Such Hardship

"Ma'am! May I ask again when I can start to learn to time walk?!"

The last time I had asked that was almost two months ago, or less than a week after I had arrived in this world, and it was not a great decision. What came after that question had not been answers, but an extra ten kilometers of running and an additional two hours of weight training each day for an entire week.

The trauma I had received from that week prevented me from speaking against Master Irnoma ever again. But recently, I realized I still had a chance. Every few days, Irnoma would switch to a completely different drill instructor personality. Although they were all rotten to the core, some were mildly nice. And they might be just nice enough to answer my question.

And now, standing in front of me was Irnoma as a bulky woman who seemed to be a bit forgiving. She had dirty blonde hair tied into a small ponytail behind her head. Her large body with bulky muscles told me that I could never beat her in a wrestling match. Over her body, she wore a familiar but different camo uniform from the rest of the drill sergeants I had met. However, despite her appearance, she had a round face with large, light brown eyes and a soft smile that didn't match her body at all.

Earlier during her supervision, I had noted that, although she had given me a more demanding than usual set, Irnoma pushed me on with encouragement the entire way. Even more, she even congratulated me after I had completed the set, something I had rarely seen in the many past weeks. When I had rested a bit too long for a rep on another one of my sets, Irnoma had simply told me to redo it instead of giving me another marathon to run. This was probably the luckiest day I had, and I could finally test my strategy.

Now, I waited tensely for Irnoma to respond to my question. My experiences had taught me that if I had anything to tell her, I would have to stand up straight, my eyes staring in front of me, and not move an inch.

On the edge of my vision, I saw Irnoma fold her arms. "How 'bout I ask you a question, eh? Damien?" She waited for a second, and when I didn't move, she asked again. "You wanna look towards me while I'm asking' you a question, man?"

"Yes! Ma'am!" I quickly turned my entire body without hesitation. Now I was looking up into her soft eyes, but my body was still tense.

When Irnoma saw that I was paying attention, she put her arms back down to her sides and continued. "So, I simply want ya to remind me: what's the point in askin' such a useless question, eh?"

As I thought about her question, I didn't dare look away. What was the point in asking her when we could get to the time travel stuff? If I could simply travel to any point in time, then it wouldn't matter if I spent a month or a decade here, right? And more physical training was always beneficial too—wasn't that what she had said herself? Then if I hadn't started to learn to time walk, doesn't that just means I still didn't have enough physical endurance yet?

Slowly, Irnoma's eyes lost their roundness as they started to narrow. She breathed in and was about to yell something at me when I spoke. "Ma'am! The answer to your question is: I wish to learn time walking as soon as possible! I would like to train myself not only physically but in chronal skills as well! I want to become stronger! And I believe that I am ready!!"

Irnoma closed her mouth, and her eyes softened again. "Interesting answer… but **WRONG!**" Although her expression showed no anger, her voice boomed through the clearing. "What sorta cringe answer is that!? The correct answer's **NO! THERE IS NO POINT IN ASKING YOUR QUESTION!!**" She turned swiftly around and started walking back into the forest. "Complete those finishers yourself. I trust ya can do so."

I waited for her to disappear into the forest before finally relaxing from my stance and sat down to stretch my arms. So not even she would give any answer. Does that mean I would just have to wait? I was already starting to lose my patience after all these weeks of physical training.

It wasn't all that bad, though. While half of each day was dedicated to training, the other half I had to myself. Irnoma didn't give me much to pass my time with, but I still had the freedom to roam around the never-ending forest.

When I finished stretching, I walked back into the forest, away from the blazing summer heat I didn't even notice anymore. After strolling through the trees for a while, I arrived at my destination: the place I now called home.

Irnoma, being the worst teacher in the entire universe, had only given me a sleeping bag and some basic tools, telling me to go live by myself in the wild. In the past two months, I had managed to build a small structure out of branches and leaves that somewhat resembled a tent, but to be honest, it's enough to get through the nights.

The first few weeks of living in the wilderness, however, were a nightmare. I couldn't fall asleep in the cold darkness at night, afraid of any small sounds made by nocturnal animals. And when I did manage to fall asleep, I would wake up countless times every night, making me drowsy during the day as Irnoma forced me to do intense workouts.

Now, I've already gotten used to everything, and I feel like I could be thrown anywhere and still manage to live. To some degree, I was thankful to my master for putting me through such harsh conditions. But on the other hand, I despised her for all this. Why couldn't I live in a nice house if I was already training myself to death during the day? I deserved some sort of reward, didn't I? I had asked her those questions before, but, just as the question I had asked today, I received no answers.

