LuciferVermillion
The author of The Impossible Fate That Leads To A God Of A New World. Also an engineer in reality where no one knows that I write. Have been trying to progress as many chapters as possible.
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LuciferVermillion9mthBalas Arsenalhole6ty9Ch 3 Chapter 1.2- LuciferVermillion1yrBalas MayDreamer
Still, big brother Bin is still better than Bin Ge, in my opinion...
"Too late... Bin Ge!!" Ling who was already in his arms said while giggling. - LuciferVermillion1yrBalas
Hmm... I totally did not see that. Hahaha
"Too late... Bin Ge!!" Ling who was already in his arms said while giggling. - LuciferVermillion1yrBalas MayDreamer
Very cringy, if you ask me.
"Too late... Bin Ge!!" Ling who was already in his arms said while giggling. - LuciferVermillion1yrBalas LuciferVermillion
So 哥, or Ge, actually means 'brother' in chinese. The worst part is, 哥, or Gē, had a second pronunciation. Other characters that sounds like this is either 歌 (song), 胳 (armpit), or 戈 (surname), where none of it sounds like a name. So as a person who knew chinese, it sounds like it's always saying 'brother'.
"Too late... Bin Ge!!" Ling who was already in his arms said while giggling. - LuciferVermillion1yrBalas
Erm, it's not actually about 'Bin' but it's the 'Ge' actually. If you want to write chinese names, better research what that actually means first.
"Too late... Bin Ge!!" Ling who was already in his arms said while giggling. - LuciferVermillion1yrBerkomentar
What are you trying to bring out here?
"Xian, take some rest." Ling said as he saw him moving towards his room. - LuciferVermillion1yrBerkomentar
And here's Ling again?
"Xian, take some rest." Ling said as he saw him moving towards his room. - LuciferVermillion1yrBerkomentar
Ok, here's Ling.
"It's done!" Ling said as he sat on the couch with a cat on his lap. - LuciferVermillion1yrBalas LuciferVermillion
I don't get what is 'his head low'. And is he feeling exhausted?
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On Chapter 2, suddenly, a person called Leon showed up. Who is Leon? That guy from Resident Evil 4? How does he looks like?
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I don't get what is almost touching the skies. What are you intending to tell here? Just how tall is the mountain? Did it touched the clouds already? What is the structure of the building? Castle? Skyscraper? Mansion? Tower? Is the building tall? Or was it just built on a mountain? Rephrase this.
Paragraf ini telah dihapus. - LuciferVermillion1yrBalas LuciferVermillionCh 12 Chapter-12
- LuciferVermillion1yrBerkomentarCh 12 Chapter-12
- LuciferVermillion1yrBerkomentar
as someone barehanded.
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Rewrite this.
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This sorry...?
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Rewrite this.
"...I don't know what people do in such a situation…but anyway let's start with the introduction. Hello, I am Xiao He‐Ling, turning 18 this year, and you?" Ling said as he forwarded his hand boy looked at Ling's eyes for some time before forwarding his hand but stopped midway, horror took over his pale face. - LuciferVermillion1yrBerkomentar
Bin Ge? As in? 斌哥？
"Too late... Bin Ge!!" Ling who was already in his arms said while giggling. - LuciferVermillion1yrBerkomentar
The bus conductor yelled at the boy who dozed off.
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