"God damnit, this is not what adventures are supposed to be like," Jack grumbled as he pushed away the countless paparazzi. Tiny-Sparkles, the unicorn suffering from dwarfism and the Jolly Ranchers first mate, snorted in agreement - though its snort sounded like crystal bells ringing, and glitter flew out of its nose.
Its' clear dissatisfaction was lost on the paparazzi, though, who could not get enough of the sparkling tiny horse and kept taking photographs with their old school cameras.
"No good deed goes unpunished, captain," said Ollie, who was seething with jealousy over the attention the unicorn was getting.
The crystal alligator, though, was just looking around curiously. It did not understand what was happening.