Holding Back

Chapter 46. Holding Back

As she stared at the retreating back of the boy, her panic returned. She had almost relaxed by the end of their conversation, and wouldn't lie that she hadn't enjoyed flirting with him, that she hadn't felt proud seeing his reaction after exposing her breasts. But when he confessed that he knew the Creator, all the calmness left her, replacing it with dread, filling her with apprehension.

What was Creator planning?

While she had gotten a basic understanding of the character of this Harry Potter, and realised that he wasn't some cruel sadist bastard, it still wasn't enough to alleviate her disquiet.

Was Harry Potter just a pawn to Creator? Or was he something more? How did they know each other? What was their relationship?

He had seemed reasonable enough. But would Harry behave the same if the Creator asked him to do something?

She didn't know how much to trust him. She didn't know how safe she was after this promise of non-aggression. She wished he had waited and answered her questions. Then she would have been able to sleep. But with the way her mind was running after hundred different thoughts, she didn't think she could rest.

After apparating near the carriage, she put on the Invisibility Charm and sneaked into it. As she stood before her room, she noticed the lights spilling from the door beside hers.

It was Fleur's room.

And she finally focussed on one thing.

'Fleur is captivated by Harry's beauty, unaware of the danger he is hiding behind his innocuous smile. I don't think it's a wise idea for her to get entangled in this mess. She will only get hurt by being near him. And she might even gain the Creator's attention. I can't let that happen.'

Having made up her mind, she knocked on the door.

"Who?"

"It's me, Fleur." She responded.

The door opened on its own. And she stepped inside.

She could see Fleur's taste in the room. Everything was white. And pristine and clean. The bed sheets, the curtains, the walls. Everything. And there was an order to everything. Books were where they should be. Clothes were where they should be. Everything was in its proper place.

The bed was placed beside the window, and the curtain closed. Fleur was slouched in the bed with a book opened in her lap. And she was garbed in just white shorts and a t-shirt, and had her hair down, leaving her beautiful limbs exposed.

Eos couldn't help but give her beautiful body an appreciative glance. There was no lust in her gaze but just pure admiration. And while she didn't swing that way, she would confess that she would have been all over her if she wasn't a woman.

Unfortunately, she was a woman.

"Madam Blanc?" Fleur questioned with raised eyebrows, noticing her wandering eyes.

Offering her a brimming smile, and hiding her nervousness, she walked up to her and plopped down beside her student.

"It's past midnight, Fleur. You should be sleeping." said Eos.

"I was just going to. Just finished reading a spellbook. Do you want something, madam?" Fleur said, shifting a little so she could face her.

Eos grimaced, trying to find words that wouldn't be taken the wrong way. "Are you by any chance interested in Harry Potter?"

Fleur's eyes widened and she sat up straight. "Not really. While I haven't seen someone as beautiful as him, I didn't get the opportunity to converse with him, to see who he really is."

Eos nodded. "Good. Then please don't try to find an opportunity to talk to him, Fleur. He is a dangerous boy. Someone even more powerful than me. Keep away from him. He is trouble."

Her heart sank as Fleur's eyes glimmered with more interest. "More powerful than you?"

"Fleur. Believe me when I say that you don't want to get close to him. I know some of his secrets that I can't reveal to you. Just trust me on this. Stay away from that boy. Please." Eos almost begged seeing how her interest just kept on growing with each word instead of decreasing.

Fleur must have felt her desperation, because she scooted closer and took her in her arms, surprising her. She wasn't unaware of Fleur's thoughts about her, knowing that the girl didn't look at her promiscuity in a good light. So, she was expectedly astonished at the act of affection, having concluded that Fleur Delacour just tolerated her because she wanted to learn from her.

But it seemed she had been wrong.

Eos melted in the embrace. It was her first hug that didn't come from Voldemort. She felt warmth blossom in her heart and travel to each part of her body. It was this sensation she had been chasing since the day she ran away from that fortress.

She had thought that only sex would bring her this warmth. So, she had fucked and fucked to bask in the fleeting warmth. But for the first time in her life, she found something even better than sex, something even more evocative than bodily pleasures.

She bit back a whine when Fleur pulled back and looked at her softly. "Are you alright, madam? Was Harry Potter the reason for your melancholic mood?"

