Maybe a Debt Life

Facing the bedroom door, she pondered for a few seconds on how she would do that, but before she could knock to call the door, it opened by itself. Not expecting that to happen, Noella backed away, but after that she only saw in front of her that man with violet eyes sitting in a chair while reading a book. Soon he looked at her and opened a cynical smile when he saw her standing in the doorway and left the book on the desk beside him.

[He seems to already know that I would look for him…]

Almost sure of that, she decided to enter the room, closing the door, she faced him and the two looked at each other while waiting for one of the sides to start a conversation. Then his vision shifted from his eyes to her breasts staring back at them.

That look Noella received gave her a strange feeling, Kamaell wasn't looking at her in front of her exactly, but at her body. It wasn't a look that showed desire, but something that saw her as a shell.

— Why are you looking at me so much? Can't you even really look at me? — She asked to him irritated.

Though the look wasn't uncomfortable, Noella still saw his intent with unease, he wasn't really looking at her but at the lord she could become.

Realizing what he was doing, the half-breed looked into his eyes again and then began to look at himself.

— What's it? — Having no answer, Noella asked when she felt something strange.

— It's weird, you know. I don't feel my body the same before I die. My hands don't feel like mine, my body feels heavy and disproportionate to what I remember. My Authorities are no longer the same either, it's as if I were no longer the I I remember. — He replied, looking at his hands.

Noella had been irritated that he wasn't seeing her as a person, but after that she noticed something new. He wasn't seeing himself as anyone either.

— From what I understand so far, Prince Imperial, looking at how you acted today, you might not feel like you're alive again. You've talked about me before, about my wants, but what about you? It's okay that it's only been a few days since you returned to this world, but you...

Irritation made her want to rebut his earlier words.

— …you don't seem to have any will to live. Said I live holding on without showing what I really want, but you live now without even having something to hold on to. I wanna know, do you even know what you wanna do now? — She questioned him seriously.

He didn't answer her again while she waited, he simply rambled on with a cynical smile in front of her.

— Stop acting like a wounded dog afraid to trust people. — Noella said after making a drastic comparison about him.

He sighed heavily, Noella felt like she'd done something she shouldn't have and yet she didn't back down from what she said. Seeing despite it all that he didn't bring up any more answers she turned to leave, but before she could do so Noella felt her feet pinned to the floor.

When looking at his boots she noticed that black chains held his boots and with that she looked at him in question.

— The only thing... The only thing I want right now is to disappear to a faraway place where no one and nothing can find me and I guarantee I can do that... I can disappear from the world and make everyone forget that I once existed . — He replied.

He wasn't staring at her anymore, as he explained he clasped his hands together and was staring at the old wooden floor. Noella couldn't see her face covered by hair that was longer than her own, but she could feel this…

Bitterness.

Repudiation.

Denial.

It was a mixture of feelings passed to her through a path that she didn't even know where it existed and only one thing she could realize, this whole idea was something that deep down he didn't want to do at all.

— I have a memory of the abyss before I met you. I was dead... probably... It was like I was inside a bubble and I couldn't get out at all, I couldn't think, see, hear or feel anything either. The closest I can get is that this whole time I was already dead. — He explained further.

— And that led you to…? — Noella asked, trying not to mess with him too much now.

It ended up working, seeing her ask about this he undid those black chains that disappeared on the ground as if they had never existed.

It was getting good, she was finding things out about him and that could be useful.

— I was dead, but I couldn't die completely. I didn't feel anything, but just existed. I just existed in that moment without even knowing it and even now I don't know if I can consider myself alive yet. — He continued to ramble.

Noella noticed a curious point about what he was talking about.

— Although I think your experience cannot be imagined, that must not be what you want to tell me. Think… Kamaell. Think and… Don't get lost. Maybe you're still too confused, but don't lose sight of your goals. — Asked Noella trying to change his attention.

[Is he on the verge of going crazy?]

One thing she noticed at that moment was that if she let him go deeper into these issues it could be too dangerous for him, for herself and for everyone around her.

She didn't know what he wanted to do, probably as it turned out, neither did he.

[If he can't figure out what he wants then I can only make him think the opposite way to calm his mind. Maybe it works.]

— What don't you want now? — Questioned Noella coming to a conclusion of how she could help him.

Noella's whole objective at this point was to take him with her to the capital. Her strength would be needed if you take into account that Illye's escort would now consist of a few aura master guards, a Phase 3 Lord she barely knew by sight, Illye herself who was Phase 1 and lastly Noella who at the moment couldn't not even be considered one way or the other.

