Chapter 50: Loss

Author's Notes: This Chapter was not easy to write. Things are going to be emotional.

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Kelrian's eyes widened, his heart stopped beating for a moment and his throat felt dry. He parted his lips to say something, but like his sister, he was speechless. He couldn't believe it at first but the longer he looked at them, the more he got convinced that his best friend had said the truth. His brother was dead. He died during the battle. He had been killed by these green bastards.

Kelrian would never see him again. He hadn't had any contact with him over the past eighteen years. He hadn't cared about him most of the time but now he did. He had started liking his brother after he had found out that he didn't hate him anymore. He would have gotten closer to him and befriended him again but that would never happen because Seitor was dead. He would never see him, talk to him or do something with him again.

Kelrian stared at his hands, his ears hung low and his face reflected sadness and grief. He had loved his brother so the news about his death shocked him. He didn't know what to say or what to do. He just sat there and did nothing. He felt a hand on his shoulder but he didn't look at the hand's owner.

He had no clue how much time had passed as he lifted his gaze eventually. For him, it had felt like an eternity. But as he looked at the nearest clock, he realized that only half an hour had passed. Zetai and Sydori still stood next to his bed. Zetai had wrapped his arms around the smaller woman and pressed her slightly against him as she sobbed her heart out. He gave his best to comfort her.

Kelrian knew he should be the one to comfort her but he was a mess at the moment. He was glad his best friend took care of his sister so she wouldn't be alone. He was glad she had someone who comforted her. Zetai was not a bad guy. He may not be a good guy because he had killed a pregnant woman only to get his revenge but he was not an evil person. He cared for his fellow men. At least for all high elves. Kelrian was not sure if Zetai cared about the humans and dwarves the same way.

Kelrian didn't say anything. He just looked at his best friend and his sister, regarding them for a while. A priest came to him after a while. It was a young human who had short black hair, a full-beard and a scar on the left side of his neck. He wore a blue robe with the symbol of Lordaeron on its chest.

He didn't say anything as he stopped next to Kelrian and examined his arm carefully. He looked in Kelrian's face as soon as he was done examining. "How do you feel?"

"My arm hurts but the pain is bearable, at least for the moment," responded Kelrian.

"I will cast a spell to ease the pain, then I will give you some medicine that will help you. Your bones should heal faster and the pain should become bearable."

Kelrian nodded his head silently. The priest muttered a few sentences and his hands started to glow golden. He held his hands right above Kelrian's arm, not daring to touch it. Kelrian noticed that the pain diminished slowly but it didn't disappear. He felt much better once the priest was done. The man signalized him that he would come back soon, then he walked away. He returned a few minutes later with a tin of white pills. He handed it over to Kelrian who took it without hesitation. "Take two of these pills whenever you eat something. They should help you."

Kelrian gave the man a small smile. "Thank you."

"I'm not done yet. I need to put your arm in a plaster cast," spoke the human.

Kelrian nodded.

"Would you follow me?"

Kelrian nodded again and got up, following the priest out of the room.

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Kelrian returned to the first hall after two hours. His right arm had been bent and put in a plaster cast as the priest had said. The plaster cast would prevent that his bones would grow crooked. The priest had told him that his bones would need a few weeks to heal. He had also told him that he shouldn't burden his arm too much as soon as he could move it again. He recommended him to not join the war for at least one entire month after the plaster cast had been removed.

Kelrian didn't like what the priest had said but he knew he was right. He didn't like to be useless and unable to fight but he had no other choice. Joining the battle too soon could lead to incurable wounds if he would get injured again. He wanted to fight as soon as possible but he had no other choice than waiting. He wouldn't do himself a favour if his arm would get injured again.

Nevertheless, he hoped that the war wouldn't last that long. He orcs had lost tens of thousands of warriors. They had probably lost more than half of their army, so Kelrian hoped the united forces of the Alliance would defeat them once and for all. He hoped that the Warchief would either be captured or killed. It was a shame that a few of Zul'jin's remaining warriors had managed to rescue their leader a few days ago. Because of that Kelrian hoped that at least the Warchief would pay for his crimes.

Kelrian had been more than just surprised as the priest had told him that a group of the remaining Amani trolls had attacked the camp Zul'jin had been held and rescued the leader of the Amani. Halduron Brightwing had been wounded by the trolls but survived. Zul'jin may have lost his arm but he had managed to escape.