"I'm fine now, Fleur. Just please be safe and stay away from Harry Potter." Eos smiled warmly, ignoring her second question.

Fleur caught it but didn't call her out. "As you say, madam."

Standing up, she moved towards the door, a lightness in her steps, and her worries lessened considerably.

"Goodnight, Fleur."

"Goodnight, madam."

~xXxXx~

"Are you two sure about this?" Hermione asked, her voice laced with concern as she looked between them.

"We are, Hermione. Don't give your pretty head a migraine." He smiled reassuringly for the umpteenth time while Daphne just rolled her eyes, getting fed up with the same question.

The couple was walking hand-in-hand with their friends crowded around them.

It was noon and their group was moving towards the Great Hall at a sedate pace for lunch break, and to enter their names in the goblet. Well, only Harry and Daphne were going to do the latter.

Iris wasn't really concerned about the dangers of the tournament, being aware of how powerful Daphne and Harry truly were. Though, unlike the redhead, their friends showed different levels of concern in different ways.

Chirpy Tracey was quiet that day. Hermione was fussing around them and wringing her hands. Neville wore a mild frown. And Astoria had taken Daphne's other arm to keep hold of.

Their worry was understandable since none of them knew the duo's true worth. But by the end of the tournament, everyone would.

The Great Hall was still half-empty when they took their seats at the Gryffindor table. Seeing that it was still a while before the food would be served, Harry and Daphne shared a look and stood up from the bench.

She smiled as he interlaced their hands again, tugging her towards the goblet which was placed beside the platform on which the head table lay. Stopping before it, they nodded at each other, their excitement unconcealed for the moment. "Ready?"

"Ready." He affirmed.

And they took out the parchments from their pockets on which they had written their names neatly.

After dropping the parchments in the blue flame, they turned around and started for the Gryffindor table.

Daphne saw the polite smile Harry sent to the French Veela who nodded at them before hurrying towards the goblet. She thought she would have felt jealous that he was already showing interest in another girl, but she felt nothing. Maybe because she wasn't worried about her place in Harry's life anymore and knew there was no uncertainty.

Looking over her shoulder, she briefly glanced at the beautiful black-haired woman beside Professor Longbottom.

Eos Blanc. Or Voldemort.

Now, that was the pillar of uncertainty. Harry had told her and Iris that he had come to an understanding with the woman who was made from the soul of the Dark Lord, and that they weren't against each other anymore. But he had also told them to be careful around her, wanting them to be wary of her.

She could understand him and his worries. He was incredibly paranoid. But better be safe than sorry, and so she snapped her head back before Eos could sense her gaze. Daphne was uncertain whether there was really any danger from that woman. Still, she decided to follow her boyfriend's suggestion for now, not like she had any plans to acquaint herself with her anyway.

Sitting back beside Astoria, because her little sister still refused to give up her seat beside Harry's, she kept her silence while her friends talked about everything and nothing.

The Triwizard tournament would be interesting and exciting. She was eager to compete against Harry and finally start showing off her power. There was even a chance that she might win it since he was going to limit his strength so as not to make the competition boring.

She would be counting the days until the champions would be announced.

~xXxXx~

Harry stepped to his side, missing the pointed steel rod that flew to skewer him. He swiped his wand before him just as the loud clang rang inside the classroom, the steel rod striking the wall behind him before falling on the floor uselessly.

Alice rolled to her left and jumped to her feet, the ground beneath her opening up to swallow her whole. Smirking, she stabbed her wand forward, a blue jet of light screaming towards him, causing him to wince at the unpleasant noise. She grabbed the opportunity as he dodged but faltered a little, bringing her wand down with a grand flourish, resulting in deadly rocky spikes plunging down from the ceiling to turn him into a pincushion.

He immediately raised his unoccupied hand over his head and made a fist, the ground instantly rising to form a hemisphere around him, cocooning him inside just a second before the spikes could harm him. The room was filled with a loud cacophony of stone colliding on stone, breaking and screeching, smashing one another as the spikes broke against the protective cocoon.

"Evanesco." He mumbled.

A moment later, they all vanished. The stony barrier. And the rocky spikes. Leaving just him and her.

