Nearer

'' Well , that's a good question. '' Derrick laughed. Ruth poked him in the stomach.

'' I'm serious! Stop fooling around. '' She made herself sit up. '' Tell me.''

'' You are a beautiful creature. Indecisive , proud , childish , '' He caressed her cheek . '' and even rude sometimes. ''

'' I'm not rude! '' She pushed him away. '' Sorry! ''

'' Do you know what scares me? '' His eyed went plain. '' I'm afraid that in an attempt to satisfy your hearts desires , you'll forget what's always been right in front of you. ''

'' Derrick...I...'' he placed his gentle finger over her lips. The smile on his face , his ecstatic gaze , his lips...they took her breath away.

'' Ruth...I love you. I have loved you and I don't know if I'll ever stop loving you...but ...''

'' But what?...'' She found her voice was nearly muted. Her heart was racing.

'' But...it's time I let my head make decisions for my heart. '' He came close to her and brushed his nose against hers. '' I'm letting you go. I'm letting you have what you want...freely... without anything holding you back. ''

'' What...what do you mean? '' Her throat was dry from the wrenching need to cry. '' Why?''

Derrick could see the tears form in her beautiful eyes. She definitely had feelings for him. Then why was she making things so difficult? His chest was heavy but he had to do this.For how long was he going to keep begging for love? How long was she going to be undecided?

'' Well...I have to save some face. After all , I'm one of this city's most eligible bachelors and playboys. '' He tried to laugh it off but he felt like he was choking. '' Rumour shouldn't spread that I was rejected , repeatedly and repeatedly by a girl. ''

'' So you're letting me go? '' Her eyes were watering. They resembled pearls in the deep blue see. He had to get this done with.

'' I came to make things clear and to say goodbye. From today...I'm only Alec's good friend to you. Nothing more. ''

'' Derr...'' His lips embraced hers in an embrace that made the world stop. He was tender and cold at the same time.

'' Goodbye Ruth.''He looked at her face once more hoping he'd engraved it in him mind and then he left.

'' Alison sweetie! You've gotta start taking your pills seriously. '' Bain tossed a pack of drugs to her. '' How many times should I-''

He was a bit shocked to find Freya standing at his door step. He was shocked but happy and this left a goofy smile on his lips.

'' Sorry I came without informing you. I just couldn't help myself. '' She gave a shy shrug of her shoulder and walked to him. '' What are the pills for? Is she sick? ''

'' Well...no...'' He glanced at Alison and back at Freya. He was a bit uncomfortable taking about these things.

Alison rolled her eyes and sighed. She came to him and pinched his cheeks.

'' Don't worry. It's just my period. I get really bad cramps so Dad usually gets me painkillers. '' She laughed when she realized how awkward Bain was feeling. '' Come on , dad. A massive gang lord like you shouldn't be this timid. You're putting me to shame. ''

'' I... well...'' He did finish his mumbles.

'' Okay , don't explain.'' She kissed his cheek. '' I'm off to Ashley's . We're going out together. '' She gave Freya a brief hug . '' Bye Freya . ''

'' Bye , dear. '' She managed to stop herself from breaking down and hugging her. They both watched her leave.

'' She's very naughty -''

'' How did you manage to raise her? '' Freya suddenly asked. '' Was it hard? ''

Bain threw his arms in the air and shrugged.

'' Honestly , in the beginning , I did not want her. I felt like she was a burden , a huge weight tying down my freedom. '' He sighed. '' But then her warm heart slowly melted my coldness towards her and then soon enough , she became the most important woman in my life. ''

'' You love her alot. '' Freya could see how much he cared for her. She could see all she hoped Ryan would be in Bain.

'' You know , in a business like this , you see many horrible things. Things even devils would fear , so , it's a privilege to have someone who can bring the light into your dark world. '' He smiled. '' And she , she was that person for me.''

He turned to Freya and held her hand. '' And your son is that someone in Gwenie's life. ''

'' And me? What about me? '' She cursed herself inwardly. She knew she was asking a stupid question but yet...'' Who will bring me out of my darkness? ''

Bain was all too familiar with the pain she carries in her blue beady eyes. He wanted to take away all her sorrows and replace them with love , peace , security and belonging but the fact was...she was married. He quickly freed himself from the grasp of her eyes.

'' Freya , you shouldn't have come here. You shouldn't be saying that - '' He was cut short when she kissed him. His body heated up and his head began to spin. What was she doing ?! Why was she doing this ? He fought with himself , trying to stop himself from holding her in his arms , from making her his.

Her lips were so soft. He felt like he'd bruise them if she didn't stop kissing him. He gathered himself and tore himself away. They were both panting , both aroused. He had had a taste , he needed more.

'' Why did you push me away ? '' Freya held him by the collar. '' Why? ''

'' You know why! '' His eyes pierced hers. '' You belong to someone else.''

'' Enough! Enough! '' She yelled. '' I'm tired of hearing this. Can you just , please , just for a second , forget about all this? '' She pulled him in. '' Let's think about us , now. You and me...only us. ''

'' But-'' Yet again he was cut short. She kissed him ....again.