Reality Denial?

Humans can be fragile. Not physically, but mentally.

Your mentality can either be your greatest fortress or the culprit of your despair. In other words, a double-edged sword. If one's mentality collapses, it does not matter how strong or skilled one is. They lose the ability to accomplish anything.

There are several reasons for one's mind to be lost.

Endless challenges without any positive results for decades could weaken the sharpest determination. Intense bullying could lead a strong person to their demise. Serious mental health issues without help could bring tragic suicides.

Then, what if a loved, confident, and normal modern youth with a bright path ahead was transmigrated into a little girl? And what if that little girl was kidnapped, tied to a metal bed, and tested on every day?

Most modern people are not creatures that can endure too much pain. We evolved, but our pain tolerance shrank. A normal reaction would be to deny reality and stubbornly believe that everything that happened was nothing more but a nightmare. However, humanity is a race with strong adaptability as well. They would do anything to survive after realizing there were no other choices.

But they will definitely not adapt right away. Even the strongest of minds would take some time to recuperate.

Therefore, Ly chose to enter a phrase called "Reality Denial". She did not struggle when the three men examined and injected that weird substance into her small body, nor did she do anything worth mentioning at the study hall once she passed out in that room. The room got bigger than it already was, the virtual screen got its audio function, and the ceiling's countdown timer kept ticking.

However, all Ly did was sit on the big leather chair and stare aimlessly into space without focus. Her eyes looked dead. Desperation and a hint of terror could be sensed from those beautiful blue eyes.

The three men considered Ly's behavior to be normal. She still managed to endure more than four minutes every time, and that was more than enough for them. They said they had already requested to meet the Baron, but it seemed like he did not have time yet, for it had been nearly a week. However, the three men did not look impatient. They carried out their jobs devotedly, with smooth actions like that of a machine's, minus the occasional talks.

On the seventh day since her transmigration, the Baron came. He also had his mask on and came when Ly's endurance was about to hit rock bottom. She did not hear clearly what he said since the pain was still escalating like always, but she did catch an important sentence and some phrases before passing out. And the shock expressions on the three men's faces. Expressions similar to one when they get to know what they shouldn't have.

"…we will commence with the brainwashing in two weeks and send her back to where she belongs."

"…to forget everything that happened here…she knows me…"

"…will take care of Winford's side."

The familiar study room materialized before Ly again. Her eyes slowly gained focus as she stretched her body and looked around. Both resolution and unwillingness could be seen from her lively eyes.

'I guess that's enough. Whatever existence that tossed me here, they should be relieved now that I am just a normal modern youth. I was reluctant since it seems like 'they' may have invaded my own subconsciousness and created this room, but it doesn't look like I have the chance to sit idly and observe even if that's real.'

'It's a bit annoying knowing there's a possibility that my own thoughts are exposed to a third party like some comic characters. But again, I have no choice. I'm not omnipotent.'

Ly stood up from the comfortable chair to grab all the documents on the huge table. Her small hands could not reach every corner while sitting yet.

'Oh well, immediate danger ahead is more important than the distant ones anyways. This room looks more like a manifest of my, no, Adelaide's subconsciousness. It's like the privilege of being able to review all events that had happened to an individual whenever they want. I should stop being paranoid.'

Ly sighed as she climbed back on the chair. The documents were placed neatly before her.

'I can't afford to be brainwashed. I'll be Adelaide Winford from now. Let's walk through her memory land and find a way to escape. As for going back…'

Ly, no, Adelaide picked up the first file and looked through 'her' basic information. Her gaze stopped at the ticking timer on the wall for a second before focusing entirely on the papers.

'…I'll just decide when there's a chance. No use having false hope at this point.'

ΘΘΘ

The 14-day deadline until the brainwashing event made Adelaide feel like she was back in her past world studying for final exams. The slight tension, the occasional information dumps, the trick questions (for example, how to get out intact as a 6-year-old little girl?) …well, except for the fact that she would be brainwashed the moment she failed the said exam.

At first, Adelaide thought her hearing might fool her with the 'brainwashing' stuff since she was in pain and all. However, the virtual screen, the only high-tech equipment in her vintage room of subconsciousness proved otherwise: she could replay the whole thing that had happened around her physical body.

As a result, Adelaide spent half an hour making sure she got every piece of information she could possibly get from all the 'recordings' right. There was some useful information here and there, and Adelaide could finally confirm that she would be brainwashed in two weeks.

