I Don't Need Your Kindness

I was confused.

Morgan asked me what I was having for breakfast.

Strange.

"Um. Bread and soup?"

Her gaze immediately went to the trembling servant at the door and pointed down at the floor, "You. Come over here."

He squeaked like a rat and kneeled in front of her.

Wow. So he does know how to give respect.

"What is the meaning of this?", Morgan pointed at my unsavory breakfast and demanded.

"Y-your H-highness.", the servant stammered, "T-the Dawn P-Palace is experiencing a shortage of i-ingredients. That's why the prince's food is like this."

The audacity of this idiot! He's lying to the bloody First Princess!

"Oh? Is that so?"

And she believed it?!

Genius, my ass! She can't even detect a lying fool!

I saw the servant calming himself down and looking relieved.

"Then what happened to the supply vehicle I saw last night carrying fresh supplies to the Dawn Palace?"

Oh. I take back what I said about her.

The servant was trembling again under Morgan's fierce gaze, "You dare speak lies to me?"

"N-no Your Highness! I-it was a m-mistake! Pleases forgive me!", he was groveling at her feet.

"Forgive you?", Morgan narrowed her eyes, "Then explain to me why a High Prince is eating that sorry excuse for food. "

"Hiek!", he couldn't respond.

Morgan looked at me and I unconsciously flinched, "Mordred. Answer me. Is it the first time this is happening?"

Her voice carried so much authority that I wondered whether to answer the question standing up or with my head pressed against the floor before her.

I looked at the servant, he was pleading with me with his eyes. How laughable. He is asking for help from me.

I shook my head and spoke calmly, "No. Your Highness. I've been treated like this ever since I could remember."

Is it just me or did I see her eyes widen in shock?

She turned to the servant, "Don't tell me. You and the other servants indulged in most of the supplies and have been giving a High Prince scraps to eat?"

Whoa. She is sharp.

Also, this is quite entertaining. Breakfast and a show!

"No no! Y-your Highness. That's not it!"

"You dare to lie again? Or is it the High Prince, who is lying?", a dangerous glint appeared in her eyes.

The room started to shake as her aura leaked out and a terrifying chill made me shiver. The servant was trembling violently as the terrifying aura emanating from Morgan pressed down on his body.

"IT'S T-THE H-HIGH P-PRINCE!", the fool shouted and quickly placed his hand on his mouth.

Oh boy. He just dug his own grave and jumped into it.

Morgan's terrifying aura and bloodlust disappeared and a deadly silence surrounded the room.

"Lies.", Morgan spoke in a voice that was barely a whisper. "I was wondering why the Dawn Palace looked so unkempt despite the constant financial support."

Wait. Do I get financial support? That's news.

"Raegis.", she called. Her shadow rippled and a person clad in black and a mask that covered half of his face emerged.

"Take this man along with all the other servants and question them. Also, investigate everything that has been happening in here until now.", Morgan ordered.

The knight nodded, "Yes, your Highness.", and dragged the sniveling servant away who screamed, "PLEASE FORGIVE ME, YOUR HIGHNESS!"

Well. I guess that's the last time I'll see that guy. I then looked at the receding figure of the person that appeared from the shadow.

Phantom Knights, an elite and secret order of highly trained knights hand-picked by the High King himself. They answer only to Arthur and one of their main duties is to protect members of the royal family.

Well, except for me. Apart from some obvious reasons, there was also the fact that I had never set foot outside the heavily guarded palace compound in all my years.

So there was little security I needed.

Yeah. Mordred was confined in these walls since birth. Unlike his siblings who went to school, made friends, and enjoyed their childhood, he was homeschooled and always kept behind the walls of the Dawn Palace.

Well, I guess keeping him away from the outside world where it is difficult to monitor him is a smart move.

Anyway, I don't understand what Morgan is doing here. She never paid any attention to me. So why now of all times?

As the screams faded away. I sat down and continued my breakfast. I am still hungry and even the salty abomination which is nowhere near a soup tasted fine.

Morgan turned around and was shocked by the sight of me eating my 'breakfast'.

"How can you eat that garbage?", she asked in surprise.

I shrugged, "I've been eating this 'garbage' ever since I learned how to chew."

There was silence as she absorbed what I'd said.

"So. What are you doing here, your Highness?", I asked.

She gazed at me with her scarlet eyes, "I heard about your punishment, Mordred."

Ah. So that's it.

I will be going to a place known for its high death rate, so she wants to see me properly for the first and the last time. I am her brother after all.

