"Around the 1800s these epic magic gamer girls called the Einzbern family figured out a way to the Root of Akasha, that place that gives you True epic gamer Magic."
"By using the Holy Grail to summon seven Heroic spirits and then sacrificing them and then using that mana to summon an even greater Grail called... the greater Grail which has access to the Root of Akasha."
"But of course, all the magic gamer girls and boys couldn't agree on who would actually get access to this Magic so they decided to have a meeting together, where they brutally murder each other to death or in simple terms the Holy Grail War."
"Which leads us to the timelines to all the wars so far,"
"Ok, so you got like the First Holy Grail War which happened around the 1800s, this is when the three main mage families The Einzberns, The Tohsakas, and The Matous, couldn't agree on who would get the Grail so they were like, "Guys, we got a bunch of servants lying around, tournament arc, tournament arc, TOURNAMENT ARC!!!!!"
"This was hardly what you would call an actual war and more like a 3 a.m. roll at the local mage pub, which ended cause everyone got bored and time ran out..."
'...Seriously?'
"Then came the Second Holy Grail War in the 1860s with the same parties involved, but this time everyone went a bit... f**king mental, because everyone died. Nobody won. And future generations were like, "Wait a minute, do we need rules? What the f**k is a Geneva Convention?"
(A/N: Well, that escalated quickly. Also, Geneva Convention is like, "I am outside the fight now or unable to fight.")
"Then came the third Holy Grail War in the 1930s where the church gets involved because they are just like, "Um... Are you using the term, 'Holy. Grail'... God are we allowed to copy strike that?" and everyone is happy with that cause they can enforce the rules so the church is like,
"Alright gamers, I want a fair fight, no going for the eyes, no kicking the balls and for god's sake no summoning any illegal servants which may or may not corrupt the Grail into killing all humanity instead of granting a wish... So then the Einzbern family summoned an illegal servant,"
(A/N: Wow, that escalated a lot quicker, didn't it?)
'Wait what?'
'Those dumbasses.'
"And so they get this totally new servant called Angra Mainyu aka the Angry Mango, who is meant to be this super strong, badass, ultra op new servant who also wins the War except lol jk is super weak and dies... and is literally so angry it gives the Grail food poisoning."
"Then we got the Fourth Holy Grail War (Fate/Zero), which is your usual Holy Grail War, except some outside parties also get involved this time."
"And finally, we have the last of all, the most confusing Holy Grail War in the history of Holy Grail Wars aka the events of Fate/Stay Night, and oppai dragon still haunts my nightmares."
"What's important is that this war has three different timelines, which are the Fate route, the Unlimited Blade Works, and Heaven's Feel, or to put it more simply,
"Archer not trying to kill Shirou."
"Archer trying to kill Shirou."
"And Archer killing himself to not let Shirou be killed. Makes sense right? If it doesn't, don't worry about it."
'Yeah, I am just gonna ignore that.' thought the characters of Fate/Stay Night, especially Archer and Shirou.
"But it doesn't stop there, cause next we have Fate/Hollow Ataraxia, which is the events 6 months after the Fifth Holy Grail War."
"So you may be wondering which one of the three timelines it follows, and the answer is... Yes."
"So Rin from Fate/Stay Night is doing some magic experiment, and... she does a little oopsie and um... completely f**ks up the space-time continuum."
Everybody stared at Rin like she was some kind of freak, which made all three of her hide their face in embarrassment.
"Merging all parallel Universe together and I know what you're thinking, this doesn't sound like a little oopsie, this sounds a bit more like a... big oopsie, so we are following this mage called Bazett who was dead during the War and she is now alive along with Angra Mainyu aka the Angry Mango."
"And they're stuck in a time loop, living the same four days over and over and she has to find a way to escape without fading from existence because she was originally dead and I guess people die if they don't exist."
"Since most of this takes place in a time loop, this is basically just Fate Re: Zero Edition, so you can essentially just call it Fate/Zero... Wait."
"And you know what? That is basically everything from the Fateverse, woo, we did it guys, woo, that was pretty simple, right, guys? What are we missing?" A bunch of posters pop up on the screen behind Satoru. "F**k."
"Of course, we are going to have to fill this timeline with all the other Fate timelines, but before that, I have some medicines to take along with a 10-minute therapy session, so while I am out, enjoy this video named, "How I made 10000 villagers worship me in Minecraft."..."
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Gudako: I told you we were fictional characters all along.
Gudao: I'm sorry for not believing you, me.
Mashu: I'm sorry too, Senpai.
Gudako: So, as an apology, maybe wanna you know~
Mashu: Sorry, Senpai, I can't *Runs off*
Gudako: ...Sooo, wanna help do VR Mashu. You as me and I as Mashu.
Gudao: How about you as me and I as Mashu.
Gudako: ...Sounds... Good.
A/N: Can I join you guys.
Gudao and Gudako: ...
A/N: I have got an Advance VR Tech which has some good spec. *Shows specs to them both.*
Gudao and Gudako: ...*look at each other* *nods* You son of a bi#ch you're in.
Credits to UwUami for Proofreading and Editing this Chapter.