CHAPTER 25: Like I Never Loved You at All

Ada's and Gary story

Gary is been busy lately, with restrictions still being lifted amid keeping lower cases of the pandemic being spread, his schedule experienced another re-scheduling. Amongst his interests, like the workaholic he is, found other interests he found out to have besides song writing and playing with the band.

Other than just creating a series of online courses for songwriting, found another secret interest: cooking. Having worked on a couple of cooking books and tv shows during his time off the band, a new interest found its niche on Gary's plans.

Being that distant again, made Gary like he never loved Ada at all….

Why hesitation? Their love has strong loving feelings towards each other. The both feelings do complete in their love relationship, no room for hesitation is allowed. Although they have constantly kept in touch when far away; either job or gigs related, they kept their love flame alive.

His new tv shows and other new projects left him with a bad taste on his xq mouth; many things both did together, silly games like naming stars after each other's name… claiming them as theirs….

Although Gary was busy coordinating, cooking, rehearsing, writing, composing, playing at his concerts, felt like something was missing…. Was his heart was longing for his lost love?

Who will be there when he feels down? Someone to keep him company?

Are we loosing our connection?

The stars we named after, the long talks we had to after midnight, the silly talks….

Without her around, I feel my life is becoming complicated…..

My days are not complete without her, her smile, her laugh, her touch.

Everyday I live it's becoming longer….

I miss her.

I miss her lots….

She's not around to hear my call…..

On the other side of the world, Ada was thinking about the last conversation she had with Gary.

I want Gary back for good, forever, together….

Like the old times.

She longed as much as Gary to be back together, this time forever. No more discussions, more miss understanding….those moments where they felt both being at the top of the world. Whatever it was said either Gary or Ada's discussion, was never meant it. Miss understanding happens when under pressure. Both busy schedule made things stressful, but with proper talking on both parties, the differences could be solved and/or fixed.

We both just need to listen, talk, come down to an agreement and understanding, then both will be good.

Back for good.

Ada's day was turning out to be a long day. Coordinating the new shows and concerts was not going to be easy, more concerts snd presentations needed to be schedule as normal activities started to settle down.

Hopefully, pandemic stressful times are long time gone now….

But that invisible way called distance was building and strengthening an invisible enemy, doubt started to creep out slowly on Ada's mind…..

Will she be able to sleep tonight?

Will she be able to fall asleep on Gary's chest as always after having sex and fall defeated out of tiredness after a king night of becoming one in all possible ways and means and enjoying each other the only way they both know, until no more?

Was this the last time?

No more surrender on each others arms and desires?

Gary wished he lied to her, showing to her the way it shouldn't be, showed to her the way the love they had shouldn't be….

He wished he could've lied to her, to evade every possible way that could've attached him to her, to forget her. Gary wished Ada lied to him, to stop all the pain the imminent break up was about to be disclosed….

The days they both shared, now memories.

Are we going to be strangers from now on?

How did we loose our way? Is this the start of separate lives?

Oh is it only me now? What happened to all the things we used to shared?!

No one is there to answer my call

No one to catch me if I fall

It's like I never loved you at all ...

Ada looked at herself in the mirror, looking at herself all alone, loneliness invaded her heart and soul. She just leaned against the frame of the bathroom door…. Looking at the fog her warm shower produced, make her remember the last time they both took their last shower together, their last time they both were there standing up looking at each other, and slowly became one again.

That kiss that initiated everything, that hesitation triggered by the lingering thoughts of now being sure of when, how or where they will be able to be together again.

Said it all, nothing to say at all. Nothing that really matters…. Ada looked at Gary's eyes, teared by the thought of when found be the next time they will see each other again. Their schedules, again, to be a big mess, conflicting times due to different regions and countries where they each had to travel to, were to again, weaken their love relationship.

-our love is strong

Thought Gary

Our connection, like no other.

We care for each other

We are made for each other

-here I am, trying to tell you how much I care Ada, how much I really love you.. I know you wanna be my salvation, my love, my world.

You are always in my thoughts, in everything I do, everywhere I go, every breath I take. every move I make…