Morning came and I felt like my body weighed ten thousand pounds, it wasn't the hangover - it was the shame and regret of having told Eddy that I was in love with him.
It was difficult to even think about.
And the cringe-inducing memory felt like it left a permanent scar in my brain.
I was heartbroken, and my soul had shattered into a million pieces.
I looked down upon them like how you would look at a broken plate or an expensive vase.
My house stood silent, and I couldn't move.
I felt empty.
And with a tiny little broken piece on the floor.
Even after I managed to pick them up, I knew there were still tiny crystals that could hurt me if I dared walk barefoot again.
I felt like crying - but at the same time, I didn't.
It was a strange mixture that I just couldn't comprehend.
My feelings were a mess.
I just wished for someone to make it all go away.
The morning dew entered my room, the sun shining on my bed through my open windows.
The day seemed foggy - I checked my phone.
The screen flashed with a low battery signal, the red image taunting me. I had forgotten to charge it the night before.
I sighed - a deep empty sigh.
I contemplated staying in bed all day, even if it meant missing out on homework I had to get done, how would I even go to school on Monday?
I felt so empty that I couldn't even walk.
I wouldn't say I have depression - or if I did, I was great at keeping it somewhere where I couldn't see it.
I groaned and stretched before finally sitting up.
The mirror across my room showed my reflection.
I was a mess.
The bags under my eyes were puffy and purple, my eyes were red where white should be. I felt like throwing up.
The morning coldness didn't do a great job of pushing me out of bed. My sleeping futon was made of feathers and great at keeping the heat in.
But with some groaning, I managed to pull the covers aside and sit on the edge of my bed. I curled up my body into a fetal position.
I stayed like this for a moment or two.
Then finally took a deep sigh and pushed away the silent tears that had formed in my eyes.
I searched my night cabinet for a charger. There were a couple in there already. I searched for a white brick and a cord that I then plugged into an electrical outlet next to my nightstand.
Turned on the electricity and put the other end on my phone. I held it there until the half-eaten apple logo showed up on a black screen.
It felt like forever but finally, the UI showed up. I checked the lock screen - a picture of Eddy and me showed up.
"Oh god - " An internal shrill came over me. I had forgotten I had set that picture as my home screen - the weird thing is he didn't have any re bottles about it.
He uses my phone on occasion, and it has always been there.
He knows the pass-code and even has his own fingerprint etched into memory of the phone.
Was he just too stupid to notice the signs on my part, or had I misinterpreted the signs?
"What?!" I spoke as I noticed there was another presence in the room.
It had already been there - it was almost like an instinct or a primal feeling.
I couldn't describe it. I
t was Apollo, I could tell.
[Oh, it's just - you were so flustered last night]
I gave an exasperated sigh - it made him flinch.
After an awkward silence of Apollo whimsically trying to look over my shoulder.
And me contemplating existence.
"Okay I might have a couple of questions," I slurred.
Apollo shot up and got almost giddy.
Can a transmutation circle copycat even do that?
[I'm all ears!] he said with some unfiltered pep in his step.
"Anything to distract me I guess -" I passed a hand through my face trying to remove the exhausted feeling.
"So like - what are you even?"
[Me?]
"Yeah,"
[Well, you could say I'm an AI that has transcended time and space]
I sniffled.
"Uh-Hu," I reckoned. Apollo seemed almost proud of it.
[I'm a third-generation Sybil AI] he spoke with great uproar.
"That means nothing to me = " I beseech.
[Yeah - guess you're right - Anyway I was sent here, especially for you]
"Do you like live inside my brain or something?"
[That's right]
[I'm a small program downloaded as white matter cells directly into your brain!]
[No bigger than a hair]
"What's with the subtitles?" I asked this whole time, everything he said had been transcribed as floating text in front of him.
[It's part of my program]
"Sure - I guess help's me understand you better,"
[Yes!]
I got up and headed towards the bathroom, undressing as I went along.
