sleepover

1 whole year passes, so fast it could've been a day. Nothing major happens at all…. Infact me and Lucas get a little closer and Yuta doesn't talk about the past event of me and him. My feelings for him continue to grow, I even manage to accept that I'm gay which has taken a while, shadowing everything else in my life and pushing me to apply for a second year with Yuta at sixth form. Now my life is going smooth, my grades have rocketed and the bullying isn't consistent.

But then there's Adam.

The entire time he's been here he stares at me and watches me when I'm not looking, seemingly increasingly distressed and sad. He bothers me, making me feel scared for him and his safety… but most of all he reminds me that the person I love is a walking demon. I don't want to know whether Yuta is a criminal, a demon or a monster or whatever the fuck he wants to be. I love him, and that's what love is.

Summoning alot of courage one time before summer break, I approach Adam in the boys' toilets and just stand facing him without saying a word. He doesn't say a word either. The silence is long before I break it, saying;

"Hi."

"Hello.." Adam replies timidly, itching the back of his neck. As his sleeve raises slightly I see huge red mark going up his arm like a fresh burn. I swallow and pull my eyes away from it quickly.

"Um.. remember we spoke before, at the ice cream parlour." I try to get him to talk about what he meant by 'don't,' which is a faint memory now.

"Yes." Adam says to my relief… but then the silence continues.

"Do you know Yuta?" I finally push.

"Yes." Adam says again.

"How come?"

Adam looks greatly uncomfortable and keeps itching his neck. After a few seconds of no response, I try again.

"How did you meet? And, are you close dyou mind me asking..?"

Adam is about to say something when he suddenly coughs up and huge amount of blood, doubling over and choking.

Panicked, I reach out to help when the door to the bathroom swings open and Yuta barges in. I get distracted by his angered looking face and his hard, heavy footsteps.

"Let's get out of here." He nods to the door and I obey immediately. I feel a pang of guilt for leaving Adam there without even helping, but then again I keep reminding myself that my reputation with Yuta is more important than that. I want him to feel proud of me and I want to feel proud of him too.

"I-is he gonna be okay?" I finally pluck up the courage to murmur as we charge through the corridor. "You think?"

Yuta stares down at me with a look of disgust, not answering my question and making me scold myself internally for asking.

"Hey, wanna spend the night at my place?" Yuta asks suddenly after a while. I ponder if I do or not.

"Yeah, I guess. Will it be just us?" I reply.

"Yes if you want." Yuta has a faint smirk on his face that makes my insides curl and my breath get caught. "I'm doing what you want, you know."

"Sure then." I feel that part of my brain nagging at me. 'You're doing it again, you idiot. Get your head around the game and just break away from him.'

"It's just a fucking sleepover," I accidentally murmur out loud while frustrating over my thoughts. "Nothing more."

"Who knows." Yuta gets a tight grip around my waist and smirks with pride at the short gasp he gets from me. "You'll have to find out, won't you?"

_

(Time skip, Yuta's house at 8pm)

I must admit I am nervous. I avoid looking at the portraits on my way through the house, accidentally noticing that a few more have been added to the collection and Adams face is now stained with black tears that look fresh. This is a major red flag- which, I'm ashamed, I ignore.

Yuta offers me water and crisps which I dissaccept, and upon my refusals he makes me watch a film with him to loosen up.

Right now I'm lying in the crook of his elbow, just gazing up at his beautiful face which from my angle makes him look like a statue. His chuckle as he concentrates on the film in place makes me smile to myself in his happiness.. He's not a monster, he's just who I love. I wish I could show him how much admiration I have for him… I wish I could show off and make him feel so loved and proud that he never wants anyone except me…but dreaming isn't life, I remind myself.

If it was, even your nightmares would come true.

Before I know it I've reached up and kissed Yuta on the cheek. He doesn't react for a second, composing his face while he tries to hide that smirk I just knew was coming.

"Finally found the courage?" He turns his face to me, his smile soft and full of love that gets my tongue tied up and my breath caught. I cant even reply, how dumb.

Yuta draws intimidatingly near, playing with how I draw away in fear and my breath quickens.

"You're cute." He says. But it's low and deep and it's rubbing on something in me that I don't even know exists.

Caught up in the fear of the moment, I spring up and try to scramble off the bed. But that's when I notice Yuta has my wrist, and he flips me below him swinging his whole body over me. I'm scared he might smash me or hurt me by accident… but he seems to know what he's doing. Restraining me like a mad man from getting up again.

"Why don't we make this unforgettable?" He's purring in my face now, stroking my hair back from my head and eyeing me closely.

"This is our first night together. Why don't I show you a few things?"

"Like what.." I manage to breathe, feeling the sweat stuck to my forehead and neck. "Y-yuta.."

"Let me take you to heaven." Yuta is already taking things further, stroking my face… my jawline… my neck and touching my collarbone like it's a valuable object.

I feel dumbfounded and terrified that none of this feels good. I want to go home, I'm scared and I feel like I'm going to be the next Luca case…

My life flashes before my eyes as I watch him remove his t-shirt and tear mine off without any second thought. I'm exposed, infront of the person who I love so much but who seems to have many other plans.

He smirks evelishly and rumbles gently,

"Let the fun begin."