Harry stood facing his aunt, his wand pointed at her. He was smiling and she was smirking. Her smug grin just enhanced her beauty as she displayed a confident visage, her dark hair having spilled earlier from the bun due to the rigorous activity, framing her sweaty face. She would have cut an impressive figure if she hadn't been dressed in just a see-through black nighty that barely covered anything. Her oscillating tits, while she jumped around, had been just as effective as her skills. And the inappropriate amount of skin on display had been just as distracting.

This wasn't a duel. This wasn't a match of equals.

It was a chance for Alice to go all out and enjoy herself while he limited his strength to her level, allowing her to showcase her fighting style, allowing her to shine. If he really wanted to defeat her then he wouldn't have needed more than a second. But it was somewhat fun to fight handicapped and just use Transfiguration to match her pace. And it was rewarding enough to watch his sexy aunt bounce around in a skimpy outfit.

Following the session where she declared that she didn't have anything else to teach him, the duo had spent the Friday nights of October just duelling. And since she was unable to train him anymore, the roles were kind of reversed.

Now, their sessions benefitted her more than him as she fought against someone stronger, who could make her sweat and force her to sharpen her skills and fighting style. In this sense, he was training her instead of the other way around.

He grinned as hundreds of conjured silver swords rushed towards him, his aunt already preparing another spell to keep him busy. With a flick of his wand, a giant glass barrier rose before him, big enough to join the ceiling and the floor with its ends, and then he mumbled a spell, turning the glass barrier into something unique.

Instead of shattering the glass, the swords passed through the barrier without noise, and lost their momentum, turning into a swarm of lily petals, gently fluttering down and infusing the room with its sweet floral scent, filling it up to the brim, the fragrance clinging to the walls and windows.

Alice stopped short at the beautiful display.

She was in awe, staring at the enormous sheet of ornate transparent glass, and the hundreds of lily petals floating around on the other side, obscuring him from her view.

She yelped as the white petals stopped their gentle dance and suddenly shot towards her like arrows, breaking through the glass barrier and raining pieces of sharp glass, approaching her angrily, seeking to bury her beneath the sea of white.

Mimicking Harry's earlier move, she raised her wand and the floor rose with her to form a hemisphere around her, capturing her into a protective cocoon as she was bombarded by the flurry of lilies.

She was panting in the darkness of her stony cocoon, breathing loudly through her mouth, realising that she didn't have much energy to spare. Unlike Harry, she neither had the near-infinite amount of mana nor the monstrous stamina.

Deciding to end the losing battle, she reluctantly vanished the stony cocoon and was met with the sight of white lily petals blanketing the entire floor. Snapping her gaze to the other side, she was ready to give her all for one attack that would surprise Harry and may even win her the match.

But she didn't get the chance.

His wand was trained at the nape of her neck and he tapped it. "Yield?"

Apparently, the couple of seconds she spent huddled in the barrier was enough for him to close the distance between them.

She could hear the smirk in his voice. And it reminded her of their first session where he had humbled her and defeated her in an instant. At least tonight she was able to put up some sort of fight. That had to count for something.

She dropped her wand on the floor and raised her hands in surrender. "I yield— not!" Saying that she spun around and tried to sweep him off his feet, her laughter bubbling around them. But just like the last time, he evaded her physical attack.

He chuckled, stepping back and getting into a fighting stance. "You don't want to do this, aunty."

But she just smirked and leapt forward, letting her fist fly at his face. He parried the blow easily with his left hand and moved in for a counterattack.

Grabbing her shoulders, he hooked his leg behind hers and gave a firm shove.

She gasped, stumbling.

Thankfully for her, Harry didn't want to hurt her so he slowed her fall and held her shoulders until she was lying safely on her back down on the carpet of soft lily petals, the sweet aroma of the flowers clogging their noses.

"Yield?" He mumbled amusedly, looming over her, squeezing her shoulders, his eyes shifting between her panting lips and heaving chest.

She glowered at him, not wanting to concede defeat.

"Yield!" She suddenly squeaked when he pulled down the thin noodle straps of her nighty down her elbows.

Alice bit back a moan as he placed his hands over her large bra-clad bust and squeezed it. She froze when he buried his face and nose in her cleavage, his tongue darting out to lick the sweat off her skin.

She could have stopped him.

She could have encouraged him.

