I'm Not Good At Confrontations pt.1

Time to Ron and Shine! Ah ha. Haha. Get it? Shut it, I'm funny!

Welp, I had hid in my bed and it was what I needed. Although I must face my demons now... Or demonesses. Succubus would be more accurately descript since.. ya know.

My plans for the day involve getting Rufus; talking to the girls, twins, and Brittney; hopefully surviving whatever the outcome may be; and then enjoying the summer while I can..

Let's do this! Game time! Be the man! Who's the man? I'm the man! Rawr!

"Hello, this is Britina, who is calling?", Brittney had answered. She was a bit extra chipper, so I'm assuming she got the contract deal.

"It's Ron. Master of being subtle and saving damsels in distress."

"Oh haha, Ron. So this is your number huh? When did you get a cell phone?"

Subtly not mentioning about our last encounter? Works for me!

"It was gifted to me... So... Did you get the contract?"

"Did I ever! Oh my god! It is like a dream come true for me!" Well she is definitely excited. That's great.

"So how can I ever repay you..." Brittney had whispered huskily into the phone...

"Ahem.. Nothing. I just needed to make sure you had my number. But I have to go. Long list of things to do today! You know the drill!"

I had hung up as quickly as possible to avoid another potential... stiff.. incident.

Meanwhile Brittney was at home attending to her needs, "Oh I know that drill well, mmm, mama knows it very well."

Now I have to deal with the twins.. Just remember you're a Sir now! Just have to make sure I do it right. Otherwise two extremely strong, intelligent, and hot ladies will murder me.. Or *ape me first, then murder me!

I had expected to be cussed out for taking so long to call them back, "This is Happy Homes Hotel, how may I help you?" from a nasally voice was not what I thought I would hear.

In my confusion, I responded, "Umm, I might have the wrong number. I'm sorry for taking-"

And now I hear two familiar laughs on the other side of the phone.. Great, just great. I actually fell for that.

"I'm sorry Sir. But consider that as punishment for making us wait so long", Lonnie had said over her sister's constant giggling in the background.

Yeah yeah, whatever. I'm not here to be teased! I'm glad you two aren't plotting my murder at least, so that's a consolation prize in my books.

"Have you two been well? I am sorry for taking too long, but I had to wait patiently you know? Didn't want to seem too desperate to call two amazing ladies after our fun night out."

Ah ha! Take that! I cam tease back just as well!

"Oh we have been so lonely without you Sir. We've only had each other to help sate our needs. I don't know how we'll ever make it to your 16th birthday."

Why do you have to say it like that? I mean seriously! You sounded exactly like a blond ditzy wannabe actress. It doesn't help with your sister going 'woe is us, oh woe!!' in the background.

I can only shake my head at their antics. At least they are stable and well. I need some stableness in my life otherwise my sanity is kaput.

Connie responded first, "But we are okay, Sir. The annoying junior agent was told to not disturb us; but he was tailing us while we were... focused on other things. I guess hind sight is that at least he has been following our lessons. Even if we should have noticed him."

Lonnie decided now was a good time to interject, "The boss was a little angry until we mentioned whom we were with then she sobered up quickly. It was pretty much the usual work after that. Though she wants us to evaluate our junior agent if he's ready for a promotion."

"Oh yeah? Well how's that going?"

"Well he's tied up and gagged at the moment. If he can somehow get out of that and escape us, then the real evaluation can begin." Lonnie had said.

...

...

"Oh. Well I hope goes well. Do take it a little easy on him. Love you girls. Talk later okay? Bye!"

Back to the insatiable ladies, "Did he just say he loves us? He loves us? He Loves Us! He LovES Us!" .... shiite.

Did I end that too soon? Yes. I wanted to ask a few things, but that got a little too deep too fast for me.

Did I throw out the L word too soon? Maybe. With those two, it can at least placate them.. And maybe ensure my survival.

With how weird everything has been, not to mention with what I saw earlier before my nap, I am going to need it. I'm just not ready for this.. I wanted to live to a ripe old age. At this rate I'm going to die under, at least, five different women...

