Rules are meant to be broken, aren't they?

Rules are meant to be broken.

But I can't break the one rule which threatens to break my long standing friendship with Jun Wook can I? No matter how much I'm attracted to his younger sister, I just can't act on it.

Because he has been with me since forever and however bad he may be in others' eyes, I can't do that to him. He's my only family as my sperm donor of a father has never been around ever since he made my mother pregnant (or so I was told) and my mother is never around the house; she's always travelling all around the world due to some business trip or the other so I'm stuck in an empty three bedroom apartment which my maternal grandparents left me and my mom after they died when I was around ten.

This is one of the reasons why I almost live at Jun Wook's house; have been doing since forever. His house is the only home I know and ever will. His warm and motherly mom who I call mom too is the only mom I've had in my life- I call my own mom 'mother' instead of 'mom'. His dad, who is a well-respected doctor in Daewoon is the only father figure I've ever had. And his sister is the only girl I've ever come close to liking in a romantic sense, not just the hormonal and horny I-can't-wait-to-get-in-your-pants sense.

Hence my internal dilemma; the war which wages inside my heart. Its a wonder I've held out for as long as I have

In my case, rules aren't meant to be broken. Rules can't be broken. Because the moment they are, everything will be over and not in a good way.

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"Jun Wook Oppa is not home." Ji Ah says with a small grin as she creaks open the door I was knocking on.

"But he called me to come over." I reply, frowning in confusion.

"Yeah, but he left an hour or so ago. Mom and dad are out too so it's just me." she shrugs and gestures for me to enter.

My heart starts to beat loudly at the statement but I brush all the thoughts running in my mind away. I shouldn't be like this, she is Jun Wook's sister- I remind myself as I can't the words 'Jun Wook's little sister' in my mind repeatedly.

"Want to drink something? Water? Juice?" she offers kindly, shifting on her feet as I take a seat on the cream colored sofa in her living room.

We both are seldom alone by ourselves and when that happens, I have this feeling that she feels awkward with me. Maybe it is because I avoid talking to her much, as I fear it will give away my feelings as she's always quick to notice things unlike her brother.

"Anything is fine." I reply but it comes off like a cold and curt answer and she nods with a small scowl, a 'V' appearing between her eyebrows.

Just like Jun Wook I know Ji Ah is short tempered too but never has she once lost her temper or got mad at me unlike other instances when she has shouted at others in our group or muttered curses at them under her breath and stormed off from the room in anger as Jun Wook teases her.

She brings me a glass of cold orange juice and places it in front of me on the glass coffee table and to my surprise, flops down beside me. She does leave space between us, sitting as far away as possible but it doesn't fail to make my heart skip a beat.

"Do you want to watch something?" she asks me softly; very much unlike the tone she uses with her brother in front of others and I nod silently, gazing at her from the corner of my eye.

Her hair isn't in a ponytail as usual today but a high bun piled on top of her head, messy tendrils escaping it and framing her face. She's wearing denim shorts and a loose white T-shirt, one whose shoulder keeps on drooping, a black strap peeking out from underneath it-I can't help but notice it when that happens as my heart rate increases.

She switches on Netflix and when I shake my head no when she asks me if I want to watch anything in particular, she puts on her favorite American sitcom I always find her bingeing.

I give up on trying to understand it in the middle and just focus on her chuckles whenever the actors say something funny, the way her button nose scrunches up, the way her plush red lips are turned up in amusement, the way she occasionally brushes the stubborn bangs away from her forehead...

I don't realise that during observing or rather staring at her, we subconsciously keep on edging closer and closer to each other for some strange reason.

When she suddenly pauses the show and turns towards me, we both widen our eyes at our proximity. We are just inches apart and if I lean towards her a little more to close the gap, my lips would caress her face like I have often dreamed about.

But obviously, I don't.

I stiffen and freeze. I know I should turn away and return back to my original position far far away from her on one corner of the sofa, I can't bring myself to do it. Neither can I bring myself to close the gap between our bodies and claim those luscious lips I've longed for since forever.

She stiffens too, but doesn't lean away just like me. Her light brown eyes have darkened as I'm sure mine have too.

In that moment, I somehow entertain the thought that maybe, just maybe she is attracted to me just a little.

It's a very dangerous thought to entertain but I still do nonetheless, for in that moment I want to stop thinking about code of friendship and rules and all that shit.

I want to but I can't.

Suddenly, she leans forward and her lips now hover just over mine. Just the slightest of moment and they would brush against each other, and then I would get to taste them, bite them...

I lean away and shake my head, resisting the very strong temptation that is Lee Ji Ah.

Her face falls a little but she shakes her head just like me, to clear her thoughts I suppose. I clear my throat to say something but now the atmosphere between us is quite awkward to say the least and words don't leave my throat.

She avoids looking at me and picks up the remote to resume the show she was watching. A few minutes later she puts on a medical drama which I've never heard of, and ironically enough, a scene when the lead hero who is a dashing doctor entraps the heroine who is a nurse between his arms comes on the TV screen.

He leans in and whispers, "Rules are meant to be broken, aren't they?" before starting a heavy make out session with the said lady in his arms; making Ji Ah hurriedly skip the not-so-PG-13 scene in embarrassment.

Even forty year old doctors are able to get it on with the girl they like-This is the saddest part of the pathetic excuse I call my life.

Fuck my life.