If the assassins returned, she doubted that alone would be enough.

According to what Cardinal Jord had secretly told them, in the time it took Kamaell to leave the Temple, Jord estimated that Kamaell was a Phase 4, the Lord of Vultures and of something related to darkness that he was still unaware of.

— I don't want to miss anything anymore. — Said he after managing to organize his 'wills'.

— Well, if you don't want to lose anything else, that means you still have something. What would that be? — Noella questioned.

After that time looking at the floor Kamaell finally looked at her again. His violet eyes gleamed slightly as they stared at Noella and yet they were lost in her expression.

— I don't even know if I still have anything. It's contradictory, I know, but I just feel it. — He replied as he got up.

Noella mulled over these possibilities for a while until she came up with something concrete. It was something obvious to her, it could be thought easily because she was someone who over the years used to be well informed by her master.

— My master once told me that the Blue King, the Lord of Beauty and Lust, is the only one of the Sins that can currently be encountered. He is always in Quaresma and is the leader of the Blue Council that makes the kingdom's decisions. The rest of them only hear stories from hundreds of years ago, so their whereabouts are questionable. — Said informing him something that could cause anticipation.

— Blue King, Quaresma... — He mused as he thought about the book he was reading before suddenly bursting out laughing.

Not expecting that reaction, Noella was surprised to believe she had said something wrong. Was your information wrong? She began to suspect even that.

— Oh sorry. It's just that I remembered something he said to me once. It was something like… "Beauty cannot be hidden forever". I bet everyone has their reason for disappearing, but with him it's just the opposite. Thank you for this information. — He explained.

It wasn't unique or secret information, likely that if he had read that book enough Kamaell would eventually figure it out because it had been basic information for centuries. This explained to Noella that he had either just started reading or wasn't paying attention to what he was reading.

— It's not something to hide because for us it's a natural thing to know, but for you it shouldn't be. If you don't know something, you can ask, being within my capacity I can try to answer you. — Noella asked about such a possibility.

She was implying that she could help him to come to terms with the current state of the world even if it was a little bit.

— I see, is this all to get me to help protect the little princess on the way to Aggron's capital? If so, I can admit you're trying really hard. — He said finding out her goals.

— How did you…

— The Lord of the Rivers said you're leaving early tomorrow, so you must have come here to confirm that I would go with you too and not just disappear in the middle of the night. I must say that I feel blessed by this conversation, but connecting the dots of what you want is totally clear to me. — He explained as he got up and approached her.

Noella, not expecting it, thought about backing toward the door for a moment but decided not to budge. If she backed off now what would he say of her attempts to bring him along? For reasons like that, she didn't back down.

He didn't advance more than two steps.

— You lost all Blue Aura so you must be unable to fight. Even more so with that left arm in this deplorable state where he can barely move it. I'm fair to myself, so to pay my debt for bringing me back, I'll seek to keep them safe until the capital. — He finally said.

With such a decision, Noella breathed a sigh of relief. She neither stated nor denied directly that she was looking for him to do this, so she decided to leave it implied in the conversation.

— And after this? Going after the Beauty Lord? — She asked curiously.

After all, the journey to the capital was only a journey that would take a couple of weeks by carriage.

— It's something I'll decide after I get there. A lot is still unclear to me. — He replied, going to the door and opening it.

Did that mean in a way that he wanted Noella out of the room? It wasn't hard to understand so she decided to leave.

— Go rest, you'll need it because it's probably going to be hard to sleep well for the next few days. I'll meet you when morning comes. — He said goodbye and closed the door.

Already outside the room, Noella felt that maybe all this had not been necessary.

[Despite that, it's best to make the intentions a little clearer. I really hope he's of help.]

Noella heard his footsteps retreat, likely gone to bed or back to his chair.

Even so, it wasn't him she was thinking about most. Some things about everything involving their return still didn't make sense.

If Noella has been unconscious for three days then why has no one come to them from Dellaria? There were several people who could fly in and arrive in the middle of that time. One day would probably be enough for, say, her master to arrive in this city.

It just said that if no one came it was because the king prevented them from coming in search of them. Something else was going on without the two of them knowing and because of that Noella needed support even if it was from an outsider.

After that she went back to her room because she needed to take the rest of the hours to rest. From the next day she could think about her Authority and also about her left arm as they had put some medicine in her arm that made her feel nothing coming from it now, but Noella figured that wouldn't last that long.