Kelrian was not delighted that this bastard escaped. So many high elves, humans and dwarves died to capture Zul'jin but he escaped. It seemed that his comrades died for nothing but the truth was that they didn't waste their lives. The Amani army had been almost completely annihilated. Zul'jin didn't have enough warriors to plan a counter-attack. All he could do was to hide somewhere and hope the Alliance would never find him. The Amani trolls were no longer a threat for the Alliance. Only the orcs were left but it was only a matter of time until the Alliance would defeat them as well.

Kelrian wished he could join the final battle and be there when the Warchief would fall in battle or get captured. But he assumed the Alliance wouldn't wait too long to attack Blackrock Spire, the base of the orcs. The war wouldn't endure much longer if everything would go according to plan but things usually didn't go as the Alliance had planned.

Nobody would have expected that the orcs would enslave the Red Dragonflight and use its members to burn a large portion of the high elf army. Nobody would have expected that the orcs would destroy Stormwind in the first war. Things never went as people expected, so Kelrian could only hope the orcs would be defeated as soon as possible. He also hoped the Alliance wouldn't lose too many soldiers. Many would die, he was sure of that but he still hoped for the best outcome.

Kelrian walked to his bed, finding out that Zetai and Sydori were sitting on it. They were physically not as close to each otheras they had been two hours. They sat there and stared at each other without saying anything. Kelrian walked to them silently and sat down between them.

"You are back," Sydori said quietly. Kelrian nodded silently and stared into her eyes. He could still see the grief in her eyes and he could understand it. He was also mourning for his brother. His relationship with Seitor had never been as good as the one Sydori had with him. Nevertheless, he really missed him already. His brother had changed his mind about him. He had no longer regarded him as a piece of shit. Kelrian and Seitor would have become as close again as they had been before their father had stirred Seitor and Sydori against their younger brother.

Their bond would have been restored over the time if Seitor wouldn't have fallen in the battle. But now that he was gone, Kelrian would never find out if Seitor had truly changed. He would never see him again, would never be able to speak to him and spend time with him. Seitor was gone forever Kelrian got really depressed when he thought about him. He had no idea how he should tell his mother that she would never be able to see her oldest son again. Hearing the bad news would break his mother's heart. He knew he had to tell her as soon as he would see her again.

But he had no idea how. He had to break it to her gently. She would break out in tears, he was sure about that and he would comfort her as best as he could. He had to. He also had to tell the bad news to his younger siblings. Cincia and Sindor wouldn't be happy either. He had to tell his family because he didn't want that a stranger would do it. But first, he had to comfort Sydori somehow.

She had stopped crying for the moment but that didn't mean she was fine. Kelrian assumed that she would need some time to come to terms with Seitor's death. He had no idea how long his family would need to accept Seitor's death. He didn't even know how long he would need. He just knew that accepting his death wouldn't be easy.

Sylvanas hadn't left her room for nearly three weeks after the death of her brother. She was the strongest person he knew but not even she had been able to overcome her grief within a short amount of time. He could only assume that his sister would also need a lot of time to cope with Seitor's death. But he would be there for her and comfort her as best as he could. It would be a bit easier for them because they could get through this phase of grief together.

Kelrian knew that his brother's death had hit Sydori much harder than him so he would stay with her as long as she would need him. He wouldn't be able to return to the battlefield for at least two months so he had enough time he could spend with his family and try to comfort them as best as he could. He had enough time to cope with Seitor's death for his own. And he had enough time he could spend with Sylvanas once he was sure his family was alright.

He had to tell his family about Sylvanas when the right time had come. He could only do that once his family had accepted Seitor's death. But he will tell them about Sylvanas and their baby, he just didn't know when exactly it will happen. All he could do was to wait for the perfect moment.

He was pretty sure Sylvanas would share the news with her family. Alleria and her mother knew about him so did Vereesa and her father. They knew about him but they didn't know about the child she was expecting. He wondered how they would react and how his family would react. He hoped they would be happy and wouldn't mind that he and Sylvanas weren't married. Alleria and Turalyon hadn't been married when Arator had been born nor were they married these days. He assumed that Sylvanas' family wouldn't mind that his and Sylvanas' baby would be born out of wedlock.

