The Hokage's Headache: Why Did I Hire These Kids?

Two Days Later...

After two exhausting days of training, Team Seven could now walk up trees and across lakes like it was nothing. It was a far cry from the wobbly attempts on the first day.

But mastering the art of sticking just one finger to a tree? That was another beast entirely. It required a level of chakra control that was borderline impossible for most. Even Sakura could only hold a single finger to the bark for a split second before falling off.

And even some special Jōnin were struggling with it. It was a technique that Tsunade herself had perfected and then passed down as a foundational lesson.

Under the hot sun, Team Seven felt the burn of hard work.

Hokage's Office

"Grandpa Third Hokage, I'm a ninja now! I'm ready for some serious missions—like catching bandits!" Naruto shouted, sitting cross-legged on the floor, folding his arms as if he were some seasoned veteran.

"If you don't give us a tough mission, I'll just sleep here tonight!" he added, puffing out his chest. After two days of training, he felt like he could take on a mountain.

"Don't embarrass Master Hokage, you idiot!" Sakura snapped, hitting him on the arm. Her patience was running thin. Sure, she understood that they had to start small, but another week of baby-sitting missions would drive her mad.

Sasuke didn't even bother responding. His desire for strength spoke louder than any complaints. He just wanted to get stronger, fast.

"Hey, didn't I teach you to respect your elders?" Gojo Satoru strolled in, hands in his pockets, his grin wide and mischievous as he bent over to tug at Sarutobi Hiruzen's beard. "What if I die from anger? What then?"

Team Seven blinked in stunned silence. Gojo had just grabbed the Hokage's beard and was mocking him. Oh, how we loved the "respectful" behavior of the great Gojo Satoru.

Sarutobi Hiruzen's expression twitched, his patience strained. He took a long puff of his cigarette before exhaling, his calm demeanor slightly cracking.

"Don't worry, even though I'm getting old, my spirit is as strong as ever." he said, walking to the window and clasping his hands behind his back. "Listen, Genin, the Will of Fire is what keeps this village safe. Even the smallest flame can light the way through the darkness."

He turned back to the team with a soft smile. "Impatience won't make you stronger. It'll lead you into the darkness." For a moment, he thought of his old student Orochimaru.

"Burn the leaves, even with the faintest fire, and soon new leaves will sprout." he continued, his voice taking on a nostalgic tone. "Only by understanding the Will of Fire can you truly be called a righteous ninja."

Gojo, standing off to the side, raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, yeah, fire and leaves and all that." He casually draped an arm over his students' shoulders. "But how about we skip the whole lecture and go grab some ramen?"

"Gojo!" Sarutobi Hiruzen's patience was wearing thin. The Hokage's scowl deepened.

"Burn the fire, light the village—got it," Gojo said with a mock-somber tone, as though he were taking the Hokage's speech seriously. "But, you know, maybe we should focus on being the most awesome ninjas and skip all that boring philosophy stuff. Team Seven, what do you think?"

Hiruzen's eye twitched, but Gojo wasn't done yet. He turned to Naruto and mimicked his voice. "Hey, I'm Naruto Uzumaki! I want to be Hokage! Don't give me any small missions, just give me a real challenge!" Naruto's eyes lit up as he nodded vigorously.

"You're right, Grandpa Third Hokage! D-rank is for babies! I want to do something important!" Naruto declared, his fist raised in excitement.

Sarutobi Hiruzen couldn't take it anymore. "Gojo Satoru, can you please stop?"

Gojo then leaned in toward Sasuke and mimicked him too, his tone flat and brooding, "I'm Sasuke Uchiha. I'm seeking revenge. I don't care about all your grand speeches. Just give me a tough mission already." Sasuke, while embarrassed, didn't bother correcting him. The truth was, he was ready for something more challenging.

Next, Gojo turned to Sakura and gave her the same treatment, "Wow, Gojo-sensei is soooo cool! I want to fight strong enemies and show off! Who needs to listen to the old man?"

"Gojo-sensei, seriously, stop." Sakura groaned, her face turning bright red. She wanted to dig a hole and disappear into it.

Sarutobi Hiruzen's face was now a perfect picture of frustration. "Gojo, please, for the love of all things good in the village, can you behave for one second?"

Sarutobi Hiruzen let out a long, slow breath, clearly exhausted by his antics. "Alright, alright, I've had enough. There's a C-rank escort mission for your team. Consider yourselves lucky."

"Escort mission?! Are you serious?" Naruto groaned, already slumping in disappointment.

"Mr. Tazuna, please come in. Your ninja escorts are ready." Sarutobi Hiruzen called with an exasperated sigh.

The door creaked open and in stumbled an elderly man, clearly worse for wear. His hair was a tangled mess, his glasses perched precariously on his nose, and he was clutching a wine bottle in one hand.

"Are these kids my escorts?" Tazuna squinted at the team, eyeing them with mild skepticism. "They look a little... frail. Can Genins really protect me on the way to the Land of Waves?"

Naruto immediately shot up. "What?!" he shouted, his fist clenched in anger. "You think we're weak?! You're the one who looks like you're one gust of wind away from falling over!"

Sakura quickly grabbed his arm, shooting him a look that said not now. "Respect the client, Naruto!" she hissed under her breath.

"Yeah, yeah, don't worry about him, Tazuna." Gojo said with a lazy wave of his hand, holding up the mission file like it was no big deal. "But just so you know, the 10,000 Ryo you're offering only covers the three Genin. I'm just supervising here. If you want me to personally escort you, well, that's gonna cost you 10 million Ryo.Just for me." He smirked dramatically.

