The Street Performer

[ —Oui! What's all that shit for, ey? You ain't gonna perform an autopsy on me here are ye?—

"Shut up, beardy. I don't have time for that, I still have shit to do since I was rudely interrupted. Now give me a second, I gotta think." Michael said with a smile, bending over to grab the sword.

Once he held the sword by the hilt, he pressed his left hand to a patch on left side of his neck.

"You actually called! I was like, 'call me later~kay!' and then you got all serious like: 'I gotta go die and things' as if you weren't going to call me.

Fast forward through all the gruesome moments in the horror flick, and you're here!" Elise cried with ecstasy. As always, she used a burly man's voice while impersonating Grey.

Grey sighed inwardly. 'I really shouldn't have told her to cut the opening sequences…'

"Hey Elise, long time no talk. As proof that God hasn't improved much since the Old Testament, I'm still alive somehow." He laughed.

"You make it sound like God's the only one keeping you alive. I see how it is! Humph." She said, crossing her arms.

"Do you want praise?" He asked with a gentle smile.

"I'd love some!" She cried cheerily.

"You're the best Elise. I couldn't blind, murder, and torture people without you." He joked.

"Awwww! You're welcome. Who needs God's wrath when I'm here, anyway?

Here, let me give you a scripture. 'Go forth and bring the Rapture, and loot all the scum you capture.' You see? I got your back, boo."

Grey smiled wryly after hearing this. While he enjoyed the irony of coming to an evil "paradise" as an Archangel, he also didn't see it as a joke.

While he was agnostic, the idea of a God coming to earth to pass judgment on all the people in Dark Paradise appealed to him.

That's why he read the Bible even though it was a minor religion in the 22nd century. It spoke to him and his purpose in life, even if he didn't believe in it.

He truly wished that an entity would cleanse this world of all the evil people in this world one day, even though he believed he'd be dragged down to hell along with them.

So, in a brilliant stroke of irony, the ironic nature of his name was not ironic at all.

That didn't mean that he used this name haphazardly, however.

If his username put him in harm's way, he could always reference the Old Testament and claim that he drew inspiration from the violence depicted.

That way, he could represent the ideal he strove for while tricking people into the ideal that would speak to them. It was a calculated gesture and the main reason he used Christianity as his pillar of justice.

Elise knew this, but she was always cheeky to an extreme. In a sense, their joking was just another means of getting into character.

"I'm not sure that the world needs such scripture but…"

"You want lots and lots of help looting people?" She asked with glee while adding a clapping sound effect.

Grey sighed. "Yes. Pretty please, Elise, will you help me loot people for days?"

"For days and days? It's a date! Who first? Let's rob em' dry." She asked excitedly.

Grey smiled. "Okay, this is what I need."

After his talk with Elise, Michael set to work. He took the sword and ran the gloves over every part of it. He glided his fingers over the hilt, the blade, and even the nooks and crannies.

Dikines was starting to doze off due to the blood loss, but he was still watching with interest.

After he finished, Michael tapped a couple of times on his terminal. Then, to the crowd's surprise, something odd happened—it started floating.

Michael raised it above his head and spun the sword on his finger as if it was a 21st-century basketball.

He gave this demonstration to awe the crowd and discourage them from fighting him. People were naturally afraid of the unknown, so this was a good intimidation tactic.

Instead of taking the sword out of the air, he left it floating and went to work on the next item.

Michael talked to Elise multiple times for multiple programs, and he was working at breakneck speed.

He unrolled the 2-inch thick ribbon and once again started running his left thumb across its length.

As he did this, he started pulling with his right hand to make sure that the glove reached the point he wanted to cut it off.

Finally, he put the ribbon into his mouth and tore off the length he wanted to work with.

"Dikines, this is going to hurt. Grin and bear it." Michael said in a ruthless yet joking manner.

Dikines had put his head on the ground, so he barely opened his eyes when Michael said this.

That was in Michael's favor because he didn't want to hear Dinkines grumbling and arguing about what he was about to do.

Michael wrapped the ribbon around his broken leg three times. Once over the wound, once on his thigh, and finally once below the gash.

The moment it was complete, he took off his right glove and reached back into his pocket.

No less than a few seconds later, Dikines started screaming.

"Oui! I'm trying to die in peace over here. What in the fuck you doin' trying to ruin it for me!" He gruffed aggressively.

"I must not be talking loudly enough. I said, grin and bear it, you big pussy. This is T-Life gauze. It's lined with an antiseptic.

The reason that you're in pain is because it's acting as a tourniquet while also readjusting your shattered fibula." Grey explained dryly.

"I must not be talkin' loudly enough, I said I'm trying to die here in peace. You tryin' to take pity on your enemy or somethin' you fuckin' twat?" He roared.