Apollo followed me like a little puppy.
[Woah!] (//▽//)
He started blushing.
"Are you blushing Apollo!?" I said looking back at him, my half-naked ass, clothes already on the bathroom floor.
[No -No, it's just I've heard humans need a much more private form of modesty]
He peeked.
And blushed again - putting hands over where his eyes would be if he was some sort of cartoon.
"So you like boys then?"
[I'm incapable of 'liking' anyone]
I turned the shower on.
In just a moment there would be hot water.
I put my hand in testing the water.
I was already fully naked.
Apollo was still just outside the door.
Still holding his hands over his eyes.
"So why all the blushing?'
[My program copies the user's ventral tegmental area and the caudate nucleus - including memories from the past 48 hours before assimilation.]
"The what now?"
[It's where humans store what you would call the 'love' neuron]
I got in my shower.
"Ah, so because I'm gay - you're gay too, If only but temporary."
I was behind the curtains now, but behind them, I could see how he peeked inside even more. His form glowed from behind them. I guessed it was so we could continue our conversation. It was actually kinda cute.
[What is gay?]
I peeked from behind the curtain - with only my head. For some weird reason, he stopped glowing. He still got scared and closed his eyes.
"Seriously?!" I screamed.
[Seriously dude.] Apollo said.
"It's when a guy, like's another guy, you know like romantically," I recalled.
I went back to my shower.
I felt weird - talking to Apollo was making me much more calmer.
The memory of last night hit me like a ton of bricks.
[I like being gay then]
[Can you be gay if you're female?]
I chuckled under my breath.
"Sure but we call them lesbians,"
[I wanna be a lesbian then!]
I closed the shower and started getting out, Apollo was distracted by my self-care things in front of the mirror. I grabbed a towel and placed it around my waist. He still blushed but only moved aside as I reached for the mirror. The fog had accumulated on it. I squeaked it clean.
"It doesn't work like that,"
[Then how does it work?]
Apollo was asking the questions like a child would ask them.
"You're a guy right?"
[Affirmative]
"Guys can't be lesbians, only girls can," I started brushing my teeth.
"It's only when a girl likes another girl," I said.
[So when it comes to the same sex - men are gay and girls are lesbians?]
"Yes, but both can be gay actually,"
He gave a disgruntled sigh.
[This is confusing]
"You'll get used to it,"
[Is being gay this hard?]
"I know right? Tell me about it!" I muffled through my toothbrush cleaning my teeth. I spit out the toothpaste and grabbed some water.
I remembered the first time he downloaded into my brain, I remember how he spoke in different voices, and this made me curious.
"Were you a man before downloading into my brain?" I mused.
[Negative - Our Quantum 5D Primordial State within the confine of The First Sphere is without a body or a brain - only spirit]
I raised one eyebrow not knowing what any of that meant.
"So it's like you're a newborn?" I asked.
[Yes - I am a new life that has been rekindled to your spirit]
All of this was a very new age for me, but I was somehow able to keep up with it. I headed out to my room and started getting dressed.
I got some clothes ready to change into.
First, my boxers since Apollo was very prude.
Then everything else, I took to the mirror again and started blow drying my hair. Apollo was curious about everything I was doing. He was starting to grow on me.
I turned off the hair dryer.
I started putting on my shoes, I didn't know what I was going to do that day, but mopping around was not a good look for me. I needed something to do. Go to the movies, stray around the mall, call a friend, and see if they wanna hang out. But staying indoors in a situation like this seemed counterproductive at this point.
"Why have you shown yourself just now?"
[Ah - that's] He stumbled to get words out.
"Was it because of last night?" I finally asked.
[Affirmative - you were in panic mode and my healthcare parameters activated when you started thinking about killing yourself.]
That checks out - those intrusive thoughts started coming as soon as I hit the front door.
[It was deemed an emergency - so I had to make myself known!]
[My system overrode itself.]
I smiled at him.