Well that's not a bad thought.

I'll get back to that thought when I'm in my happy place.

Now for the hard part, but I need to get Rufus first. And with that I headed back to the Possible household. I made sure I listened first before getting close. No need to witness anything else that I don't want to know about.

No noises. It's quiet... Which means the little twins may not be here. Shit. I forgot that if Mrs. P was tending to herself then that means she was alone.. And still is.

I can hope that maybe Rufus was left here. Hope. Just hope for the best, Ron. With that thought I rang the bell and waited, again!, for someone to answer. Of course I knew just who it would be.

But seeing a hot, wet, face flushed red, covered in only a towel that is pulled so far up that even the slightest bend at the waist and I would see if the carpet matches the drapes, her intelligence is only exceeded by her beauty, Mrs Dr. P.... So yeah, my jaw was on the ground.

"Ronald! It's so good to see you're back! Oh, do pardon me for greeting you like this. But I had a hot workout and needed to shower off."

I bet you did...

"Come in! Let me get you a drink before you grab Rufus from the twins's room." She grabbed me by the arm, and quite literally, pulled me into the den of a lioness..

It's okay. I can do this. I mean it is not hard at all despite that I am harder than a steel pole right now. She smelled like coconuts and felt soft like a marshmellow...

"I'll be right back Mrs. Dr. P!"

And so I ran. Yep. I found Rufus was messing around with some tools in the little twin's room... I swear, some days, I think he's actually a tech guru reborn into this new body.

Other days he's a cheese fanatic. And thankfully I understand that kind of love.

"Rufus! Buddy! I'm so sorry mom tossed you here instead of taking you with us! You been okay?"

Now I know that he's a naked mole rat. And that everyone may think I'm nuts for I ever mentored this... But the reason I suspect he is also a reincarnated soul... Well I can understand him. I mean really understand him.

"Friend!!.... I have grave news for you."

Oh god.

"Okay, lay it on me. What happen while you were stuck here. I csn handle it."

And with a sincerity that blazed as strongly as a firey thousand Suns, he said, "You are fucked, friend."

Sigh... Don't I know it buddy. Don't I know it.. He continued to tell me about the gadgets he and the little twins had made. It seems they created a portable cheese melter with his help. Well, he calls it a cheese melter, they called it a super high intensity thawer... They named their invention as 'The S.H.I.T'. I don't know if I should be impressed or laughing at that.

When I came downstairs I went to the kitchen to tell Mrs. P I don't need a drink and I'm heading out now. In hindsight, I should have known better. I already saw her enjoy herself.

But to see her bent over the kitchen counter reading the newspaper... As if I would notice the paper! All I can see is what she wants me to see!

"Oh Ronald! There you are! I was wondering when you were gonna cum down to me. Would you like that drink now."

To be honest, after drinking in the sight of you I'm quite full.

"Oh my Ronald! You're quite the charmer with those words. I can see why those girls love being around you."

I said that out loud?!? Oh for.. Come on! get it togethgggrrrr....

And another cliche to end all cliches. Her towel 'mysteriously' unravelled and it fell down..

"I'm sorry, I have to go! Sorry again! Have a great day Ann, I mean Mrs. P!"

I ran again. At least I'm getting great cardio in at this rate.

And another meanwhile, Ann was lamenting at her kitchen at how her prey disappeared. "Oh well. At least I know he enjoyed the view. He he. Just take it one inch at a time... Mmmm."

I'm already mentally beat from just these few things? This is ridiculous. I still have the hardest part left to do.

"It's okay friend. I am here to back you up! You shall be the alpha and conquer all these mates that desire you!", Rufus was play acting as a Roman conqueror when he said that.

At least I got my best buddy back. I think I can do this. I hope I can... Even if Rufus is also being odd.. Crap, I hope they didn't brainwash him too.

I groaned at the thought of this future talk I'm going to need to have with the girls.