Heart to heart done I guess

Phillipa opens the door, the noise coming from inside is loud and invasive after our date.

Pippa says hi not overly interested, although she does look at me wearing Matty's coat and at his arm around me.

"You look nice" she says matter of factly.

I notice she is wearing simple jeans and a lilac top. It makes her look younger, her hair is in a bun accentuating her wide face.

"You came together?" She asks noisily as we walk into the room with the others. She wants them to hear? Why? I wonder briefly.

I'm shocked to see Rach looking at me completely floored, I didn't realise I would make that much of an impression. Jen who I assume is the girl in all black looks at me gawking before quickly putting a false smile back on her face.

"Tay you look hot" Rach says, this is what I like about her she is completely unedited in that she just says whatever pops into her head. Matty looks down at me and makes a show of removing my/his jacket to show off my dress.

I suddenly feel so embarrassed and like the whole room is eyeing me and Matty, who puts his arm around my waist. He's such a tease, he knows how to work a room.

Jen laughs loudly, "where's your dress from hun?" Shes says in a patronising tone. Oh so she's one of those, I can practically sense the jealousy coming off her and she's trying to pull me down. Not gonna happen, <i>hun.</i>

Brad next to her has his jaw on the floor. She glances his way. I just wait for her to realise she's pathetic.

"Why you want it?" I ask

Matty smirks.

"No i ugh, I thought I had one similar" she says

"Right" I say just a hint of a patronising tone to my voice.

I decide I need to address him directly. Ross looks absolutely stunned. Not sure that's a good sign.

"Ross we got some drinks on the way in" I indicate to the bag I'm holding. I try to sound normal, and to smile at him reassuringly.

I glance at Rhea who is beaming at me. Malachi waves, he's laughing at the whole scene I've made inadvertently.

"That's great, thanks Tay" Ross recovers his stunned expression and indicates we take them to the kitchen. Matty tactfully let's me follow him alone. He knows I need to just feel normal around Ross. Clear the air.

Ross' kitchen is nice and modern he has an American style fridge with an ice dispenser.

I set the bottles down on the kitchen island. He grabs a glass and pours me a shot of Malibu and lemonade.

He hands it to me.

"You look unbelievable" he says. I need to be strong here. Don't look at him. That's my only ploy, but it's so difficult. He already feels familiar to me.

I finish sipping my drink and look at him. He looks tentative, I don't think he's sure what I'm going to say back. He's got on a khaki shirt and black jeans, and he looks nice, smart even.

"What's the occasion" I ask looking at his smart shirt.

"What's the occasion for you" he retaliates cheekily looking my dress up and down.

And finally resting his eyes on my face.

I laugh somewhat awkwardly. God that stare I must escape it.

"Either way wow, I don't think I've ever seen a girl look better dressed" he says pouring his drink. Jack and coke, I note.

"So thanks for coming and brightening up my evening, considerably. I've been stuck with Rach hitting on Stiffy, Jen and Brad doing whatever it is they do and Pippa well making snarky comments" he laughs

We fall back into our comfortable conversation, it's easy and friendly. I am relieved. I don't want him annoyed with me ever. If I could just keep him, forever and not hurt him. Not fall out with him, I would. I really do not want to hurt him.

The music turns up next door, some kind of dance music. The girls laugh and start jumping around presumably dancing. That grabs my attention.

"I ugh need to tell you," Ross begins his hand resting on mine.

"I just want you to make an informed decision about everything" he looks at me imploringly

He holds my hands in his, then apologises but keeps hold of it when he realises I'm not annoyed.

"Sorry I'm not making moves on you here, I care even just as a friend but obviously as more. But what I'm saying is I want you to be so so careful" he says. He's looking at me completely earnestly.

Rhea bursts into the kitchen Ross looks chagrined. He sweeps his hair back and begins rolling up.

"You need to come dance" Rhea announces

"I'm coming" I begin.

Ross just continues rolling, moment over. Heart to heart done I guess.

Matty comes in smiling at Rhea. It strikes me that he really wants to make an effort with my friend. She smiles back at him. Charmed.

"Doesn't she Matty?" Rhea laughs with him.

"Less talking more dancing and drinking" she instructs me. "This girl can grind I'll have you know" Rhea let's them know loudly.

I'm not that embarrassed I can dance what did they expect?

I laugh with her "how much have you had" I ask her.

"Hey don't pull that shit with me Taylor" she jokes.

Matty is finding this very amusing. I put my hands up in my defence.

"I think shots, for you now so we can stop you being so damn responsible" she says.

Ross hands me a roll up. I light it up, it's minty of course. Then he goes back to leaning against the side, arms folded in front of him. Staring at me. We grab two shots of tequila, Rhea and I both down them. It floors me, tequila is strong.

I sit up on the high stool. Rhea has dragged Malachi into the kitchen and is now asking him to dance with her. Clearly I am taking too long to do as she pleases.

"I think those moves have got to be demonstrated babe, what's grinding when it's at home" Matty says very cheekily, winking. Playful Matty has come out, I would love to grind on him if I'm being honest. He's standing leaning back on the other counter, opposite me.

"Like you don't know" I laugh.

Ross has cheered up and smiles at me openly, that sweet smile. Maybe because I'm teasing Matty.

"Oh you want a lesson? Or a show?" I tease him.

He's staring at me intently, thinking she won't do it. I will.

Not my shy Taylor that's what he's thinking. But if he can be a complicated moody guy one minute and then a simple charming boyfriend the next. Believe me I can do the same, I will keep him guessing until I hear the right song.

"I will take what I can get" he says eyeing me.

I stand up. He watches me, how have I managed to captivate this one. I pull my dress down so it's now a Bardot, exposing my neck and shoulders completely. I was going to wear it like this before but I thought it was too much. It is completely too much. Ross practically boggles at me.

Matty smiles at me, how he doesn't believe I will do this is beyond me. Perhaps I played innocent Taylor very convincingly. I take his hand, and I make him sit on the chair. He can watch me with no distractions. He grabs his cigarette and takes a pull, his body language saying "I'm waiting babe".

I take one more shot, I do need it after all.