Honking It

Truffles entered the birthday party all sexy and oiled. He was so suave and funny until his shoes squeaked, which made him embarrassed and turned him on, and all the women, because a sexy clown embarrassed is the hottest thing ever.

"Wow!", they all thought as he bent down to pick up his playing cards that he dropped.

"He's got a tight butt," thought the women. "He feels out those shoes. I wonder if anything else is as big as the shoes?"

"Jesus." He thought these women all want me.

Josh thought to himself "Man, why is my mom acting so weird around the birthday clown? It's not like he's gonna become my dad," but Josh did not know that is what would happen because Penelope had a major crush, and it was love at first the sighed at seeing truffles, the clown who was now flexing in front of the mom's who all brought their kids there and the kids thought to themselves that truffles is the coolest clown ever because he is so suave, and so sexy. And so funny, and he's got a tight butt. Truffles did magic to entertain the kids, but most importantly, he did magic to entertain the women as he was the straightest man ever and also a bit metro sexual. Everyone wanted truffles for different reasons, but everyone wanted him - even the dog who was humping his leg.

Truffles, after a long and hard day of being a clown and also being a male model went to the kitchen where he then grabbed a bottle of Chardonnay and poured it open.

Penelope entered and spoke to him, she said, "Hey there, truffles, you are so cool and so sexy. Will you marry me?" and he thought to himself, "why not?"

So then truffles, the clown became Josh's father. And that is where our story begins. You thought chapter one was going to be the way the story begins but no, it is chapter 2 because I said so I'm the narrator.

Truffles did not own a shirt. He never liked shirts; It did not show off his abs. He did, however, like ties, and so when he went to work at another birthday party, he wore a fancy tie that was red he thought to himself, "Now I can't be the slutty little clown that I was before, because I am married," and so he was very faithful to Penelope. And everyone clapped.