He was not sure what his family would say but he assumed that they wouldn't really mind. His mother had told him often enough that she would be happy as long as he would be happy. His father wouldn't like it, he was sure about that, but he didn't care about his father's opinion. He didn't care about his father and didn't respect him anymore, not after everything he had done. The only opinions that mattered for him were the ones of his mother, siblings, friends and of course the opinion of Sylvanas. He didn't care what others thought about him. He didn't care what others would think about him once the public will find out about him, Sylvanas and their baby.

"How are you doing, Sydori?" Kelrian asked after he had been silent for nearly five minutes.

"I don't know yet... I feel... shattered... Shattered and empty..."

Kelrian nodded silently and put a hand on her left cheek, wiping the tears away which left her eyes. "Does anyone know how...how it happened?" Kelrian asked quietly. Sydori shook her head slowly. Kelrian turned his head to look at Zetai whose facial expression was neutral. "A female orc threw her battle axe at him. It hit him in the chest... I assume you can imagine the rest."

Kelrian nodded to him sadly, his ears hung low and his eyes reflected grief.

"I didn't know him at all nor did you talk much about him. I just knew that your relationship was not the best. Nevertheless, I do feel bad that he died. You may have not gotten along with him very well but he was your brother after all. I have had lots of arguments with my brother and I had hated him from time to time but I still miss him even though he was an asshole most of the time. I would give everything to see him again but...," a sad sigh escaped Zetai's lips as he paused. His eyes reflected sadness for a short moment before his facial expression became neutral again. "I'm sorry for your loss," he muttered.

Kelrian put a hand on his shoulder and patted it softly. "Thank you."

Zetai didn't say anything in response, he just stared at his friend who had a thoughtful look on his face.

"You are right that our relationship was difficult most of the time... He treated me like a piece of shit for years so did Sydori because our father manipulated them by telling them lies. I'm glad that they finally realized that he was wrong. Seitor and I would have grown closer and we could have restored the normal relationship we once had, if...if we would have had more time...," Kelrian stopped speaking and wiped the tears away which rolled down his cheeks. "But now...Now it's too late... I will never see him again... He is gone...And he will never return...," Kelrian's voice broke and he buried his face in his hands as he started to sob.

He couldn't stop the tears nor did he want to stop them. He wanted to let his feelings out, not caring what the other persons in the room would say. There was nothing wrong about showing his feelings. He let it go and showed others how he felt. The loss of his brother had affected him more than he had expected. A month ago, he would have reacted differently if he would have heard of Seitor's death but since he noticed Seitor's change of behaviour his opinion about him had changed.

For Kelrian, it didn't matter how Seitor had behaved in the past. It didn't matter anymore that he had been manipulated by their father and believed all of his lies. He had believed him without thinking about his arguments and forming his own opinion. But that didn't matter anymore. Kelrian wished he could tell him that he had forgiven him but he would never be able to do that because Seitor was dead.

The ranger felt arms around his shoulders which pulled him closer. These arms weren't as strong as Zetai's so he could only assume they were Sydori's arms. He looked up eventually, finding out it was indeed his sister who hugged him and did her best to comfort him. He stayed in her arms, pulling away after nearly an hour. He took the handkerchief Zetai offered him, wiped his tears away and dried his eyes.

"Seitor told me that he wanted to speak to me about something after the end of the battle. I guess I'll never find out what he wanted to tell me."

Zetai looked at his friend. "I think I know what he wanted to tell you."

Kelrian raised an eyebrow, giving the other ranger a curious look.

"Everything happened so fast so I'm not sure if what I have seen really happened. I saw a small fireball that hit the orc's head right before I shot my arrow at him. I might be mistaken but I'm sure that the spell came from you. You have tried to reach the orc's face with your hand but you didn't come close to it. But then a fireball was created near your opened hand and was thrown at the orc who dropped you once the flames started to consume his head."

Kelrian's eyes reflected confusion. "A fireball? From me? Are you sure?"

"A small fireball to be exact. The orc had no other choice than to let you go. I don't want to imagine what would have happened if that fireball wouldn't have hit the orc's face."

Kelrian couldn't believe what his friend had just said. A fireball. There was no way he had managed to create a fireball. He was not a mage and even if he was, it was still impossible. His vision had blurred out and everything around him had become dark as the orc had throttled him. There was no way he could have created a fireball while slowly losing his consciousness.

Zetai must be mistaken. Kelrian believed that someone else had created the fireball and thrown it at the orc and Zetai hadn't seen it coming so he believed that he had created the fireball. Kelrian was no mage nor did he have any relatives in his family who were mages. There was no way he would be able to perform magic.

