jesus_hernandez
membaca
3687
Membaca buku-buku
while the story in itself is alright you made a tragic mistake you put mystical elements in a world where you really don't need to do such things.as the story moves along you will find it hard to make a plot because there are no really important events that need a assassin's particular skill set it's a nice concept but not needed. also the progression of the show is kind of slow most people watched the big bang theory and are anxious for you to get to that part of the novel.
it's always vampires why can't y'all wish to be viltrumite, werewolves, elves, dwarfs, or literally anything else
look his powers are great however giving so many perspectives confuses the people and takes away from the main character also shield essentially killed his family him helping them is just depressing he could have become an antihero and opened up different paths for scenarios with other marvel characters also no random dude gets powers and just leaves it people want to see him build his powers and use them in creative ways to get ahead not be a lackey
the concept is intriguing but the character is written in a very dissatisfying way and is just essentially a prop for the story no actual training with his powers is very stupid and somehow gets over losing his only family like in one chapter it's a good origin for an antihero but this guy just becomes a plot device do not recommend
is this based in a specific world or not cause recently I have been on a game of thrones fiction binge and the concept of a system based on Minecraft in game of thrones setting sounds interesting
while it is an interesting concept I find that the author seems to be wary of deviating a bit to far from canon so the few chapters up is essentially inner monologue and the mc following the canon Harry's footsteps no asking the goblins about his accounts no buying extra books just essentially a bot hopefully it gets better
nnnnnnnnooooooooo why this was such a good story and well written there were a few small tweaks that could be done to make it better but overall this was a solid story with so much potential how could you kill it😭😭😭😭😭👻👻
bruh don't drop this story it is one of the best. mc is not a beta and has huge potential though I would stop giving him power and let him master all the powers he already has maybe evolve a few also if you do keep this story going cause I'm not sure if you are even going to read this but I would do two more chapters on his current age then skip to him leaving shield.
was good till he became a devil you made him into another beta mc and made him less relatable as a character not only that but sirius black was a freedom lover you tarnished his name by making him a slave to a girl that he was pretty much stronger than not only that he got beast soul a really dope magic that would go really well in this world with yokai and stuff but you then forgot about it and made the the cover picture have nothing to do with the story might as well put the cover pic as sona.