I Never Loved Her

Fortunately, our trip went smoothly until we safely arrived at the Duke's Residency. As our carriage entered the entrance of the Duchy, we were welcomed by the sight of the commoners who were looking in our carriage, some of them would wave their hands as if they can see us inside.

I placed my hands on my face while looking at the window. "Amusing..." I uttered in amusement. Despite of the Duke's temperament, his Duchy looks lively. In fact, if I did not know that this place is ruled by Duke Evan I would've imagined that his Duchy was being ruled by a lively Duke.

This place looks fun, I might ask Maria to roam around here sometimes.

"The Duchy looks like a lively place!" I exclaimed as I glanced at the Duke. I giggled when I return my sight at the window. "I think His Grace managed his residency well... " I said while nodding my head. His people might really love him as their Duke.

This is the reason why his people didn't even refuse the Duke's decision when he decided to commit treason to the kingdom. His people are loyal to him not to the kingdom.

According to the novel, Duke Evan is a great leader, especially in his residency. There was actually no mention of tyranny in his rule in the novel until the treason arc. His leadership is loved by his people and the only thing that the people didn't like about him is his stiff face...

And the existence of Maria Eleonor.

They didn't actually hate her, but because of the rumors circulating about her, they began to hate her existence.

At first, when I didn't know Maria Eleonor yet, I have thought that those rumors were real.

Of course, the rumors were real, however, those rumors started in a false form that evolved into truth when Maria decided to act arrogant and superior to others.

Her nanny, the one who abused her was the start of Maria's demise.

She did not only abused her, that woman was actually the one who spread the bad rumors about Maria. Plus her teachers were bad-mouthing her.

This caused my dear Maria to stand up against those people and punished them severely... that didn't actually help her since her reputation went worse after punishing them and destroying them.

She became arrogant and vicious.

That's how the people viewed her as a 'Villainess' that would soon chase Prince Ian and cause some troubles in his life.

Actually. Her arrogant attitude became my problem when I brought her to the countryside. A person's personality couldn't change in just one day... That's why I guided her and since she's willing to change, she succeeded.

But those days were unforgettable! I could still remember when she slapped a person's face for dirtying the dress that I gave her.

Hehe~ That was also the first time when my little brother Gabriel nagged her and told her to reflect on her attitude. He even told her to fill one whole notebook with a statement of 'I Maria Eleonor won't just randomly slap anyone's faces,'

That punishment bothered her for days until she finished writing it in the notebook and it was funny because she obediently followed my brother's order.

It was actually one of the punishments I created for Gabriel whenever he causes trouble as a child

Lol...

As you can see, Maria was a villain...

However, she is also a human who is capable of changing.

And now, I am glad because she won't end up like a real villainess like what had happened to the novel.

This is the reason why I am doing this... To protect her.

"There was a festival tomorrow that's why today they were lively" I went into my senses when the Duke replied to my statement. "They were usually excited to these types of events," He said.

"Really?" My eyes sparkled because of that statement. Duke Evan nodded his head while glancing at me.

"Yes," He replied and I went silent.

Silence enveloped us. I was busy having my monologue here, I can't focus on talking right now. I am kinda curious about one thing. I wanted to ask the Duke but I might totally cross the line.

"Your Grace, may I ask you a question," I asked in a solemn tone. I took a deep breath while collecting all of the bluntness on my body. It's not like I haven't done this... I hope he will answer my question truthfully. "It's about Maria's treatment in your manor in the past"

I noticed that his stopped flipping the book in his hand. He glanced at me. "What is it that you wanted to know?" He asked carefully, I don't know but his face became softer when he said that.

"Maria was abused by her nanny in your manor, why did you not do anything about it in the past?" I asked bluntly. I am curious about it, I want to know if he really doesn't care about his daughter because no matter how stiff his emotions are, I view him as a responsible man.

"I was never informed about it" He answered me. "I was only informed when my daughter suddenly punished that woman severely along with her teachers. I investigated that incident because for years of being silent she acted like that."

For the first time, his expression changed into something unusual. His face became soft while he is glancing at me, a totally different reaction!