"You must be mistaken, Zetai. There is no way I created a small fireball. I'm not able to cast any spell. Except for the invisible spell all rangers know."

Zetai made a thoughtful face. "It looked like that to me but maybe you are right. Maybe I have been mistaken and someone else threw the fireball at the orc. Who knows?"

Doubt and confusion were visible in Kelrian's face. "You must be right," he muttered. He didn't believe that he was capable of using magic nor did he believe he had created a fireball for the first time in a near-death situation. Zetai must be mistaken and someone else must have created the fireball.

That was the only logical explanation that came in his mind. The other explanations were far-fetched. In his opinion at least. Zetai swore what he had seen had been real but he didn't want to argue with his friend so he remained silent and stopped speaking about that topic.

Kelrian was silent so was Sydori. None of them said anything, they just stared at random spots in the room. They remained silent, each of them was hoping that the others would say something. But nobody spoke. Ten minutes had passed and no one had said anything so far. The silence was oppressive and the atmosphere was bad but none of them did anything to brighten it up. They just sat there and did nothing except moping.

Kelrian stared at his fingers as he thought about many things. He thought about Seitor, his family in general and the family he will have in five months. He thought about Sylvanas and their unborn child, wondering if he would be a good father. He wondered how much their lives would change once the public would find out about Sylvanas' pregnancy. He wondered if Sylvanas would tell the public that he was the father or if she would keep it secret and never tell anyone who the father was. He assumed her family would be the only exception in this case.

He wondered how their lives would be after the end of the war and the birth of their child. Things would change, he was sure of that. He could only hope that his life would change for the better and not the opposite. He knew his life wouldn't get easier after the birth of the baby. Sylvanas and he would have more responsibilities and would have to spend lots of their free time with the baby. Raising a child wouldn't be easy.

There were several things he had to clear up with Sylvanas. He had to discuss with her if they would make their relationship official or if they would keep it secret. If they would keep it secret, he had to talk to her how often he would be allowed to see their child. Also, he had to discuss with her who would stay at home and take care of the child until it would be old enough to go to the nursery school. There were lots of unanswered questions they had to clear and unavoidable topics they had to talk about sooner or later.

Kelrian was brought out of his thoughts as someone cleared their throat. Kelrian turned his head and jumped up immediately as he saw who was standing not far away from his hospital bed. It was no other than Anduin Lothar who regarded the three elves curiously, his arms were crossed behind his back.

"Lord Commander Lothar, it's an honour for me to meet you," said Sydori and lowered her head in respect. Kelrian did the same and looked at Zetai who hadn't done it so far. The tall elf waited a few moments, then lowered his head out of respect after debating inwardly whether he should do it or not.

Anduin Lothar gave Sydori a small smile. "I'm also honoured to meet those who helped to defend Lordaeron. Without your effort, we would have lost."

"We didn't defend Lordaeron alone. There were tens of thousands of other soldiers who helped to defend the city. Thousands died during the battle. They gave their lives to protect the innocent," replied Kelrian.

Anduin nodded his head. "Their sacrifice will not be forgotten. No soldier who fought for the Alliance will be forgotten. We all risked our lives for the greater good. We risked our lives for the Alliance. I'm grateful for everyone who fought in the battle and gave their best."

Kelrian exhaled slowly, he seemed depressed. "Too bad I was injured and hid in a closet while the others kept fighting. I didn't give everything, not like the others who still fought with their injuries while I stayed behind like a coward."

Anduin gave him a reassuring smile as he put a hand on his shoulder and patted it softly. "There is no reason for you to blame yourself. You gave your best and fought for days. You got injured so you stayed behind the front because you couldn't fight properly with your broken arm. There is no shame in retreating. You would have found a quick death if you would have returned to the wall with a broken arm. The orcs would have killed you within a few minutes.

As you have witnesses, the orcs are very powerful creatures. One swing can be enough to kill one of our soldiers. Returning to the wall would have been suicide. The decision to hide was the only right decision you could have made in your situation.

You wouldn't have helped anyone if you would have returned to the top of the wall and died pretty fast. You made the right choice and no one will ever say anything against it. You had no other choice than hiding in the wardrobe until the end of the battle. No one would ever call you a coward because you didn't return to the wall with a broken arm. You don't have to feel bad, boy."

"If you say so," muttered Kelrian after he had thought about what the warrior had said.

