Deceptive reflection

Christan stood by the fountain , the night air caressing his skin like an abominable snowman . Above him , the sky was an ocean black with stars like dead glowworms flickering in the throes of their death .

He held his blanket tighter around himself and sighed inpatiently .

" Where are you ? " Christan asked out loud .

" I'm , " River jumped out from the water , " Here ! "

Christan backed up and put his hand on his chest , feeling his heart beat as if it was about to jailbreak . What the hell was wrong with this ghost !?

" Why did you do that ? You scared me half to death . " Christan said in an angry whisper .

River sat on the fountain edge and put on a sad face , " I'm sorry . "

" Don't even try it . " Christan said glaring at him , " I know you are not sorry . "

" I am . " River said moving up to Christan , he raised his hand and caressed Christan's cheek ," I will always be sorry for making you mad. "

" Oh , alright . You know why I came here . " Christan said to the phantom and River moved back and sat back on the fountain rim .

" Do you want to play a game ? " River asked him and Christan tried to keep his patience .

" No , River . " Christan said sitting next to him , " You came to me the day we fell under your friend's spell . You were with me when I was alone in my mind and I told you I'm grateful . I also told you I'd help you heal . "

The day Carey cast his enchantment across Pearl orphanage , Christan had been in the garden pruning the roses . River had appeared before him and hugged him tightly .

" Please don't let me fade away . " He'd begged Christan and before Christan could say anything , he fell asleep .

He didn't dream but only saw darkness. It was terrifying and the only thing that kept him from panicking was the feeling of River holding onto him . He could feel it even in his mind .

When he woke up , he found River still holding him but the ghost looked faded . He was more transparent than before and Christan could barely make him out .

" River ? Are you alright ? " He'd asked but the ghost had not answered . He'd turned him around and saw he was asleep as well .

" River ? " Christan had asked him , " Please wake up . "

River had merely faded more and Christan had not known what to do . So he'd held onto him until there was nothing in his arms . When he'd seen that River had vanished , he'd cried . He'd been listless and distracted the day after . When the Sisters asked them to pray , he barely said anything .

Then last night , he'd closed his eyes and dreamt that River was calling him from the fountain . He'd ran to him , trying to get to him but then he'd woken up . When he did , River was standing in front of him with a smile on his rosy lips .

He'd been shocked , relieved , confused but so happy he'd jumped and hugged the phantom with tears rolling down his eyes .

" What's the matter ? " River asked him confused , " Why are you crying ? "

" I thought I'd lost you ! " Christan sobbed .

" Lost ? I wasn't lost , I was waiting for ... him . " River said looking behind him as if waiting for someone to come through the door , " He could be back. I have to go . "

" Go ? " Christan couldn't believe his ears ! The ghost had held him , begged him to not let him fade away and disappeared without a trace . Now , he was acting as if Christan was a mere distraction and he had better things to do .

" River ? Look at me . " Christan said as he moved infront of the ghost's line of sight .

" He ... he is coming back . I have to be there where he said I should wait . " River told Christan as if he didn't understand and that was true . He hadn't understood at all and before he could say anything the ghost had vanished .

Christan had been hurt , it stung that River could just leave him like that . But he realized something ; River was broken . There was something wrong with his mind . It explained his vacant behavior sometimes but as for his silliness ... Christan assumed that was how he was when he was alive .

Chris had layed back on the bed and before he slept he made a promise to help River with his past . Because what else but the past would cause that ? And Christan would help him heal .

" Heal from what ? " River asked him and a rose petal landed in his hand , before it faded through him and landed in the fountain .

" River , I am serious . No jest or attempt at humor . " Christan said sternly and River looked down , his hair covering his eyes .

" I know something happened to you - something you don't want to tell me completely . " Christan said but River didn't respond , the wheat brown haired boy carried on " You told me a bit the first we met in my dreams , remember ? You spoke about the first Reverend father , the Frenchman who came and built Pearl orphanage ; Luis Lechont . You also said - "

" Please ! " River raised his eyes and Christan saw tears in them , " Don't say what you want to say . It's wrong , you're wrong . I won't believe you ... so stop . "

Christan opened his mouth to speak but then he thought better of it . He turned to the water with a disgruntled frown , moving his fingers onto the water .

He wanted to tell River the truth , what everyone in the orphanage knew but he didn't want to hear it . So what could he do ? He didn't want to make the silly ghost cry but he also didn't want to leave him in his delusion .

