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The Greatest Joke

You are so bored that you decided to check out this book. What else can be done out of boredom? Do you think that boredom can be a fundamental force of some sort? This story is about characters with boredom at the bottom of their hearts, about their actions and their consequences. "The joke doesn't really work when you take it seriously. Life is hard to manage when you think that it's priceless. Imagine that it's worthless as a pebble for a second. It's much easier to handle the pebble than the infinitely valuable treasure, right?" A.N: This novel has a complex and unique power system that I created by combining my favorite aspects from a variety of different genres with my imagination. Also I'm trying to make all of my characters enjoyable to watch, so don't hesitate and check out my work!

Deantor · Fantasi
Peringkat tidak cukup
14 Chs

The conference (1)

'Well, it seems like I am alive due to a mercy of fate. Again. How could I forget about the thermal deformation? But to be fair, I didn't expect the room to be in the void or something. There were no stars or anything. Heh, seems like I almost got out of bounds.'

'Also where am I? The teleportation isn't instant?'

The state in which he was right now was quite unique. He didn't see the darkness or light, he... Didn't see. At all.

'So that's what blind people experience. It's not dark. Just nothing. I wasn't able to imagine that before...'

'Am I ok? Am I being punished for destroying the room? If so, this mysterious guy is really petty. Like, you can make a machine that prints matter out of nothing, you can make more rooms suspended in the void. That, or I'm just oblivious to the fact that it can be an actual technology instead of magic.'

'Am I being transported at all? Maybe I'm just dying and it's a dream. Nah, not again'

'I want to know what's going on around me!'

At this moment an image of a flesh of turquoise light appeared in his mind. A moment after he knew about a violet hand in his vicinity. He tried to look around or focus on the image, but it was gone. Like a state of clarity when you don't think about anything. As soon as you consciously notice it - you have lost it.

He saw the light and felt his body right after that

The young man squinted. The light after an absolute lack of vision was painful. But the eyes slowly adapted allowing him to observe the situation.

The young man was sitting in a comfortable office chair. There was long table made out of dark wood in front of him. There was a pretty looking girl sitting behind the table in front of him. She looked very lost.

"Are you the one behind my resurrection? Why did you do this and what do you want? Just for you to know: I won't pay for anything, I literally don't have anything to pay with"

The girl looked at him. Her facial expression changed few times. It shifted from fear to confusion to even deeper confusion.

"Oh so you are not the one in charge here. Well, tell me who are you working for then"

The young man told in a persuasive tone, regretting that he doesn't have a table lamp to point in her face, like they do in movies.

Girl's mouth opened as if she was about to say something, but stopped midway in disbelief.

The guy looked to the right. There was another guy looking at him back about one and a half meters away. He was sitting in the same office chair, looking dumbfounded.

After looking to the left he saw a girl. She was in the same position as the guy on the right with the same manifold of emotions on her face.

The guy stretched his neck upwards and looked around. The long blackwood table was flanked with office chairs from both sides. There seemed to be an equal amount of them, their positioning looked symmetrical. Each chair had a person sitting in it. All of them looked confused and flabbergasted.

'1, 2, 3, ... 19, I'm the 20th. 20 people: 10 guys 10 girls. Equality'

Looking around more the young man noticed that there was a 21st seat in the head of the table. It was empty. The office had no walls, just a floor that seemed to be an endless plain covered in linoleum. The end of it was unobservable due to the darkness.

'We are under a spotlight of some sort'

The guy looked at his hands. They seemed slightly unfamiliar under that bright light. Shifting his gaze to his chest he discovered a tie. All men seemed to be wearing one.

'They even tied a tie on me, how cute. I would not be able to do it in such a tidy manner myself'

He looked down on the way he was dressed. It seemed to be the same fit he had when he woke up in a waiting room. But there was one problem with that. It was exactly the same.

"The stole my sh*t!"

The guy exclaimed as he jumped out of his seat. His hands were desperately clapping his waist and hips.

'No machete, no belt, no resources. The scissors are gone too. Even a piece of a puzzle I took as a souvenir. Everything is gone.

All the other people looked at him in confusion. They were really perplexed by his behavior, but at the same time they realized that he must be in the same situation as them. His lack of fear and freedom of movement and self-expression were also slowly dragging them out of the stupor.

Few people have recovered enough to stand up too.