The old man chuckled. "I didn't see you fighting but from what I've heard I believe you fought pretty well. You should be proud of yourself and happy. Unlike over ten thousand other soldiers, you survived this brutal and bloody battle. We lost so many soldiers but the orcs lost more. This victory was bloody but very important for us. I knew from the beginning that the outcome of the battle would define the outcome of the war. This battle was one of the most important battles of the war and we won it. That's all that matters. We weakened the orcs and drove them back. We will storm Blackrock Spire soon and defeat the orcs once and for all."

Kelrian nodded his head but didn't say anything. Zetai also nodded his head and remained silent. Not even Sydori said anything. The elves just stared at the legendary warrior who regarded them, pride was reflected by his face. He was proud of everyone who went to their limits to defend the city so he was proud of them too.

He had seen Zetai fighting when his men had flanked the orcs in front of the walls and had killed as many as possible. He had climbed the wall, once the orcs had started to flee, and fought on Zetai's side against the remaining orcs on top of the wall. He was impressed by his fighting style and his pure strength. He considered the tall elf as one of the best fighters he had ever seen. He was sure that a glorious future awaited him. He had the potential to become one of the best rangers of Quel'Thalas. He could belong to the best of the best if he would keep training and becoming better and better.

Anduin hadn't seen Kelrian and his sister fighting but the soldiers of Lordaeron had told him that they had done pretty well. He had heard that Kelrian had killed lots of orcs while his sister had prevented the deaths of many injured soldiers. She had also used her abilities to shield others and protect them from arrows, spells and other missiles. She had even used her powers to harm orcs. Holy smites and holy fires had killed a few orcs who had dared to come too close to her.

All three of them had given their best so they should be proud of themselves. Nevertheless, Kelrian had the feeling he could have done more. He knew that he had given his best and Anduin even praised him and the others. Nevertheless, he was disappointed in himself. If he wouldn't have gotten injured, he could have continued to fight and killed more orcs. Less of his comrades would have died if his arm wouldn't have been broken.

He felt sad and disappointed but only for a few moments. His mood lightened up as he saw the comforting smile on the human's lips. The presence of the legendary warrior Anduin Lothar and the fact that he was proud of him made all his doubts disappear. Kelrian was no longer disappointed in himself and he even stopped thinking about what he could have done better.

He no longer thought so negatively about himself but that didn't mean all his problems had vanished. He still mourned for the loss of his brother and not even the legendary warrior could help him forget what happened. Kelrian would need more time to come to terms with Seitor's death. It wouldn't be easy to accept his death but he had enough time to do that. He wouldn't be able to fight for at least two months and he wouldn't be able to help the Alliance in a different way with just one arm.

He would have to return to Silvermoon City and wait there until he would be able to move his arm properly again. At least he wouldn't be alone. Sylvanas would be there for him, support him and help him overcome his grief. There was also his family who would support him. His family who didn't know yet that Seitor was dead. He had no clue how he would tell his mother that she would never be able to see her oldest child again. She would be shattered and mourn for him but she had to know. She was his mother so she had every right to know what happened to her oldest son.

Kelrian would be there for her and comfort her as best as he could. The next few weeks wouldn't be easy for him and his family but there was nothing he could do to change how things were. His brother was dead and he and his family must accept it. It wouldn't be easy to move on but they had to come to terms with his death and keep going.

They had to look forward and find out what was awaiting them in the future instead of clinging to the past. They had to let go one day, otherwise, they would never be able to be happy was cruel but there was nothing they could do to change that. All they could do was to accept how things were and move on.

Kelrian exhaled loudly and began to speak after he had been silent for nearly half an hour. "I want to see the corpse of my brother. If it still exists."

Anduin's eyes reflected worry. "Are you sure, boy?"

Kelrian didn't hesitate to give the old warrior a nod. "I am," he said and turned his head to look at Sydori. "Are you coming with me?" he asked as he offered her his hand.

Sydori was silent for a few moments, making a thoughtful face. She didn't give him a verbal response but she nodded at him, signalizing him that she also wanted to see Seitor's corpse.

Kelrian turned his head to the other side and looked at his best friend. "I'll come with you," said Zetai. Kelrian turned around and gave Anduin an expecting look.

A quiet sigh escaped the warrior's lips. "If it is your wish, then I will not stop you. Follow me. I will bring you to the hall where the dead are brought."

Kelrian waited until Sydori had taken his hand, then they followed Anduin and Zetai out of the room.