" Do you want to play a game ? " River asked softly not looking at Christan .

A game ? Christan thought in a whitewash of rage but just as his anger appeared , it dissolved . He lifted up a rose petal and looked at a moment before he let it go .

" Alright , " he said turning to River , he leaned forward and kissed his cheek . It was like kissing air .

" Let's play a game . " Christan said with a smile, " A finding game . "

" Finding game ? " River asked him with a frown .

" Yes , we have to find ... something from your past. I need to know something about you , don't I ? " Christan asked him with a smile .

" About me ? I ... suppose that is right . " River said thoughtfully and then he smiled widely , " I know where we should go . Come ! "

River grabbed Christan's hand and lifted the boy up onto his feet . Christan just smiled as River led him to a place with something about his past . He just hoped it would be something good .

.....

Nathan groaned internally , his face a perfect description of anger . He thought about moving again but decided against it , since what happened before could happen again .

But for the love of grace , why did he have to sleep here with ... Ugh !?

He was on a nice central double person bed , in a not so wide room at Sal's inn . The floor was wood and a night stand was next to the right side of bed . A looking glass hung on the wall at the base of the bed making it the first thing anyone sees when they wake up ... if they were vampires .

The sheets were soft and the room was warm , compared to abysmal cold of night beyond the window . It would have been very comfortable for Nathan had he been alone and had the room been only his ... but it wasn't .

On the night of his arrival , and after meeting Gerald again after so many years , he had wanted to kill him , find his sister and leave Yellow Cove . But Sal had something to say about that .

" Oy ! You can't kill him , " Sal said as Nathan roughly grabbed Gerald by the collar , " At least not here . I have a business to run . If you want to spill blood , and if it's not a chicken or pig's , go outside . "

" It's pouring . " Nathan said , " But don't worry . I won't spill a drop of blood . There are other ways to kill a man . "

" Might we talk about this ? " Gerald said nervously as Nathan looked him with murderous intent , " I married Serena long back , when you were but a boy . You've certainly grown but I don't see why you are mad . "

" You don't see why ? " Nathan said and he threw the bastard off his person . He reached into his pocket and pulled out a letter .

" Read this ! Read this and find out why I want to end this blithering boar . " He said putting it infront of them . Sal and Gerald moved to read the letter , which went as follows ;

{ Dear Reverend father

I must apologize to you first and to God second . Why do ask ?

Because I sinned to you before I sinned to the Lord .

As you well know , last fortnight I ventured to the back country to see the small towns and their people . And it was on this excursion that I met Gerald Fox , the lecherous disgrace of the town of Yellow Cove .

Although the man is reputed to be from a modernistic family with moderate wealth , Mr Fox does not at first show this . When I met him , or rather when he approached me , I felt inclined to tell him about the Lord and maybe save his lustful soul .

But woe befell me because it was not long before my sinful flesh became inticed by him . I wish I could say I resisted with all my might but I would be lying and I believe I have sinned enough in this life .

It was no more than two days before Gerald Fox had me in his bed and had his way with my maidenhood . Forgive me Reverend father , for I enjoyed it . I truly did .

And that is why , if you are reading this letter , I am not here on this Earth for you to inquire of it's truthfulness . I would have taken my life by the time you finished reading it . You know why ...

The angels of hell call me now , Father . I only ask , that you pray for the maidens who have yet to err as I did by meeting the Fox of Yellow Cove .

Goodbye to all , especially Nathan

Love , Amelia }

When she finished Sal looked up at Nathan and then turned to Gerald who was wide eyed , shocked that one of his conquests committed suicide .

" How does this have anything to do with your sister ? And who is this woman who killed herself ? " Sal asked him .

" Her name was Amelia and she was part of my congregation . I am a clergyman, a priest at Saint Valerie's church near Boston . " Nathan said softly , " She was found dead , in a tub , with her wrists slit , and to think I let my sister marry a man who leads innocent women down such a road ... I would have chopped your tongue off, if I could get back to the day my sister first saw you . "

Nathan grabbed Gerald by the collar again and placed his head on the countertop . Gerald swallowed as he saw the rage in those crystal blue eyes . Damn , he thought , I'm done for .

" You wasted your time . "

"..."

" I'm sorry , what did you say ? " Nathan ask Sal who had spoken up .

The innkeeper folded her arms and looked at him with a wryly smile .

