Theory of Being a Side Character

Hu Chuntian cannot be seen anywhere in Nushen High today, but people still talked about him.

(I guess that's the disadvantage of being a main character for you.) Mo Aini looked lazily at the cherry blossom tree that had started to bloom in the schoolyard, holding a pen and a notebook.

"Isn't that Hu Chuntian's black cat?"

"What's his name again?"

"No, it's the other guy, he just looks like it."

"Man, I got excited about nothing. I could have dunk the stupid cat's head in the toilet."

Hearing this, Mo Aini had added another slash on a tally at his notebook.

Last time, he had a theory that anime logic states that side characters can do no wrong as long as it has nothing to do with the plot or the important characters. Even if he did get involved, the focus would be the main character and he would only be a cannon fodder to them.

Meaning: He can break any laws he wanted.

Meaning: He can buy some booze!

If he can prove his theory is correct, as long as he's not with any of the important characters like Shu Chuanli, Gou Manchu, She Haoran, and Ma Jianyu, he could definitely deliberately break any rule he wants and get away with it. He could even get away with murder!

Not that he wants to murder anyone besides Hu Chuntian anyway. Which he can't, since he's an important character.

Here is the tally of evidence that he is unnoticeable and has full law immunity as a side character:

When he stole an energy drink from a soccer team player, nobody noticed and he didn't get any consequences for it.

When he pretended as Jie Taime, the people didn't care enough to check if such a student existed.

When he skipped class after getting caught in the rain during his confession to Hu Chuntian, he did not get any notice from the teachers nor was he reprimanded the next day.

Whenever he threw 'otome cheat' papers at Mo Jiagei's direction so she could make the right choice, nobody noticed except Shu Chuanli.

And now, when he got caught in a scandal with Hu Chuntian, many people could not tell if it really was him and he did not get called to the principal's office. But Hu Chuntian did get a seven-day suspension.

Thanks to that suspension, he now has temporary freedom from that annoying Tiger Emperor. Who's laughing now?

The final piece of evidence left to make his theory and undisputed fact would be if he could get away with buying booze as a minor.

And so, he set out to do his experiment by going out to a convenience store outside of school and buying cans and cans of beer.

"Oh, I haven't tried this flavor before." He threw another one in the dozens that he had collected in his grocery cart. "Ah, this one has 10% alcohol content. Nice!"

What Mo Aini did not know is that there was a figure taking pictures of him, hiding from a rack of mouthwash and skincare.

Mo Aini did not spot this phone camera, but he did spot the CCTV on the upper right corner of the wall, pointed in his direction.

"I wonder if I could do this...." Mo Aini flipped the camera off.

He waited for a while, but there was no intercom speaker calling him out.

"Hmm.... How about this then?" He kicked a small rack of canned goods and fruit cocktails.

There was a large clang, the grocery items scattering all over the place. Mo Aini peered his head over to see the reaction of the cashier girl, but she was still staring off to space, a bright smile on her lips.

"Ok.... That's not creepy at all." Mo Aini felt a bit of goosebump from the quiet and stiff cashier who just stands there like a mannequin to greet customers.

He pushed his cart cautiously to the motionless lady, and once he got five meters away from the counter—

"Hi, welcome to Jintian Hao Store! Nice day, isn't it?"

"Ahhh!" Mo Aini almost got a cardiac arrest when the mannequin-like cashier girl suddenly moved and spoke in a loud, jolly voice. "Y-Yes.... I guess it is."

"Please move your items to the counter and I will be giving the total of your purchase in a minute!"

Mo Aini awkwardly put all the cans of beer, still creeped out by this side side character. She must be so irrelevant to the plot that she almost has no characterization besides being a cashier girl.

"The total is 144 yuan*!"

The cashier girl seemed to only speak in exclamation points.

Mo Aini grabbed his wallet with shaky fingers and handed her the money.

"I received 200 yuan in total! Here's the change!"

He was about to receive the 56 yuan from the cashier girl when someone grabbed his hand.

"This guy is still a minor, miss." A husky voice that could only be a result of chain-smoking said. "Don't you see the school uniform?"

Mo Aini felt like coughing up a gallon of blood. (Fucking Hu Chuntian, what are you doing here!?)

The cashier girl blinked 5 times, like a robot still processing. Then, her smile vanished as she looked at Mo Aini up and down.

"I'm sorry, sir. You cannot purchase alcohol if you are not above 18 years old. Can you show me your student ID card?"

Mo Aini internally cursed up a storm and showed the ID hanging over his neck.

"You are still 17 years old. Therefore, we cannot let you purchase these items. I hope you understand. Here's your payment."