Next, the information dumps. Adelaide was no stranger to this definition, but she was not a last-minute type of student. She was the one that would study diligently in advance and go to sleep early the night before exams while her classmates pull an all-nighter.

'I finally understand how those students felt.' Adelaide mocked herself while adjusting her position within piles of books.

For the last three days, she had explored almost everything in the big study room. In short, the room simply is Adelaide's memory land. It recorded every single thing that had happened in her life, despite how trivial. Normal people could never remember all events precisely, so to Adelaide, this room was a treasure trove.

The brain's consciousness could never do such a thing. Adelaide was no expert, but she recalled psychologists used to compare a human's subconsciousness as the lower part of an iceberg. So, she decided to call the room "room of subconsciousness".

The library behind the big desk was full of books stacked neatly on various bookshelves. The books recorded everything from the moment the original Adelaide was born until now. It was like reading journals. The ones with too many details.

There was one unfortunate thing: the events that happened to her and what she read back on Earth were not stored here. The room only recorded what had happened to the original Adelaide, and now it would only record the events around her now that she's Adelaide.

The room itself was connected to this physical body.

Adelaide was a reader, a bookworm to be precise, but even she was bored after a while. Mind you, the books recorded even the smallest of things. The first journal Adelaide grabbed was one of the most recent – she wanted to see if there were any clues about her transmigration. However, there was nothing out of the ordinary except for the unnecessary details of how she was experimented on. Luckily, the books did not record her thoughts, so the profanities she spewed were all excluded.

To save herself from boredom, Adelaide tried using the virtual screen. If the journals were all digitalized, they would become documentaries. She'd rather watch documentaries.

There were good and bad news.

The good news was that Adelaide could navigate and rewatch past "videos" easily by tapping directly on the screen with top-notch quality. If she wanted to, she can even see each thread that made up the Baron's clothes as clear as day.

The bad news was that it only had recordings from the moment Adelaide was transmigrated here. It seemed like the virtual screen was some kind of package deal that appeared only because Ly was here instead of the original Adelaide.

That was why Adelaide's painstaking journey of learning about the Princess of Winford began. Since the body's original memory did not come to her like what most protagonists in novels get, she had to study everything herself.

Despite having no clock in the study room nor in the experimental room in the physical world, Adelaide still managed to tell the time with the help of the virtual screen and those three white coats. The three bastards usually came in at around seven in the morning and left at nine when she passed out, so Adelaide actually had 22 hours left to figure out whatever she needed.

There was no time to absorb everything in the library, so Adelaide had to make a choice: she skimmed through the books as fast as possible and only memorized major events. Needless to say, Adelaide's life at the Winford Household had some extremely messed up internal issues, but she decided to think about that later.

After three days of self-experimenting and information dumping, Adelaide summed up her thoughts on what she could do and what her problems were.

'First, the findings. I could enter this room as long as my physical body is unconscious. There's the issue of my body's safety, but since I have the 24/7 exclusive CCTV, I should be fine. I could get out of this room and wake up at will, and I could also enter this room if I want to and close my eyes. Being in here for long periods of time does not harm my physical body, as my body was simply 'sleeping'. I can rewatch the video recordings and read the journals, but the collective memory of a six-year-old does not contain everything about this world. The room expanded after that so-called aie injection, but it looks like the effect stopped two days ago.'

'Now, for the issues…' Adelaide sighed and furrowed her brows in annoyance.

'First, where did the remaining aie substance go? If I consider it to be some kind of ability enhancement liquid, then am I overdosed already? And they're still pumping that suspicious stuff inside my body excitedly…fuck, will I explode at this rate? It already hurts like hell; I don't want to experience being blown up.'

'Second, how can I escape? I don't know what effects brainwashing brings, but it could not be good. I woke up early yesterday to go inspect the room, but there was nothing usable whatsoever. There was only one door. There will definitely be guards standing outside. I'm no martial artist, I can't fight. The door is locked from the outside too.'

'Third, what the heck happened this morning? My finger disappeared one minute after aie was injected. No, rather than disappearing, it disintegrated? It broke down into pieces until nothing was left. But then when I discovered the issue and freaked out, wanting it back, it just appeared as if nothing happened? I thought I was hallucinating, but the virtual screen's recording showed the same thing.'

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Proofreader: krissaira