But she did nothing and lay there with her eyes averted while he groped her lustfully and rubbed his face on her soft flesh, his fingers sinking and clawing the wide expanse of her firm round breasts.

He stopped and let out an annoyed sigh. Cupping her chin, he made her look at his irritated face.

"Do you want me to stop?"

"I don't understand what you're saying, Harry." She mumbled with a fake smile, acting oblivious.

The look he gave was a mixture of anger and incredulity. "Are you still turning a blind eye to what I'm doing?"

"What is happening, love?" She questioned quizzically, a benign smile adorning her face, still acting ignorant. Though she didn't know how long she could keep it up when he angrily tore off her bra and allowed her breasts to bounce out in the open, his gaze transfixed on her big jiggling boobs.

"Well then, let's see what your limit is, aunty." He spoke with bared teeth, his annoyance clear in his tone, totally not appreciating her games.

"I don't know what you're talking about. I'm just resting on the bed of lilies with my lovely godson." She said, biting her lip when he took hold of her exposed tits and fondled them roughly. Her breath hitched in her throat when his thumbs circled around her big pink areolas, when they pressed down on her stiff nipples.

Her eyes widened when he mumbled some spell and her breasts became… fuller, for lack of a better term. Consider her bamboozled when he lowered his face and clamped his mouth over her nipple, his other hand grabbing her spare boob to keep it occupied.

She shuddered, feeling something leave her chest and flow down his mouth as he greedily sucked on her tit, as his tongue licked and flicked her erect nipple. Squirming, she couldn't help but put her palms around her head and hold him closer to her chest while he feasted. Alice was aware of the Lactation Charm but didn't know why and how Harry knew about it. That spell wasn't something people accidentally stumbled upon.

Pushing away those thoughts, she enjoyed the warm sensation.

She hadn't felt this in more than a decade. Since her brave husband had died while protecting them. It was his face in her mind that made her feel guilty for getting aroused by this, for wanting this. For wanting this boy to make her scream.

As she became wetter, as she rubbed her thighs against each other, as the heat grew and grew in her core, as she squished her godson's face on her bosom, she began crying silently, tears rolling down her cheeks while milk spurted out of her tits.

She wanted this.

She didn't want this.

She was confused. On one hand, she hadn't had this much fun ever. But this fun, this pleasure was an ugly betrayal to the love she still bore for her dead husband.

She wanted Harry.

But she didn't want to betray her dear husband.

It was this that made her hesitant to either fully accept Harry's advances or decline them. She should have slapped him the first time he dared to grope her bum, she should have drawn a boundary then and explained to him how wrong his desire was.

But she hadn't. She had been first amused, then flattered, and then extremely aroused. It had gotten increasingly bad after that first time. His hands had begun wandering confidently and her clothes had gotten sluttier and sluttier to enchant the horny boy.

She liked it. This flirty game. Where she flaunted her body and got off on the pride she felt after making her handsome godson hard for her. The groping she had accepted and ignored, to a certain extent, not wanting to give him free rein, but neither wanting him to stop.

All because she loved this game.

She also never talked about it with him, ignoring what was going on between them, not giving it a term, keeping it under a limit so she couldn't truly betray her dead husband. But as he suckled on her tit and demanded her to choose between betraying and committing fully to him, she was ashamed to not have the will to stop him.

'I'm sorry, Frank.' She thought, moaning hoarsely as he carefully pulled on her nipple with his teeth. But the pleasure abruptly stopped when her godson heard her sniffles.

He pulled back and looked horrified at seeing her tears. "Aunty?"

She wiped her eyes quickly, sitting up and clutching him as he hugged her back.

She pressed her face on his chest as he held her quietly, losing himself in his guilt and confusion. He hadn't meant for this to happen. Not having wanted to see her cry. He just wanted her to clear up what was happening between them, wanting to know if his efforts had been wasted or not. Wanting to know if he should really quit it and leave her alone.

"What is it, aunty? Why are you being so vague? Just tell me if you don't want me to do this. It's not like I'll force myself on you. Just say no." He mumbled, trying his best not to let his annoyance leak into his voice.

Alice pulled back and shook her head. "It's not that, Harry. I… like what is happening between us even though I know it's wrong. But I just can't bring myself to either fully commit to this or to remain a faithful widow. I love Frank, and I don't want to disappoint him if we ever meet in the afterlife, if there is even such a thing. But I also want to finally have sex. To finally feel some intimacy. To finally experience the pleasure course through my veins. I just can't choose."

