Stuck in my own head

Ever felt like you're stuck in a void but nothing has changed, the world is still functioning as normal and no one knows you're dying inside, if you do then welcome to my world where I'm lost and dying yet safe and alive.

I look into their eyes and feel as though they have all the happiness in the world, all that happiness I for one have lost , depression,trauma, anxiety and insomnia eating at me like a wicked disease.

How I grow tired of life and yet suicide fails everytime. Pills,poison,knives and wires all in vain, drowning and burning fails and useless. I feel like a damned soul to walk this earth until the end of time.

The devil has a better time than I a meer mortal, he watches as the evil burn and feel pain whereas I live and feel like I'm dying yet alive, burning yet cold, full of emotions yet emotionless, hot yet cold , safe yet alone. That is how I feel daily and it's a neverending cycle.

Will you journey with me through this maze of confusion as I deal with all these emotions and try to heal and live again