, I called home. Everything was so dark. Sad. Just like me. everything was broken in a scattered mess around me. Yet I never seemed to care.. odd. I heard my door open but my eyes never opened, why did everything feel so different.. Why do I wish I was grown up so soon.. Things. we're very different. I had never lived a normal childhood.

I felt a strong hand grip my arm. Yet once again. I kept my eyes closed, hiding from the truth. I'd always done that.. Nothing ever seemed to change. I was stuck in a loop. This happened. every single day. My eyes forced open. My lungs scream out in pain for me. The screaming and pleading never helped, so what was the point in doing it anyways. My throat shakes with every word I speak. How come I couldn't remember. I couldn't remember the good times.

The 'Good Times' were never real for me. My body was acheing and my back bruised from the night prior.. you may be asking why.. Why have I never told anybody?..

School wasn't important.. my father used me as a pawn. As easy cash.. A father is supposed to take care of his kids.. but.. not in this case.. My right wing was gone. gone forever.. as I was never getting that back... my innocence was taken. and my life was as well..

why was everything so. out of order.. why did this happen.. what did I do wrong?.. how can I fix this mess?... Am I the mess?

I feared. I was feared.. Basements terrified me.. as everything else did as well.. My best friend... my best friend's.. Alison.. and the little baby I called my own.. my sisters. my lifelines... my everything... my trust and love built up into innocent living beings..

I wanted them to keep their innocence... I needed them to trust, to love, to need, to want, to see, to laugh, to strive... to live... everything I wasn't able to do... I hope they could.. as death will visit me very soon, but until time comes... I will... I will learn.. I will learn to trust.. I'll learn to love... I'll learn to need... to want... to see... to laugh... to strive.. and most importantly... I'll learn..

I'll lean to live... I'll be happy... I'll strive and protect them with my life... I'll teach them my ways and allow them to make mistakes... I'll understand them... their needs, their wants.. I'll understand their love and teach myself to return it.. I never want any child to suffer how I have.. it hurts.. it's extremely painful... I want.. I want to live.. I need to live... I don't want to die...