We can always start again

Owen's P.O.V.

And then I realized I could feel Vlad. He still fainted, he is not in pain, But I can feel him. He is lying down. But I can feel him, I can feel Vlad.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry for everything," I said to Vlad, but I'm sure he did not listen. But I will not do the same thing twice, I'm never gonna do anything that would hurt Vlad, never.

I was lost in my thoughts and didn't realize when I reached my home. I opened the door and said, "I'm home.". I heard people running and in an instant, my family was standing in front of me.

"Where have you been? Do you even know how worried we were?" My mom said. She has been crying, also my father and Hailey looked like they cried.

"I was exploring the town, so many things have changed over these five years." I lied. What, I was not going to say that I was at the hideout of the wizard I helped five years back and I fainted there when he removed the spell he cast on me five years ago. "Why did anything happen?" I asked.

"Well, you say. Your son comes home after five years who did not step a foot in the town all those years and who does not have any friends in the town and he disappeared for an entire day. What were we supposed to think?" my mom sounded angry.

"Aw...were you worried that someone might have killed me?" I asked as I entered the living room trying to make a joke.

"Don't say something like that. You know how worried we all were?" my dad said in an angry tone.

"Yes. You could have at least told me, imagine how surprised I was when I did not see you in the house." Added Hailey.

"Okay, okay. I will inform you if I am running late. But you guys do know that I'm not the same child who was bullied anymore. I have lived on my own for five years and I survived. I can take care of myself." I said. Well, I was a little offended now by the way they treated me. They were surprised like the realization just hit them That I have grown up. No one dared to speak. "So please don't worry anymore. I'll be fine. I'm going to my room, I'm tired and I had dinner, I'm gonna sleep like a log." I said as I went into my room closing the door behind me. My heart was racing I will not be able to sleep tonight.

I lay on my bed and start surfing my phone trying to not think about things. Things like me and Vlad, his pain, my pain, my mate, Jason. He does not seem like he was in high school, it feels like he has changed. Wait... the thought hit like a giant stone on my head. If Vlad was suffering because he was not able to be by his mate then Jason's wolf must have been suffering the same. Ad if I was not in pain because of the spell Jess cast on me, that means Jason must have been in the same pain for the past five years.

Oh my God, how many people I have hurt? His wolf did nothing wrong, Vlad did nothing wrong. But because of my selfish goal, they had to suffer. And how was Jason able to survive the pain? How did he endure that for five years, I could barely endure it for seconds? He did some bad things but he did not deserve to be in this much pain. And why did he say nothing over the years? Why did he say nothing even after he saw me? Why did he say that I do not have to love him back? Why did he endure it without uttering a word, without even letting me realize that he was hurting so much? I said he is a monster, I told him he will always be a monster for me, but in reality, I'm the monster. How can I hurt someone so bad?

I was crying, tears would not stop flowing from my eyes and my voice would not come from my mouth, even when I sobbed only air came out. I buried my head in the pillow. I don't know if I was angry with myself, hating myself, or feeling sorry for Vlad, Jason, and his wolf. I don't know. I just know that I'm a monster. I can't live like that. I don't deserve to live, but I can't die either. I can't let things be the same anymore. It has to change.

I just don't know what to do anymore? I don't know if what I do is right? I don't know how things bad are and I don't know if things could ever go the way they are supposed to.

I kept thinking about all the things I did to Jason and how he must hate me now. I thought every possible bad thing that could happen and just like that, I don't know when but I drifted into sleep.

The next morning I woke up and almost jumped off my bed. I don't remember what I dreamed of but it was a really bad dream. And all the things from yesterday came flooding back. I almost cried but then I felt Vlad. He was conscious not. He was still laying trying to cover his head with his paws.

"Hey, buddy," I said, Vlad did not show any movement. It does not matter, I did him wrong. "I'm sorry, I'm really, really sorry. I had no idea you were suffering this much. I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry but I will listen to you now. I know I need to say so much more, I need to do so much more. But I'm sorry that's all I can say right now. I don't know what to do, what to say, I don't even know what to feel anymore." A tear dropped from my right eye. Vlad finally looked up, he was teary.

"It's all right. I know you had no idea about things." He said. And I lost it. After all the things he endured because of me, he just forgave me like that. I don't deserve him.

"No...No... You were hurting so much because of me. We were supposed to be partners, we were supposed to help each other, save each other. But I hurt you most in the world. How can you forgive me, how can I forgive myself." I was crying hysterically.

"It's fine, as long as you realize that, we can always start again." He said with a comforting smile. I imagined myself hugging him. He is so nice, he is so nice to me. I'm never letting anyone hurt him, not even myself.

I grabbed my phone. I was about to place a call when someone knocked on my door, I can say from the smell that it is my mom. I cleared my eyes and said, "Come in."

My mom entered my room, she was wearing her formal clothing, she was about to leave for office. "Honey, look I'm not gonna say anything about last night, we all were at fault so let's just forget it ever happened." She said. "I just wanted to inform you that we met Mr. Wilson, yesterday. Do you know the most popular architect in our pack? He is well known for his mastery in mansions." She paused.

"Yes, yes. He is well known in the field. His designs especially for large buildings are famous in the country." I said, now giving her my full attention.

"Ya, so we met him yesterday and we had a little chat. We showed a picture of some of the models you made and guess what. He wants to meet you, he offered you an internship. It would be for three months and you will have to pass the interview first but if you succeed, you will have the opportunity to work at one of the best architectural firms in the country." He was practically jumping from happiness. I would have been in the seventh heaven when I hear that if I was not a wreak right now.

"That's great news, mom," I said trying to sound as much excited as possible, and hugged her.

"Isn't it? The interview will be on Friday, this Friday. I'll text you the address." She said.

"You mean this Friday, like the day after tomorrow?" I was shocked. She nodded. "Omg, I have no time to prepare."

"You will be fine. Okay, I gotta go, I'm already late for the office." She said and went out of my room.

How am I gonna prepare for the interview? But there was something more important going in my head and then I had a great idea. I took my phone and placed the call.

"Hello?" said a feminine voice.

"Hello, Mrs.Violet. Owen here." I said.

"Oh, Owen How are you? Are you enjoying the town?" She asked.

"Yes, Yes. I'm enjoying my time here very much." I replied.

"That's nice to hear." She said.

"Well, Mrs.Violet. Are you at the packhouse?" I asked shyly.

"Yes, Is there a matter?" She asked.

"Um... is alpha there, I wanted to talk to him but I do not have his number," I said in a low voice, my heart was beating like a drum.

"Yes, he just went into his office. Wait a minute, let me see if he is free." She said and put my call on hold.

After a while, someone again picked up the phone.

"Hello? Owen?" It was a masculine voice, and Vlad started howling on hearing it, my heart felt like it would jump out of my chest and I knew who it was.

"Yes...Jason?" I was feeling guilty, I was feeling bad I was feeling shy but I have to do this.

"... ... ... ... ..." He was not saying anything.

"Hello, are you there?" I asked, I was sweating. Vlad was going crazy, he was running all around the place and howling, he did some backflips too.

"Yes...Yes... I'm here." He said, he sounded nervous.

"uuummm...you see... I have this interview... at... Mr. Wilson's firm... so I was thinking...if... you could drop me there... only if you are free and want to..." I said I'm literally dying.

"... ... ... ... ..." He was again silent.