REMUS
[MINDFALL PARADIGM: THE WAR INSIDE]
Tulisan
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What I like most about the novel is that the storytelling has a very clear structure, even though there is the obvious goal to find her father the story has taken some interesting sideways so far, that fit the humorous tone of the story very well and keeps you reading, even if the search doesn't make progress that fast yet.
This type of book is not necessarily groundbreaking, but it is entertaining and easy to read, exactly what a light novel is supposed to. The MC is not just point-blank and characterless but has her own mind and a nice background story from what I've read so far. That makes also the interaction with the System very delightful to read. Keep it up
I just read until chapter four and I honestly love it. For two reasons: - I like this typical smalltown setting and it is used perfectly. The dark Secrets those young people have to hide remind me of super dark Times. It is interesting to see Charlie's and Joey's story intertwine. It's completely unpredictable at this point. - Charlie is sooooo well written. Your typical good son, only growing up with his emotionless father. ? (what happened to his mother btw I wanna know the detail ^^) He is some kind of libertine who loves aesthetic literature, is emotional but apparently an introvert, and just sees the grey and boring little world around him in the small town. One of the most relatable characters, I am a fan I would like to know if you know about James from the end of the fucking world because it is such a big similarity!
Author here, I don't want to use this review to give a 5-star rating for myself but rather to thank the people involved in the process of creating this book and honor their work. If you want to support this book as well you can or just want to discuss it or want to know more about it you can join our discord server or our wikia. https://discord.gg/tkVj4e5o https://mindfall-paradigm.fandom.com/wiki/Mindfall_Paradigm_Wiki
I also know this trend, but you have to keep in mind that the MC just woke up and has little to no knowledge about the world he finds himself in. With the experience he gains about the city and his own background he will pick sides and stand up for his motivations. (no spoilers^^) Realistic character development also means that the MC is not born with a certain attitude or mindset, but needs some time and reasons to develop them. I hope you understand that this can't be done in six chapters, so keep reading and I hope he will satisfy your preferences.
Your notes were really helpful. Since English is not my native language there might be some flaws here and there and I want to apologize for that. Also we don't have an editor yet so if you are interested in test reading, we can stay in contact via discord
thx for your help. i appreciate it a lot