The cashier girl handed back his money to him and hid the plastic bags containing all the beers on her side of the counter.

She smiled apologetically. "You can purchase fruit juice or energy drinks instead. It's a healthier alternative too for students like you."

"No, thank you." Mo Aini sulked and glared at the smirking Hu Chuntian.

(Fuck this underaged anime body to hell! I missed being 24 again when I could buy all the beers and booze I like without anyone giving a shit!)

"Next customer, please."

"Right. You don't have another pack of this brand anymore?" Hu Chuntian showed her a pack of cigarettes with a running tiger logo.

"It's out of stock now, sir. We will be restocking next week." The cashier girl said.

"Fine. Just this one then." Hu Chuntian lazily threw the cigarette pack over to the counter.

"That will be 16.9 yuan."

"Hey, this guy's my classmate!" Mo Aini complained. "How come he can buy cigarettes while I can't buy some beers!?"

"Are you above 18, sir?" The cashier girl asked.

Hu Chuntian took something from his wallet. It was his student ID that he doesn't wear around his neck. "See for yourselves. I was held back a year."

"19 years old." The cashier girl confirmed. "Therefore, the purchase is valid."

"Pfft, you're a repeater after all. As expected." Mo Aini mocked pettily because he lost to Hu Chuntian.

"And turns out, I'm older than you, so you should be talking more respectfully to me." Hu Chuntian's eyes gleamed. "You should call me gege."

Mo Aini scoffed. "No way in hell, brat."

He left the convenience store. The theory was right, but it was futile because the nuisance Hu Chuntian intervened. He kicked a trashcan to vent.

After a while, Hu Chuntian followed him. "Hey."

Mo Aini ignored him, turning at an intersection.

"Hey."

Mo Aini growled. "What do you want?"

"You're actually older than me, aren't you? That's why you won't call me gege." Hu Chuntian said.

"Maybe I just don't want to, why would it matter?" Mo Aini retorted.

"You're not an ordinary student. I saw what happened earlier with the cashier girl. I had been watching you since the start." Hu Chuntian showed the phone to him with a video. "What are you really? Do you have powers or something?"

(The powers of being a side character, which is pretty useless if it easily becomes void because of this freaking Tiger Emperor.)

"If I had powers, I could have made you disappear." Mo Aini scoffed.

"Then how old are you really? Are you like those immortal demons that suck the life force of humans? What was that again.... A succubus?" Hu Chuntian guessed.

"Succubus is for a female-presenting demon, incubus is for a male-presenting one." Mo Aini corrected. "But I'm surprised you even know what a succubus is."

"I watched a foreign movie about them from my father's DVD collection." Hu Chuntian scanned Mo Aini's appearance from head to toe. "You don't look anywhere near seductive though."

"I'm not an incubus." Mo Aini said, then sneered. "I'm just an immortal god that descended from the heavens to judge good children and bad children. So you better be good to me."

"Are you Santa Claus then?" Hu Chuntian laughed incredulously.

"Very funny." Mo Aini was tired of this banter.

"Are you really an old grandpa wearing the face of a high school student?"

"Alright, fine. I'll tell you how old I really am." Mo Aini just wanted this guy to go away. "I'm old enough to be your Da Ge*. Happy?"

"So we're just almost the same age?" Hu Chuntian said.

"I'm saying we're not that too far off. I'm an actual adult, and you're barely one." Mo Aini said. "Anyway, I'm going back to school. You're suspended, so listen to your elder and leave me alone."

Hu Chuntian blocked him with a bright smile. "But Da Ge! It's no fair than I'm the only one who took responsibility for our 'fun' time."

Mo Aini rolled his eyes. "A fun time that you made up. Aren't you bothered by the scandals at all?"

Hu Chuntian grinned. "If I want it to end, it would end by now. But I want it to keep going and become the biggest scandal in the history of Nushen. I can make everyone gossip about you more than a famous celebrity."

He patted Mo Aini on the cheek. "So you better be good to me, mysterious immortal Da Ge."

Mo Aini shook his hand away, and entered the school gates.

The next day, the squad at Mo Aini's table was busily eating lunch, when they overheard girls whispering from the next table.

"Hu Chuntian changed status and posted something on his Weibo! It says...."

"In a loving relationship with Mo Aini."

The Mo Aini in question nearly choked on his fried chicken.

A female student pointed at him. "Hey, that's Mo Aini, right? I remember now, he's from the same class as me!"

"Is he the other person from the scandal picture!? The 'black cat'!?"

"He must be Hu Chuntian's lover!"

Mo Aini's peaceful days as an unnoticeable side character was now officially over.

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