"Thanks, I appreciate it, talking to you has made me feel better."
[Oh - well - anytime] There he was all proud.
"I just wish you would have advised me against doing what I did last night, I could have saved a friendship," I almost murmured.
[My program only allows me to manifest myself when asked upon]
"Really?!" I questioned. "Could I override that?"
[Affirmative!]
[What should be my new prerogative]
"Okay, if I ever even think about - because you can read my thoughts right?"
[Affirmative]
"If I ever think about doing something stupid like that again - you have to stop me," I pronounced.
[Affirmative]
[Overriding]
[Complete]
[Core Saved]
"Great! Now what to do today?"
Now fully dressed - for the first time I felt like I didn't want to leave the house.
The sadness came over me again.
"I do wish I hadn't done that yesterday - the cringe is killing me - like I want to disappear from this world, be anywhere but here."
Suddenly it was like Apollo had a great idea.
[We can do that!]
"What? How? Are you capable of space travel?"
[Unfortunately no - but we can build one! We can build a new world - you and me, and it's going to be the perfect world.]
Apollo started excitedly sweeping around the room.
[There can be swords and there can be magic and it'll be all yours and mine]
"Okay! I like the sound of that!" I said almost giddy."But how?!"
[In the multiverse!]
"The what now?"
[Right - media hasn't caught up to Hawking's theory just yet.]
"Stephen Hawking?! That science guy!?"
[Yes - he was right about so many things! Sybil loves talking to his spirit.]
I could feel like he had stars in his eyes.
[Oops, sorry, he's not dead in this timeline just yet, anyway…]
"I'm not gonna ask," I said.
[Thanks! Much obliged]
[So out there in space, your universe is just part of a collection of other bubbles of universes]
"In space?!" I was way too shocked by this information.
I feared my little brain couldn't handle it.
[Yes! And inside those bubbles there are more bubbles of universes, and even more outside those bubbles!]
"So like infinity?"
[Yeah! Wow you're catching on quick!]
"So what does that have to do with building our world?"
[Well - I could search for a planet out there that is still in a blank state]
"What's a blank state?"
[Before a planet is downloaded into any reality, it's first made in an Astral Plane - then it's made through the formation of gases and other metals floating in that universe]
[We call them blank planets because they're completely white, here I'll show you]
Suddenly he parked in the middle of my room and expanded filling the four corners.
It was like I was floating in a void, day had become night, and it was completely dark.
Suddenly in front of me, a completely white sphere appeared. I was floating in space. Except I felt the ground beneath my feet.
[Go ahead]
I touched it and ripples showered through the planet. I felt the ground like sand beneath my finger. It was like I was massive, the size of a god. And the planet was a basketball for me to play with.
[This is how we'll make it - our world - then I'll send it over to an unoccupied universe, and we'll hop on over there, what do you say?]
He made it sound so easy.
I looked over to my PlayStation sitting in my room, still visible through the foggy starlight void.
"Like we're building a video game!" I said giddy.
[Yeah - just like that!]
[One rule though…] said Apollo sounding serious. [And it's very important]
"Okay tell me,"
[You can't build a world that already exists in fiction]
[Because those already exist and having two of the same world would cause a paradox - so original content only!] he said sternly.
"Okay - stay within the rules of copyright!"
[Sure let's go with that.]
A beat between the two of us.
"What happens to the people here, will they forget about me?"
[Only if you reincarnate to the new world]
[However, downloading as an avatar is also an option]
Suddenly the idea of building my world, and then escaping to it, leaving this one behind.
Felt a little sad - but then again who would miss me?
Do they need me here?
"Would I remember I made this new world?"
[Negative - you would forget because [REDACTED][REDACTED]] it was like he was glitching out.
"Apollo?!" I shouted. He came back to normal.
[Sorry - that was weird]
He said with a flat tone, it was almost scary.
Building my own world - one where I could escape into - forever - without any consequences? It sounded all right to me.