Did she think that helping me by fixing my living conditions and punishing those rude servants would make things easier between us?

How sickening.

I finished my bread and soup with a grimace. It was nasty but filling. After washing down the saltiness from my mouth with warm orange juice, I wiped my mouth and smiled.

"I understand, Your Highness."

She frowned in confusion, "What?"

"After all, isn't it a royal courtesy to visit and aid your dying kin during their final days?"

I saw that my words shook her, making a crack in her cold indifferent expression. I leaned back.

"What you just did for me. Was that kindness? Then I am sorry Your Highness. I don't need it.", I curled my lip into an icy smile.

She quickly recovered and shook her head, "What I did was necessary. A High Prince must never eat that sorry excuse for food."

"Oh, now I'm a High Prince to you? I thought I never existed in your world.", I replied in mock surprise.

"Mordred-"

"You visit me for the first time after ignoring me all my life and you think you can talk to me like an older sister? ", I didn't let her talk.

Unfortunately, Morgan was not one to back down easily.

"Mordred.", Her voice made me stop. I looked at her and was surprised. The cold Morgan Pendragon is looking at me with concerned eyes.

"You are been punished due to your actions. But even I feel like your punishment is too harsh for a thirteen-year-old. You should talk to Father. Or if you want, I can talk to him.", she offered.

I just stared at her. Interesting. So seeing a thirteen-year-old going to a dangerous battlefield pricks her conscience while not even acknowledging the existence of her little brother does not?

What a strange person.

And she wants to help me now? After all the times the previous Mordred called for help?

The audacity.

"Yes. I am getting punished for my actions. But have you ever wondered the reasons for my actions?", I asked.

Before she opened her mouth and answered my question.

"I only wanted His Majesty to confirm my existence. I wanted to be part of the family. I only wanted to be acknowledged.", I gave her a bitter smile, "I believe the word 'acknowledge' is not foreign to you. Oh, the rising star of Camelot."

She gave no reaction but I could sense that my words stung her. I could see it in her eyes.

"You have an ideal right? Acknowledge the strong, push the weak to become strong, and ignore the weakest and most hopeless.", I placed my chin on my hand.

"You ignored me because I was the weakest. But do you have any idea how much I struggled to at least be weak? I thought that if I progressed from weakest to weak, you might at least notice me."

"But it's quite difficult to notice how strong a weakling has become if you ignore them. A strong person will be seen as a weakling until their strength is acknowledged. But what if no one acknowledges their strength?"

"He will remain a weakling.", Morgan answered.

"Exactly.", my lips curled into a cold smile. I got up and walked up to her. She is taller than me so I had to look up to meet her cold scarlet eyes which began to shake.

"You and His Majesty never acknowledged me. I studied diligently, trained hard, suffered many humiliations, faced starvation, and sustained painful injuries. I even caused some trouble to at least get a scolding."

"The only ones who ever acknowledged me were Gawain and the First Queen."

"Even Elaine, who bullied me relentlessly knows who I am. Of course, I hate her. But I loathe you and His Majesty.", I said the last part quietly but enough for her to hear me properly.

This is not just my feelings being expressed. I am also bringing out the anger, sadness, and suffering that Mordred experienced while growing up.

Morgan was shocked by the words coming out of my mouth, from the mouth of the brother that never existed. Finally, I broke that cold mask on your face, sister.

I turned around and let out a huge breath, "Phew. Glad that is out of my system."

There was a long silence as my words sunk into Morgan.

"What can I do? To make things right."

The question from Morgan hit me like a spark of electricity.

Seriously, after all this time, now you want to make amends? Unbelievable. How shameless can you be?

The audacity!

I looked back at her, looking at her with the same cold gaze she always wore on her face.

"I am afraid it is too late, Your Highness. Now please leave. I have to get ready."

We stared at each other for a moment, none backing down. Finally, she closed her eyes and nodded, "Very well.", and turned around to leave.

Wow. She quickly accepted it.

Should I throw her a lifeline? I could use her guilt to my advantage in the future. That is if I am alive after three years.

Let's try it.

"Wait.", I called out. She stopped and looked back, "What is it?"

"If I come back alive from the north. I might be willing to give you a chance. So until then, be well."

Did I just see a glint of hope in her eyes? Looks like I need to adjust the brightness of my lights later.

She curtly nodded, "Alright.", and left my room.

"Goodbye Mordred. Be well."

"Goodbye, your Highness.", I said with a small bow and closed the door. I leaned against it and slid to the floor, sighing in relief.

"Pheeewww. That went well."