"Stop being a whiny little bitch. I'm not arbitrarily trying to save people that tried selling me into slavery.

I'm saving you because you were honorable.

I'm guessing that honor is a rare trait that I'm not going to experience for the rest of my stay in this hell hole.

Or do you got a problem with that?" He said angrily under his breath. He was hoping that other people didn't hear him.

Michael was being aggressive and cussing up a storm because it was the language that Dikines spoke. If he didn't, he wouldn't get anywhere with him.

While Michael wanted to cleanse this world of people trying to break it down, he also believed in redemption. If he didn't, he could never live with himself.

Dikines may have saved his life, and he was returning that favor.

However, Dikines could not understand that, so he was shocked to hear these words coming out of Michael's mouth.

Michael prepped more gauze and cut it off. He then took Dikines left arm in his hand. Dikines started to resist, but Michael started talking again.

"I won, terms are decided by the winner, are they not?" Michael argued.

Dikines did not argue with this. He was a warrior so, while he didn't like it, he had to agree.

Michael then started wrapping his arm, but he wrapped the limb five times this time around.

"Okay, I'm going to make a scene so people don't think I'm arbitrarily helping you. Take the pain and keep your mouth shut."

After saying this, Michael reached back into his pocket. A couple of seconds later, the entire audience could hear Dikines' arm snapping.

He stood up proudly in a proud position, looking down upon the worm below him.

"Dikines, my friend!" He proclaimed. "Don't forget you owe me. But also, don't forget the pain you're feeling for attacking me, you dirty beast.

You hear that sound? That's the sound of being a cripple for life. You're going to survive, but your arm will never work again. It's far worse than broken now.

But rejoice! I will be returning for payment at a later date, so you have something to look forward to!" He sneered.

The crowd started clapping when they heard this. 'I hate you all.' Michael thought to himself bitterly.

After this, he returned to his former position, resting on his haunches.

"Okay, listen to me. I'm about to give you a bottle of water. Drink it." He explained.

Dikines shot him a nasty look.

"Have you forgotten? A normal bottle of water blinded that pretentious fool.

Someone that [smart] should know that they shouldn't catch a water bottle with a flaming hand." He laughed.

Dikines was in an immense amount of pain, but he started laughing too. "Hah. You got a good point there."

Michael put his hands in his pockets one more time. Immediately after, he put the glove back on, took the bottle of water in his hands, and unscrewed the lid.

Michael poured water on his glove. He was analyzing the water and blood while also cleaning the glove simultaneously. The action was truly effective.

Once he was done, he rolled a drop of the diluted blood into the bottle, shook it, and addressed Dikines once more.

"Drink this, ya fuckin' cripple." Saying this, he put the bottle of water into Dikines' hand.

Dikines looked very confused. "What's in this? Are you actually a dark mage or some shit? Turnin' invisible, throwing around your looks, and now you're playing with blood?" He said as he winced.

"Fortunately for that cripple over there, I'm not. Otherwise he'd be cookin' in a cauldron or some shit." He joked.

Dikines sported a wide grin. "You're a cheeky bastard till the end, ain't ya?"

"That's what women say before they reject me. Now chug that; it'll be much easier to choke it down." He chuckled.

The two of them shared a laugh before Dikines chugged the water.

After about five seconds, Dikines felt a huge pulse in his body. It felt as though his entire consciousness left his body by a couple of feet, and his soul was being dragged away.

Once his soul returned, he felt an immense amount of heat and circulation in his body.

"What is this fuckin' shit, you trying to save me or kill me? Cuz the last time I checked you're supposed to keep the person that owes you a favor alive, you twat." He grinned, wondering what the hell was happening to him.

"That's restoring the blood in your body. Your bones have been corrected till the general point of proper healing."

"You hear that, everyone! This stupid Dragons Brigade wannabe will live unless someone has the balls to piss off me and his faction at the same time.

You keep people alive if you want them to owe you a favor.

If you're new to Dark Paradise, here's a tip. Everyone here is loaded. You're loaded, but they are probably more loaded than you.

But if you drain them dry, you're more than twice as rich. That rate of return would look great on quarterly business reviews, but even better in your bank account!" He yelled.

The crowd started laughing. As expected, these sick creatures were mostly in business.

Know your audience to play your audience.

"If you don't get your rocks off killing greasy old men, remember to shake them down for all their god damn money!" He announced.

The audience started chatting merrily after his lecture. Afterward, he went back to addressing Dikines under his voice.

"Do not try to touch that gauze, by the way. If you do, it will shock you. So I set it up that way, so you didn't try to touch it.

You're a dumb fuckin' bastard, so I had to treat you like a lab rat." Michael said with an evil grin.

"You fucker, just when I thought that I thought you were a warrior or some shit." Dikines said bitterly.

"One last thing, Dikines. Listen up and listen good. You listening?"