Team Seven stared at him in stunned silence.

"Ten... million?" Tazuna stammered, his eyes wide as he glanced back at the Hokage. "Is that how much he charges?"

Hiruzen nodded with a barely contained sigh. "Yes... Gojo Satoru's fees are... something else."

Naruto's eyes sparkled. "Ten million? How many bowls of ramen can I buy with that?"

Tazuna's face paled at the thought, but he quickly dismissed it. "Well, if it's that expensive, I suppose I'll just have to stick with the brats then."

With a final dramatic flourish, Gojo said, "Alright, alright, I'll come along. But if anything happens, remember who really saved you."

Tazuna nodded in defeat, then took another swig from his wine bottle. "I'll try to keep up... Thanks, I guess."

Naruto wasn't happy, still grumbling under his breath, but Gojo cut in before it got out of hand. "You know, Naruto, if you're going to do this, you should at least ask yourself—are those bandits really just bandits?"

Tazuna hesitated before responding. "Yes... They're definitely just bandits."

Gojo tilted his head with a devilish smile. "Sure about that?"

The adventure was about to get a lot more interesting.

Tazuna hesitated, eyeing Gojo warily, before nodding a little too quickly. "Definitely... just bandits." he mumbled, his earlier confidence faltering under Gojo's piercing gaze.

Gojo raised an eyebrow, clearly not convinced. "Right, just bandits," he said, putting an exaggerated emphasis on the words, making it clear he didn't buy it for a second. "Well, whatever you say, old man. Let's go save the day."

Naruto, still grumbling, looked over at Gojo and muttered, "I bet I could take down those bandits faster than you can say 'Ten million Ryo.'"

"Don't make me laugh, Naruto. You can barely stick a finger to a tree, and you want to fight bandits?" Gojo teased, ruffling Naruto's hair, much to his annoyance.

"Shut up!" Naruto shot back, swatting his hand away, but there was no heat in his words. He was just excited for the upcoming mission, even if it wasn't the epic battle he had hoped for.

Sasuke, still quiet as ever, simply adjusted his headband, clearly eager to get started. Even if it was a C-rank mission, it was a step toward something bigger for him.

Sakura crossed her arms, a little less annoyed than before but still not thrilled with the situation. "I guess we'll just have to make the best of it. At least it'll get us out of the village." she muttered, more to herself than anyone else.

Hiruzen Sarutobi watched the group with a tired, but fond, smile. "You've got your mission. Remember, the village's reputation rests on your shoulders. Even the smallest task is important."

Gojo waved him off. "Yeah, yeah, Hokage-sama. We'll keep that in mind. But you can't expect us to turn down a good challenge.Right, team?"

"Right!" Naruto and Sakura said together, though with varying degrees of enthusiasm.

Sasuke gave a silent nod, his eyes already ahead, focused on what lay beyond the Hokage's office.

"Then it's settled. You'll leave immediately for the Land of Waves." Sarutobi Hiruzen said, his voice steady despite the growing chaos around him. "I trust you'll all return safely."

"Don't worry about it, Old Man." Gojo grinned, a bit too carefree for someone taking on an unknown mission. "We'll be back before you know it. Just don't send us after cats next time."

With that, Team Seven left the Hokage's office, Naruto leading the way as Gojo lazily followed behind, still grinning like a cat who'd just gotten the cream.

As the door clicked shut behind them, the Third Hokage's smile faltered just slightly, a flash of worry crossing his features. He knew something was off with this mission. It wasn't the simple bandit raid it seemed to be. But Gojo had a way of handling things, and he had complete faith that the team—especially with their unpredictable teacher—would make it through.

Outside the Hokage Building

Team Seven stood at the gates of the village, ready to leave for the Land of Waves. The mission ahead was shrouded in mystery, and the more Gojo poked fun at it, the more nervous Tazuna seemed to get.

"Alright, everyone." Gojo clapped his hands loudly to get everyone's attention, "Let's get this party started! We've got a village to protect, bandits to beat up, and ramen to eat once we're done." He winked at Naruto, who was already licking his lips in anticipation.

Sasuke merely rolled his eyes but said nothing, his thoughts already on the mission ahead.

Sakura took a deep breath, adjusting her gear. She was ready to prove herself, even if the mission was boring. "Let's just make it through without causing too much trouble." she said, glancing nervously at Tazuna. "Right?"

Tazuna nodded quickly, though his nerves were getting the better of him. "Just... just stick close, alright? The Land of Waves isn't as safe as it used to be."

Gojo's grin widened as he eyed the man. "We'll be fine. Just stick with us, old man. But seriously, tell us the truth about what's going on."

Tazuna hesitated again, but when he saw Gojo's serious expression for the first time, his resolve seemed to break. "Fine. There's more to this than just bandits. The people trying to kill me are working for someone much worse. Someone powerful... someone dangerous."

"Figured as much." Gojo said with a shrug, looking unbothered. "But it'll be fun. A little chaos always spices things up, right?"

Naruto pumped his fist. "Let's go already! I want to get started! These 'bandits' won't know what hit 'em!"

Gojo chuckled, his hand resting on Naruto's shoulder. "That's the spirit, kid. Alright, Team Seven, let's make this an interesting trip. You're all going to need a lot more than chakra control if we run into anything crazy."

And with that, Team Seven set out toward the Land of Waves, the air thick with both excitement and uncertainty. Gojo's carefree attitude masked the storm that was brewing, but whatever lay ahead, Team Seven was ready—sort of.

It wouldn't be long before they found out just how dangerous their "escort" mission really was.