Not Generous

NOWEL

It is him. Or am I seeing things? Is that Michael being possessed by a demon or...

I give up! Why is this so hard to figure out? Was Michael possessed or I was just hallucinating?

"Are you alright now, Princess Nowel?" Adranus asked me with concern on his face, and I gave him a nod. The bitter truth is that I can never be alright after my brief encounter with that frightening demon from Hell. It's hard for me not to still feel paranoid about it.

I scratched my head hard as I tried to solve the mystery. But what other way to get answers than to confront him myself?

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MICHAEL

I. Am. Doomed.

How in the world did she recognize who I was? Did I make it too obvious for her? I guess she also remembers how I heroically saved her life from that balcony that night.

And...the biting of her neck thing?

Oh, I shouldn't have acted on my urges to end her life during the invasion. I should have used that opportunity to run or disappear rather than strangle her in my demon form.

I sighed as I palmed my forehead. I just hope that she doesn't remember the part where I sank my fangs into her fragile skin and sucked the life out of her. If so, then I'll have a lot of explaining to do!

I sighed again in frustration as I thought of ways to avoid the forthcoming interrogation. Would she expose me to the royal court and place herself as a witness to my demonic activities? She has seen me in my true form and I have given her solid evidence that I am truly what they all thought I was.

I should have stayed quietly in the slave quarters, or better yet, escaped while those bastards invaded the castle.

Urgh!

This is all my fault! What am I to do now?

"Nothing." Levi said as he took a seat beside me and I wondered what he meant by 'nothing.'

"What do you mean by that?"

He became silent as he adjusted himself in his sitting position.

"The expression on your face told me that you are struggling and trying to figure out what to do or not to do. So, I suggest you do nothing?"

"Nothing?"

He nodded. "Just nothing and relax." I blanked at how he was being so unhelpful with his puzzling words. "Not everyone loses it after knowing what you truly are."

I scoffed. They are not yet sure of what I am and they are ready to crucify me.

"Just calm down and take in deep breaths. And let everything work out just the way it should."

Wait!

'Knowing what you truly are?' I froze. Does he also know that I am not ordinary?

He left my side to continue with his duties. Leaving me stunned and more confused. I hate it when certain people act mysterious.

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I hate this moment. The way she's staring at me. I hate it. There was silence between us as we stared at each other on her balcony. The cold chills from the rain outside did not help either. I wish to be in any other situation than this.

"So...You are a demon. A real-life demon?"

I sighed. "Correction, I have a demon living in me."

She frowned in confusion, and I think I have to make it even clearer to her so that she can understand what I am saying.

"It's like a relationship...for instance. I am its host and the demon is the parasite. It lives in me."

"What kind of relationship would I call it? Is it mutual?"

How am I supposed to know? How am I able to explain what I do not understand?

Am I the same person but with a humanoid and a demonic form? Or am I a different entity sharing the same energy or form with a darker, different, and extremely dangerous entity? I'm so confused.

Even I do not understand what I am and made of.

My mom used to tell me that I am much more and a beautiful product of an abomination created by nature herself.

What could that be? I usually ask.

When the time comes you will understand. Was her usual reply.

I am fed up with not knowing who or what I am and how dangerous or weak I could be. It's upsetting.

"I think?"

She nodded while folding her lips into a thin line. I could feel her nervousness.

Nervous about what?

"Will it be okay by you If I consider you human than being one...harmless creature from hell?"

Harmless creature from hell? Is she mocking us?

My demon is very much displeased by what she thought of him. He is never weak or harmless. What sort of ridiculous thing is this?

"Why?" I challenged.

She swallowed hard. She is killing me right now. Why does she want to ignore the fact that I am or have a demon living in me?

"You see...the thing is...there are some people desperately waiting for a conviction that you truly are a demon or a demon lives in you, and I'm not good at keeping secrets or identities. It's better if I ignore the demon aspect of you...just to protect you and keep you safe. The royal court must not find out about this. They could hurt you...or do something worse.''

I couldn't move a muscle at what she uttered next. I felt strangely warm and touched. She's the first creature on earth who wants to protect me even after knowing what I am.

I became disturbed.

"You can't protect me. I protect myself. I've always depended on myself for everything. Whoever you see me as, whether a demon or a human is never my business. I simply do not care how you see me as long as you don't get involved with me and my business. I'll be fine." And I turned to leave.

"Michael!"

I stopped and balled my fists hard enough to make my palms red. "What?"

"I will protect you whether you like it or not."

"I don't care." I rolled my eyes.

She fell silent. I could feel her heart beating fast. She grabbed my hand and I was repulsed by how I felt when she did.

"Before you leave, thank you so much for saving my life the other night. I appreciate it a lot."

I removed my hands from her hold and, "Don't thank me. You would be dead if it weren't for my demon. I am not that generous."

Without explaining myself any further I left her room and straight to the slave quarters.

God! What did I just mean? That my demon is more merciful than me? Could that even be possible?