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The One My Heart Seeks

"Why do I get a feeling that I have seen here somewhere before?" Xavier Carter is a guy who is having difficulty in living because of a complicated family problem. Receiving an inexplicably large amount of hate from his family that he does not even know why all he ever loved was one woman. The woman whom he had gotten the love he deserves. Little did he know, that after many years of not seeing each other, something bad has happened. Tragic news came his way and found out that the person he gets affection from is already gone. He continued living his life of misfortune, thinking that it is fine. But deep in his heart, he still seeks for the attention and affection that his mother gave him. Everything changed, when one day, he saw a vision of a woman. A woman that will change his view of life. A woman that he seeks.

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183 Chs

First Court Trial

After the opening proceedings of each side, the prosecutor starts with his opening statement for examining the evidence. Then the prosecutor started presenting his evidence to the court.

Following him is the lawyer defending my side, shown the evidence she gathered. There was also a witness she was able to invite.

When the presentation of the evidence ended, the trial proceeded to the questioning of the defendants and the witnesses. The side of my half brothers was the first to be given the platform. Everything was going smoothly when suddenly, the prosecutor started to question irrelevant things to the question.

A witness from their side entered and was questioned.

"You said that you saw the offender beating up students outside of the house where my client is staying?" the prosecutor asked their witness.

"Objection, your honor, the question is not relevant to the case of my client," my lawyer responded, objecting to the relevancy of the question to the case being discussed.

"Overruled. Proceed with the questioning," the decision of the judge shocked the entire room, but they proceeded.

The unfair decision of the judge shocked everyone inside the court on the objection. It was clearly irrelevant to the case, but the judge didn't accept the protest. The prosecutor added questions that don't have any basis. I fumed with anger when the one being questioned answers with speculations.

"Stop lying because you dont know what really happened that day," I yelled inside, which scared everyone inside.

The judge struck his gavel to regain the order inside. After the unfair decision of the judge to every objection, the next to be questioned is or witness. However, after minutes have passed, the witness that was supposed to be in question is nowhere to be found. Which made my first trial suffer an unlawful loss.

When I looked at my half-brothers looking at me mockingly, my temper rose up, and my hidden frustrations appeared.

"I paid you just to let me lose. What the hell is wrong with you? Are you stupid? You call this defending my innocence? I suffered a great deal of loss because of your stupidity," I yelled at the face of my lawyer angrily.

After the first trial, they brought me back to the station, then back to my cell. Inside my cell, I started getting violent, throwing things inside. Punching the walls, shouting inside to release my frustrations. One officer transferred me again to the darkroom, then told me to chill out.

The trial ended this afternoon, but the anger I felt when my step-siblings looked at me, smiling like they already won, made me irritated. Things are getting a lot out of hand, and everything that kept me on moving forward started to disappear.

Inside the darkroom, you cannot see anything, not even a simple bed nor a window. People call this the torture room for people awaiting trial, but the way every police officers does not give the same treatment to others added fuel to my hatred.

(I'm going to kill all of you once I leave here)

While inside the room, I tried to meditate and control my anger when suddenly someone entered then started to beat me up. I was so frustrated that I didn't let this pass through. The person who entered did not expect that I'll fight back.

Since I can't see the face of the person, I slammed its head on the door that alerted the entire station. When they opened the door, many of them beat me up with their baton. My body handled every hit, but then they tased me, which made me unconscious.

In my sleep, nightmares kept on hunting me without any reason. I kept on seeing myself turn into a monster, someone with the eyes of a cold-blooded murderer. Then I saw myself being shot in the back while protecting a woman.

After being shot, I saw her face, but it wasn't clear enough for me to determine who she was. I didn't know what it was but seeing these nightmares scared the life out of me. When I woke up, I was back in my cell, but I dont remember anything that happened to me yesterday.

The last thing that I can recall is the time before the trial starts.

"Hey, Kid. Someone is here to see you," the guard told me.

"May I ask the name of the visitor?" I responded politely.

I can see from the face of the guard that he was creeped out, but I can't seem to find enough reason for him to be spooked.

"He said his name is Augustine. Will you accept his visit or not?" the guard responded to my question.

"Yes, please wait for a moment. But can I use the comfort room just for a sec? " I responded.

"Okay, but remember that I'll be watching you," he agreed to let me use the comfort room.

Inside the comfort room, I took off my shirt, and I can still hardly believe that my body has many wounds and scars. Some were too deep, and some were too simple, like a scratch of a cat. Before heading out to meet Augustine, I cleaned up myself because he will overthink that I am mistreated here.

Although the treatment I receive from the officers is indeed different from the others. When I washed my face and looked in the mirror, I was terrified when I saw a glimpse of myself bleeding in the reflection of the mirror. I didn't give it much thought because it must be my mind playing games with me.

I head out to meet Augustine, but I thought he was alone. My boss came along with him and when I asked why they were here. They responded with a question if I am alright.

(Woah, these two are a weird bunch)

"Oh yeah, what happened to the trial yesterday? Did we win? Can I finally leave this place?" I asked enthusiastically.

They looked at me as if they were dumbfounded by what I said. But I definitely don't remember anything after I was brought to the court for the trial. However, that was the last thing I can remember. And then, voila, I woke up inside my cell.

"What the hell are you talking about, Xavier? You were with us yesterday, and I am pretty sure that you knew what happened because you threw a fit outside of the courtroom," Augustine responded. But the look on their faces is something new.

"What fit? I dont quite understand you. I thought that they only brought me to the court, but I dont remember anything that I entered the courtroom," they have that look on their faces that my response shocked them.

"What's with your reactions?" I added, questioning their reaction.

"Don't you remember what you did yesterday to your lawyer?" my boss suddenly added with a question.

"The hell, I believe that our first meeting was here. But I dont remember anything about her after that?" I responded, still dumbfounded by their reactions.

(What the hell? Why are they looking at me like that? It's starting to get creepy, you know)

"Xavier, are you really okay? You can tell us anything if you have troubles here," my boss asked.

"Why wouldn't I be okay? You know what, I'm getting tired with this question-and-answer portion. If you can't explain anything to me, then both of you might as well just leave, but thanks for visiting me. It somehow gave me encouragement, thanks. Oh, Augustine, if you dont mind, will you please help her in running the store? Thank you again," I replied and came back to my cell.

(Wasted my time for nothing, what the hell was that?)

I dont know what is clearly happening, but my mind is showing me visions of me dying. Many possible ways of dying at the hands of someone while being held by a girl crying. A woman who is grieving for my death.

The only thing I can do is to sleep, but eventhough in my sleep, these visions kept on hunting me in my dreams. From every time that I was shot in my dreams, the pain kept on flowing through my body. Not physically, but it attacks my mentality.

There is not a time for me living in a cell that I didn't suffer. Being beaten by officers in the darkroom by midnight. Mental health being target by nightmares circulating in my mind. And even my emotional stability is starting to get affected by these nightmares.

For the past few weeks, I tried to hold on because I thought that justice will be handled fairly. But because of that, I realized that I was just a stupid idealist believing that everything will be alright.

I was too dumb to believe the hope they told me, that false hope which made me trust every word they make. However, I accepted the fact that I am living in a cruel world without any regard for people without influence.

Being treated like garbage, I'm done with all this nonsense. I will make them pay for making my life miserable.

Dear Reader,

Creation is hard, cheer me up!

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