And that was the truth, wasn't it?

Since the death of her husband, she had been alone in bed, not having the courage to move on with her life, not wanting to turn her back on the love she held for Frank. She had accepted that she would remain alone, that she would never get to ride the thrill of sex again, but once Harry started showing his interest, once he started touching her, she was forced to remember the good nights she shared with her deceased husband. And once she remembered, she couldn't let go of it. Seeking it again, but not. Wanting it again, but not. It was a painful conundrum. Desiring something wrong.

Harry wouldn't have been her first choice to have sex with. He was her son in all but name. Lying with him would be like sleeping with her Neville. Which made her green with disgust. But he was the only one whose advances she could entertain, the only one who she could trust and attain. And the way he had quickly grown into a young man had allowed her to ignore the icky parts of him being her son.

Harry held her by the shoulders and shot her a fond look, impressed by her loyalty. "It is not like anyone can or will replace Uncle Frank. You should do what you want to do, aunty, and should stop overthinking. You are still so young. You have so much time. Restraining yourself because of something that could happen after death is stupid."

She saw him think something before continuing in a serious tone. "And honestly, you're not going to die. You're going to become immortal with all the others. There won't be any afterlife for you. So, stop holding back."

Alice was dumbfounded and could only utter, "What?"

He sighed, taking a deep breath. "You know that I've many secrets that I can't reveal. One of them is that we all will become immortal. Me, you, Neville, Iris, Mum, Aunt Proseprina, Daphne, Tori, Tracey, Sirius, Remus, and maybe even Hermione. Don't ask me why and how, I can't answer that. That's why I'm saying you should stop worrying about death and the afterlife and all that crap."

That just made her more confused, but she believed him, having already seen how mysterious and extraordinary he was. "But what if I don't want to become immortal? Won't I have a choice?"

He looked at her as if she was stupid. "Why wouldn't you want to become immortal? There are like an infinite number of worlds out there to explore. Wouldn't you want to live forever and experience new things? Wouldn't you want to travel through different unknown worlds?"

She could see the advantage in that with the way he put it, resisting the urge to scream about infinite worlds, not having known about that.

Who wouldn't want to be forever young and live without an end? Who wouldn't like to explore strange new worlds? Though a part of her still disliked the idea of abandoning Frank, she still wanted to die sometime and meet her husband if possible.

As if reading her thoughts, he explained the simple truth. "I don't want to belittle what you had with Uncle Frank. But the truth is that you and he were always temporary. You see, a living being is made up of three things. Body, Soul, and Mind. I won't go into the details, but after death, Mind and Soul merge temporarily, the time period ranging from a couple of years to decades. This time period is what you'll call an 'afterlife' where you'll be rewarded or punished for what you did in your life.

"But once your Soul cleans itself, once your Mind is removed from the Soul by either contentment, that comes after the reward, or resignation and acceptance, that comes after the punishment, the Soul will become blank, losing its memories and the sense of identity. And once that happens, the soul is plucked away from the afterlife and reborn into a new being in a new world. It's a cycle of life and death. That's what happens when you die. You cease to exist but your soul doesn't and sometime later your soul reincarnates with a new identity.

"So, don't you want to remain Alice Longbottom forever? Don't you want to remain with us for all eternity?"

In the silence that followed he looked at her expectantly while her eyes were wide and she stared at the truth, as she looked at the thirteen-year-old boy who changed her view of the world and its workings. She knew it would be futile to ask him how he knew all this, so she didn't.

She nodded slowly. "I see. I think I need some time to get my head straight. You have given me a lot to think of."

He smiled softly, expertly hiding his disappointment as he helped her to her feet. "Okay then. Goodnight, aunty."

"Goodnight, love." She whispered idly, embracing him, her mind too cloudy to think straight, to notice that she was still half-naked and flushed against him.

The kiss wasn't unexpected, yet it still caught her off guard.

For the first time, she kissed him back when his lips met hers, groaning as his hands ran over her naked sides, on her soft warm skin before finding her voluptuous breasts, fondling them passionately. Shoving him away before they could get lost in the heat, she offered him an exasperated smile. "Soon. But not now."