Dimas_Pratama
A man who got ambitions to be a full writer. Even got job in Hospitality.
Tulisan
membaca
99
Membaca buku-buku
This story is good. I read twice and already keep into my library. I hope that you continue to use simple grammar, because some of them didn't understand if you read first. But that's okay since you'll always improve no matter you got struggling in your writing. I hope you didn't give up early and focus on your own writing.
Nah. just been a while since i was silent reader and didn't give so much about review. and this is the first time i give review to someone in global (usually, i read a lot in indonesian language. and always give some feedback)
The quality of writing is good. Easy to read and make story interesting. At first, i thought gonna be overpowered. turns out i was wrong since mc needs effort from weak into strong. Also, pacing is good and worldbuilding needs to improve. But as reader, i like it. Keep it work
thanks for giving review honestly. actually, I made stories to focus on 4 main characters, and each character trying to build up into good development, to make character feels insecure when they got similar situation in real life. and yes, I made complex stories to make interesting and feel sympathy for character (though I admit, some of them kinda messy) anyway, thank you again[img=recommend]
speechless menurutku. baru kali ini, aku membaca cerita webnovel dengan kalimat dan kata yang kompleks tapi seru untuk dibaca. belum lagi teknik sihir atau baca mantra ala akademi, dipadukan dengan petualangan dan cerita berat, membuat kisah ini berasa real. dimulai dari worldbuildingnya begitu rapi hingga diksi simpel.
Untuk segi cerita disajikan sudah bagus. Penokohan karakter dapat. terutama Yuki karakter yang kuanggap sebagai lemah. Tapi perlahan-lahan mulai terkuak misterinya. Termasuk dia kembali ke masa lalu untuk perbaiki nasib. Gak mudah memang. Tapi disitulah ujian sesungguhnya Yuki dimulai. Salut dah dengan pembawaan unik antara thriller dan scifi Agak sayang dengan terganggunya banyak typo, tanda jeda dan baca belum diedit. Belum lagi penggunaan titik tiga (...) kurang tepat.
I like the character's style where the story is carried out in the form of mafia and contemporary romance. However, there are things to be aware of. Namely world building which is still not 100 percent solid. The quality of the writing has improved with each chapter. and Characterizations are presented very uniquely. And there are some elements of psychology, where there are words that have never been heard before. I hope in the future to continue to develop worldbuilding until it is strong. If there is an intention to make a spin off, prepare an outline and it needs to be redeveloped
Cerita yang disajikan benar-benar bagus. Bahkan kita selalu berpikir Zahra merupakan orang yang paling rapuh sejauh ini. Walau begitu, aku suka pengembangan karakter Zahra terbilang unik. Seolah-olah dia itu bersimpatik sekaligus sisi humanis belum pernah ada. Ada canda tawa, sedih, amarah, tabah dan sabar. Semua menjadi satu paket dalam cerita ini. Sayangnya, kualitas tulisan terbilang rata-rata. Penggunaan kata hubung agak mengganggu pembaca. Misalnya baik-lah. Padahal dalam baku, baiklah adalah kata benar. Jadi, ada baiknya pelajarari kata hubung secara umum dan pahami kata sambung seperti pun, di, ke, dari, dan lain-lain. Semoga penulis terus memperbaiki kualitasnya hingga ke depan. Semangat.
Ceritanya diusung bagus. terutama ada slight komedi yang bikin kita ketawa. Walau begitu, ada beberapa hal yang harus diperhatikan. Yaitu tata bahasa perlu perbaiki. Memang susunan kata bagus dan jarang typo. Tapi penempatan tanda baca seperti dialog tag masih amburadul. Saranku, pelajari tentang dialog tag. Serta buat konsep worldbuildingnya. Jujur, aku belum begitu ngeh dengan cerita transmigrasi kecuali harus baca dari awal
Ceritanya bagus. Sampai aku bacanya agak merinding. Butuh waktu rehat sejenak untuk membaca. Terutama Karakter Astrid yang semula polos berubah 180 derajat. Seperti dia punya karakter berbeda. Sayangnya, tulisan yang diusung kurang mengena. Penempatan dialog tag yang terasa membingungkan jika belum paham. Serta penggunaan tanda baca sering berubah-ubah seperti tanda (-). Meski begitu, diksi yang simpel memudahkanku untuk ketagihan membacanya. Kuharap terus perbaiki kualitas tulisanmu ya. Tidak perlu kecil hati.
I never thought that a gigolo played VRMMO before. never expect that. The story was interesting though character design needs to improvement. Especially description. For World background, i think was good explaination. I hope that you need to consider about character design and how to make each character. I recommended this story for the reader, who loves the unique protagonist