Suddenly a quiet sound of footsteps could be heard.

"Please take your seats, the conference is about to start"

Everyone turned their heads in the direction of sound. There was a man that was frivolously walking in their direction. He was really tall, around two meters. He was wearing a hawaiian shirt and shorts. Both of these pieces of clothing seemed to be out of the same collection because their design seemed to be very similar: a number of big unidentifiable violet flowers on a dark background. The first two buttons of a shirt were undone, revealing well defined chest muscles.

This slightly ominous man was also wearing flip-flops, which caused him to look slightly more ominous

His face was perfectly symmetrical and chiseled, as if he was an antique statue came to life. His hair was golden blonde, straight and short, but still really fluffy-looking. It was put to the side.

It was hard to see become of the light and shadows that it casted on his face, but his eyes seemed to be a vibrant violet color. Their effulgence from under the shadows made the presence of a man even more powerful.

The young man was following the movement of this extraordinary figure with his eyes as while slowly moving towards the chair. Other people silently took their seats.

The tall imposing person walked towards the place in the head of the table and fell into the chair, causing it to make a 720° spin.

"Hello, people. You seemed to be very lost, so I organized this meeting to dispell your confusion. Feel free to ask any questions you have about the situation you're in.

"Are you a God?" The young man asked instantly.

"It would not be unreasonable to use this word to describe me. Next question"

"Are you omnipotent?" The young man asked not even a second after.

"Technically no, practically yes"

"Give your omnipotence to me"

The one who can be reasonably described as god exhaled through his nose and slightly smiled. Other people seemed to be slightly scared of this gesture

"Why would I do that?"

"Because you're probably bored and that would be really exciting" The young man answered.

"That's a tempting offer you are making, but I already did something like that countless times. Not exciting enough." He said condescendingly.

"Why did you gather us here? And how are we alive?" One of the girls who looked very timid asked.

"Finally a relevant question, here take gold star for that."

The god snapped his fingers and an actual star-shaped piece of gold fell on the table in front of the girl. She picked it up curiously. He continued.

"You will participate in one of my entertainments, that's why I gathered you all here. If you are wondering why I brought you there after your death: I did it out of respect I have for the people who will be my entertainment. It would be rude to snatch you out of your daily life haphazardly. If you don't like the fact that you were resurrected, just tell me and I'll return you to the sweet embrace of nothingness."

Everyone went silent for a second. Before anyone could ask any further questions, one of the guys in the end of the table raised his hand

"Yes"

"Do it. Return me to the "sweet embrace of nothingness"."

The god put his thumb and middle finger together.

"Last chance to change your mind"

"Do it"

The guy said looking up, straight into the spotlight.

*Snap*

He disappeared instantly and without a trace. Other people seemed to be really disturbed by the view.

'Efficient'

The young man thought while looking on the empty seat. He felt slightly depressed.

"Well, he killed himself the first time he died. I gave him a chance, but it seems like he was really determined"

*Snap*

The new guy appeared in an empty seat. He started to move his arms vigorously, touching his chest, shoulders and face. He seemed to be terrified.

"Did you resurrect another one just now, or do you have a drawer of spare people?"

The young guy asked.

"A good question. There are slightly more than 20 people"

*snap*

The lighting changed. There was no more darkness. What seemed to be an endless plane of linoleum turned out to be an arena of some sort. It was around 100 meters in diameter, encircled by tribunes. Layers upon layers upon layers of tribunes. The Coliseum was a joke, a toy in comparison to that megastructure. There was so much tribunes that they were creating an optical illusion of a tsunami coming form all the directions at once. Over them, so high that it was uncomfortable to lift your head up to observe it, was a beautiful night sky. Almost all of it was occupied by a violet nebula with numerous cyan stars in it.

But that was not the thing that was attracting attention the most. The tribunes. They were filled by black mannequins. Thousands, thousands of mannequins. They vere completely still and so black that it was hard to see them as three-dimensional objects. But they were not fully black. The eyes. The eyes were absolutely human. And the moment the young man turned around to observe them they all moved. It was hard to notice such a miniscule movement that far away, but the human brain, that evolved to observe slightest changes of facial expressions and eye movements for millions of years made sure to register it.

The young man felt something he could only describe as "existential antipathy".

The same moment the god continued

"There are a hundred million of you. Well, minus one"