I rummaged through a small pile of random objects in my tent and produced a short knife. This knife was given to me by Irnoma just two weeks ago when my old blade broke in half, but it was already starting to dull.

With my knife in hand, I traveled back out. Although it looked like this forest was only covered in trees for miles upon miles, there were some fascinating landmarks I've encountered during my daily morning runs. They were scattered about the forest, and it seemed like new ones were always appearing. When I had asked Irnoma about them, she had only told me that she had made those places out of pure boredom.

Not too far from my home, there was a small but deep puddle with glowing fish at the bottom where the sun couldn't reach. Further up North sat a group of large rock structures that resembled the stone henge. To the East past the river, there was a large lake that was only a few inches deep, allowing trees to grow in the water, hiding the water from a birds-eye view.

Just a few days ago, I had found a small marsh inhabited by wild boars. I decided to travel there again to explore a bit more. I mean, there isn't really much else to do in this forest with the same repeating trees spanning for miles upon miles.

When I arrived at the marsh, the sun was still high in the sky. I had plenty of time to look around before I had to head back for the dinner Irnoma prepared for me every day. (At least she isn't forcing me to do *everything* on my own)

This place was a large circular clearing in the forest with a few short old trees scattering the open space. Instead of being covered in the usual bright green grass like the rest of the forest, the ground was filled with wet mud. I crinkled my nose at the strong smell of nature. I had been living in the wild for weeks now, and I thought I'd gotten used to the scent of wood and dirt, but this place was something else.

The many boars in the marsh were either sleeping or rolling around in the mud. They had seemed peaceful when I first saw them, but I brought my knife just in case. I had never stepped into their territory before, so I had to be careful and prepared. I took my first step into the clearing, my boot sloshing into the mud, and glanced around at each of the wild pigs. None of them had seemed to notice me. I was safe… for the time being.

As I continued taking steps through the mud, keeping as quiet as the wet ground allowed me, I stayed vigilant. That was something I had learned in my time in the forest after the incident with the kirrels. Those squirrels came at me in nightmares, and I had always been looking out for them since.

When I finally reached the closest dead tree in the marsh, I leaned into it and sighed in relief. This was my first checkpoint, but I stayed conscious of my surroundings.

In the tree corpse was a hole, revealing that it was hollow. I slowly peeked in to see what was inside. Light from the open top of the log revealed a small group of cute animals huddled at the bottom. Were those baby boars?

But before I could continue admiring the cute furry creatures, my ears caught a disturbance, and I pulled my head out. To my left, one of the boars was running straight in my direction. I let out a yelp in shock and turned to run, only to realize that I had stood by the tree for too long, and my boots were stuck to the ground. My lazy work in tying my shoelaces came back at me, and my feet left the shoes as I started running.

When I looked up after being distracted by my feet, I came face to face with another boar coming at me in full force. It was already too late to dodge, so I put my arms in front of me to protect my vital spots and received the ram in full force. I grabbed onto the boar's body and rode it through the wet marsh. Its head swung violently, trying to fling me off.

I looked behind me and realized that we were heading straight into a tree at the edge of the clearing. Before any further thought, I took out my knife and sent its tip directly into the boar's shoulder.

The sound of tearing flesh came clearly through my ears, and blood gushed out. The boar slowed a little but was still running at the tree, so I yelled out frantically and pulled my knife out to send several more stabs into its shoulders. After the fifth stab, the boar finally tripped and collapsed. We landed just an arm's reach from the tree.

It took me a few moments to come back to my senses and realize the rest of the boars were still coming to kill me. I quickly stood up and ran into the forest. After just a few large steps, I tripped on a rock and fell to the ground. When I promptly turned around onto my back to look behind me, I saw that the boars had stopped chasing me. Instead, they had formed a group around the boar I had wounded, examining the limp but still hardly breathing body.

I slowly crawled behind a tree and leaned back, still breathing heavily. After looking down at my hands, my head became light as I saw them covered in blood. The sound of the tearing flesh and the sight of the gushing blood came back to me. I was immediately sent back two months ago to the scene of the school shooting. I remembered the sound of tearing flesh, the sight of blood gushing, all from my own shoulders.

When those thoughts came to me, my hands went to my shoulders by themselves, covering my clothes in fresh blood. What had I just done? I know I was just defending myself, but that boar had kids. I didn't have to stab it, right? I could have just jumped off the animal and ran away. Why did my mind go straight to using the knife?

Dropping the small blade and leaving it behind, I walked back to my home slowly, looking at my trembling red hands the entire way.