" You wasted your time . Your sister hasn't been with that man since the last Baron passed through this town . " Sal said and she lifted up two cups of ale , " She found out about your ' brother-in-law ' way back . She was pissed , mad as a hornet's nest on Friday the 13th . "

" Serena knew ? She knows ? " Nathan asked her and she nodded her head , " Then why hasn't she come home ? All this year's , why didn't she return to me and grandma Lillian ? "

" I don't know . She just opened up a shop and left his house . " Sal said placing the ale infront of him , " She's your sister . So you tell me . "

Nathan had frowned in consternation but then he'd let Gerald go . He had sighed and grabbed the cup of ale , taking a deep swing .

Just as I thought , he had thought , she really never planned on coming back .

He'd contemplated about this since the day his sister left their grandmother's house . He'd argued with himself that she might come back but deep down he had known his sister . Serena was a free spirit and he'd had have had to have been a fool to not notice that she hated being at grandmother's house . She had been looking for escape and that had been Gerald Fox , the bastard .

But even when she found out about who he was , she didn't come back . She wouldn't ... not even for him . A tear formed on his cheek and Nathan sniffled slightly , as he lowered his head .

" Look , I'm sorry . About this Amelia woman and your sister . But in all my years as I've known this damn buffoon of a man next to you , I've learnt one thing ; he ain't no rapist . " Sal said looking at Gerald who was glancing at Nathan with curious eyes , " Sure he sleeps with women left and right , young and old , especially old , but he don't force himself on any of em . This Amelia woman chose to sleep with him just as that Serena married him , a surprise in itself because he never seemed to be the marrying type . "

" What are you saying ? " Nathan asked her , " That I came here for ... nothing ? That my sister doesn't need me ? She does not want me ? "

" Well , I ain't saying that . " Sal said with ratsed eye brows , " But I am saying , you can't fault a man for being himself only for being the worst self he can be . "

" Isn't he that already ? " Nathan demanded , " How many women has he left in his wake , sad and bitter or broken ? "

" Those women made their choices and knew who he was , except your sister but she learned . Now Gerald , he's far from perfect . But is he his worst self ? ... that I'm not sure of . "

" I don't understand . " Nathan said taking more ale .

" You don't have to . Heck , I don't understand half the things I just said , must be the Lord speaking through me . " Sal said with a chuckle and Nathan almost smiled . Almost .

" So , now what ? " Nathan asked , " I can't fault him for Amelia's death and Serena ... doesn't need me . Should I go home ? "

" You're a grown man . It's your choice . " Sal said with a smile , " But if you want , you could stay here . "

" Why would he do that ? " Gerald asked her .

" You shut it , before I kill you . " Sal said to him with a glare and turned to Nathan , " You know I've seen a lot of people come in and out of this inn . Some good , some bad and some a bit in the gray . I've also seen people driven by pain and guilt and shame , trying to make things right but lacking the will to do so . "

" What are you saying ? " Nathan asked with anxiety in his voice and Gerald paid closer attention .

" When your congregation heard about this Gerald and Amelia news , I'm guessing it didn't go well when they also learnt he was your brother-in-law . " Sal said and Nathan looked anywhere but her eyes .

" I don't need an answer . You don't have to give me one . But here's what you can do , " Sal pointed at Gerald , " Stay in his room and watch him for me . "

" Why would I stay in his room ? " Nathan asked incredulously .

" He might kill me in my sleep . " Gerald whispered intensely .

" Nah , he won't . " Sal said looking at Nathan , " I've seen killers too and this man , ain't one . "

" I still don't see why I should stay in the same room as this pig !? " Nathan yelled and people turned to them .

" Because we ain't got room for more people except for his room and because , " Sal said sweetly , " it's my inn and my rules . "

So there Nathan was , in a bed with Gerald Fox , the man he wanted to kill but couldn't . Or ... wouldn't .

Nathan turned from the window and faced Gerald , his face even more handsome in sleep . His eyes wandered over his facial features slowly as if refreshing his memory . After a few minutes he turned away with a huff .

Bastard , he thought as he shut his eyes and tried to sleep .

But if he had stayed awake and turned around in time, he would have seen Gerald open his eyes softly and look at him . He would have seen him smile slowly and notice him intentionally move his arm around his chest and lean into him .

But he didn't and Gerald had the smile on his face as he went back to sleep .