"If I had known it earlier I would be the one to punish them for their audacity to hurt my daughter" His eyes went to the window as if avoiding my stares at him. "Her nanny and teachers was recommended by a proper noble, I thought that she's doing fine with those people but I was wrong"

"I sent one of my trusted people to observe Maria's well-being, but in the end, that person's report was the opposite of what's truly happening to her. Later on, it was finally revealed that those people were spies of the nobles who have ill intent towards me"

My eyes went wide while listening to his explanation. I can't believe it! They attacked Maria and ruined her childhood because they wanted to drag down the Duke!

But It will never happen if the Duke personally took care of his daughter... If he only paid attention to her personally. "D-do you hate her? I mean it's not like you hate her but why didn't you personally..."

"I never loved her" He suddenly replied. His face became cold while saying those words. "Nor cared for her genuinely" My mouth gaped because of his straightforward remarks. If he is telling the truth then he is too cold!

He really didn't care for his daughter.

He is not the misunderstood type of character... I'm slightly disappointed, but it's not like the novel did not speak of this. The only thing that was never mentioned in the novel is his handsome face.

I tried to calm myself, I asked him a question, then I have to listen carefully without judging him.

"But she's my daughter and she's my responsibility. I was never taught how to love or take care of a human being. I only need to focus on my responsibility as a Duke."

"Ha, Sh*t... You... never..." I don't know what to say because those words were powerful, I just wanted to slap him. However... I can't do that because of our status. "T-then why did you take her back? Don't tell me it's only because of your responsibility as her father?"

It took him minutes before he answered my question. "According to a book..." He suddenly uttered. "To love means to cultivate feelings," He said while glancing at me. His statement made me shocked...

I suddenly felt nostalgia when he said those words.

It was a line from my favorite book in this world, and the line that I once said to Maria when she suddenly had a breakdown weeks after she arrived in the countryside. She asked me this one question...

'I know that I am a bad person but why can't everybody love me back? I know that you cared for me, Gabriella. However, I can feel that it's not enough for you to love me as a friend'

I took a sigh before patting her head. Although she just caused trouble for today, I really find her pitiful, I can't chase her out...

I want to help her...

'According to a book...'

I suddenly uttered

'....'To love means to cultivate feelings' I can't love you right away but as long as we bond together and get to understand each other's feelings'

'I will someday give you the love that will surely satisfy your heart and you might do the same thing to me like we are a family... I will understand you for causing us trouble for today'

'As long as you're trying your best, I will be patient'

"I have no excuse for my previous actions. I took her in as my responsibility. As her father in flesh and blood, but it's not enough to give her that familial love" He said with a stiff face. "That's why I never focused on her well-being"

"Then why did you only choose to do that now?" I asked. "You're a Duke and Maria did not bother to hide her actual well-being with me. For five years... Why are you only doing that now?"

Our conversation suddenly stopped the carriage stopped moving. A man suddenly opened the carriage's door as he pays his greetings to me and the Duke. The Duke remained silent as he quickly stepped out of the carriage.

When I was about to get out, Duke Evan suddenly offered his hand to help me out of the carriage. Although I'm a little bit upset, I accepted his hands as I went down to the carriage.

"Your Grace, The Young Miss is currently waiting at the Dining hall..." A butler reported to him. Evan nodded his head when he heard his report.

"Notify her about our arrival, she must be waiting there since I went out"

"I will do as you say, Your Grace" The man replied.

When the man left, the Duke took a glance at me. His eyes went on my hand who was holding his hands. I quickly took my hands away as I cleared my throat. "Forgive me, Your Grace," I said but it looks like he doesn't really mind about it...

"To answer your question a while ago" He uttered.

"What question?" I asked confusedly.

His lips curled up. He smiled...? Did he just smile? Damn! Don't give me a heart attack. I'm upset with you today! Nope, Don't! I can't! Ugh! Just why did you have to be that handsome?

I took a deep breath.

"J'ai apprécié de la voir grandir avec vos conseils" He suddenly said.

I blinked twice along with his words...

Did he just...

F*cking speak French?

"What did you say?" I asked in confusion forgetting to use some honorifics to him. I know that he spoke in French or the language of a foreign kingdom. However, He didn't bother to reply as he turned his back on me.

"I hope you to be comfortable here," He said. He raised his hands to signal his servants as he walks away "Maria is waiting for you, Lady Gabriella" He glanced at the servants with his stiff face. "Take care of my visitor"

And then he disappeared.

What was that?

What..?