Chapter eighty-five: Not allowed to love him

Alone, he sat as he watched the night dews drop, the night fireflies announce their presence as the night frost enveloped his being. The lovely face of the girl with gentle dominion occupied his thoughts. Yoona took a large part of his heart that can never be replaced though he has a new bride. Fate seems to be cruel to him.

Years of his early adulthood has been spent in the search of her, fortunes has gone down the drain but there is still no sign of her. He had loved her and still love her better than any other woman living, but unfortunately his love had never prospered .

Succumbing to his mother's antics and allowing himself to be married to the gentle high bred lady by the name Eun-hye, was because her chief merit in his eyes was that her face, in it's gentle proud beauty somewhat resembled Yoona's. Yes! he chose her but he will never give to her such love as he had given Yoona.

"Yoona, do you know how much I dream of you?__ You are always in my dream saying to me to let you go__ Can't you please forgive me and allow yourself to be found? ... Allow me to atone for my sins... My Yoona, my poor beautiful Yoona!". A man's lamentations could be heard down the halls as the sounds traveled with the speed of light, the sobs and the contents no doubt chilled the listeners as cold steeped into their spines. What could make a man cry this much? Only those who had lost their love could understand.

He sat up from the railings from where few minutes ago sat his crowned princess. Looking intently at the dark water , a thought which he laid at the back of his mind evolved . He still can't understand if it was an illusion or his imagination. He could not help seeing how Eun-hye's slender body trembled and shook as a leaf in a wind when he unveiled her. The eyes that looked at him then, were filled with something he hadn't detected from her eyes before, something he's too scared to admit as the gleam faded when he announced to the world she is his princess. He had drew back in sudden, startled alarm , for it flashed to him that she might have fallen for him.

The thought that, in all unconscious acts and ignorance he had won her heart was terrible to him. He would at that moment have chosen another if only to avoid growing something that might destroy her. Still, he was too true a gentleman, too noble a man, to allow his discovery be perceived.

The dreamy expression and her startled alarm when he saw her seemed to agree with his thoughts. The gentle childlike and beautiful girl loved him, and he in turn loved someone else.

"Eun-hye, I beg of you, let this be purely my imagination and not reality for I'm afraid I will have to hurt you". There was an infinite pity or compassion in his voice. Something like a mist of tears gathered in his eyes as he recalled his one-time betrayal. His considerate kindness for Eun-hye will be greater from this moment forward, now that he knew what her love must cost her.

After a standing silence of some minutes, he remembered his excitement when he received an information from his eunuch that one of the contestants by the name Choi Seo-yun had taken ill. Another information reached him at the same time that a palanquin with the emblem of a crane had also entered the palace, only one family in the whole of Shu had that emblem, the Jang's family.

The spies he planted around his mother had delivered the information together with the empress's plans, for it was his spy that received the secret order directly from her. At times like that, his love for his mother's power skyrockets, for she's the only one who could get whatever she wants as longs as it benefits her.

"Royal mother, I wonder how you will react to tomorrow's news because a great wave of shock will pass through the whole nation tomorrow". The chief eunuch serving him closely, rushed in with an animal fur jacket with thick beddings and draped it on his master complaining. "Your highness, you are almost turning into an ice statue, could you please be merciful to this servant and be mindful of your health?".

A soft chuckle eroded the crown prince's mouth as he saw the worried expression on his face. Draping the jacket completely over his entire body, he turned to him with a teasing smile dancing on his lips, "You mean like this?". He gesticulated draping the jacket tightly over him while using the attached hoodie to cover his head. The playful side shown to him by his master brought tears of joy to him. "Yes your highness, like that". He bowed respectfully before his master and left him alone.

CONSORT KI'S PALACE

The consort who always had a mild temperament seemed agitated this night for it has been 9 days since the emperor's night visits. She's not even allowed to go to him as he claimed he had mountains of work to discharge.

'What could make the emperor treat me this coldly? If I hadn't known him so well, I would like to believe he has found me old and is in the arms of a younger woman". Consort Ki shrugged off the thought as another thought invaded her mind. 'He once swore to me that only sickness or death could tear us apart'.

Sickness or death?. During a Christian marriage, there is a part of the vow that always scare me 'To be with each other in sickness and in health.... till death do them part'. For emperor Kang, he swore to a woman he loved to be with her always, no matter the conditions of the world and even if the whole world tears them apart , but he hadn't been confident he would be with her if he falls sick(Contagious) or dies__As he wouldn't have her worried over him.

A woman who is already dressed for bed with her night robes , shrugged out of it and screamed for her servants. Her chief maid who always waited on her lady waltzed in with apprehension visible on her face.

"What's wrong, your highness?"

"Get me my royal robes__ tonight, I serve the emperor", her body trembled as she tried to discard any ominous feelings.

"But, your highness... the emperor said not to visit anymore..."

"Are you deaf?", she shouted at her, every trace of dignity missing from her voice. "I have to be with him tonight, don't let me repeat myself!".

The palace lady waltzed out and returned with the palace ladies from the tailor's chamber, assortment of new cloths of different varieties adorned the tray, in line with them the make up artists stood outside waiting for their turn.

After all the necessary requirements of hers had been fulfilled, she waltzed out of her room striding towards the emperor's palace with her entourage, a determined expression claiming her face.