Chapter Twenty-Two

I had barely got a wink of sleep the entire night, my mind alive with constant thoughts of Adam, and who he was to me in the past, if he was anything. Why else had he run off, and looked so startled at my question? It had seemed innocent enough, and I pondered my head as to how it could seem negative in anyway, enough to scare a person.

When my alarm clock had gone off, I wanted nothing more than to remain in bed, and stare at the ceiling until the day was over. I didn't want to face Adam in class, especially on my own. Sebastian didn't have class, and at first, I thought I was going to enjoy that, but I had started to second guess that. I was thankful, however, that I didn't have to see Sebastian on my way to school. He was still passed out by the time I was out the door with Alex and Daniel.

Neither of them had said a word the entire ride, and I wasn't sure if that was on my behalf, or if there was something else going on. I didn't have the strength for more bad news to weigh my mind down, so I stayed silent until I said good-bye.

I kept my head down as I navigated my way through the halls. I had been so focused on Adam the entire night, that I hadn't kept in mind that I was going to have to find my classes on my own, and read the map without Sebastian's help. It wasn't too complicated, but the school was still a lot larger than the map had made it look.

As I had made my way through the crowd, my eyes had wandered the halls and roamed the faces of students as they blurred by. No sign of Adam.

Maybe he skipped? I hadn't even made it to class yet, and I was already a nervous wreck. I eventually found the correct room, and I rushed to the back with my head down. I was so determined to just sit down and avoid everything, I hadn't noticed that someone was already seated at the very back.

Adam.

Of course, it was him. He seemed to be the only other person who liked sitting at the very back, though that had just made it easier for every girl in the room to stare at him. I didn't want to look in his eyes, but I was shocked when first seeing him, my eyes instinctively looked into his, and I was captivated instantly.

He didn't bore his usual grin this morning, and his eyes looked somber. There were dark circles under them, like he too had been kept up the entire night.

Was he thinking about last night?

A large part of me hoped he had. Had hoped that he tormented himself over it, as much as I had, even though he had been the one to walk out on me. I replayed the scene in my head, and that alone was enough to raise the anger back in my chest, and I seated myself firmly in front of him. I couldn't look at him any longer.

I could feel the word vomit in the back of my throat. It threatened to push through my lips, and spill every bad thought I wanted to say to him.

"Ava." With one whisper of my name, all that anger was gone. Poof! Up in the air like smoke. "Can we please talk?"

"What is there to talk about? You asked me out, and then ditched me. If you ask me, that said enough, loud and clear." That wasn't what I wanted to say. I wanted to turn around and tell him that he didn't need to say anything, I forgave him.

I heard him pick up his things and move next to me. "I promise I have an explanation for that."

"A reason as to why you just walked out on me, after I had asked you a pretty general question? Had I freaked you out that much?"

I could see the panic on his face as I launched questions at him. What was he worried about? The class had already begun, and I was missing it all. I promised myself I wouldn't get distracted. Adam was making that very hard to fulfill.

He ran a hand down his face in frustration, and gave me a glimpse of just how exhausted he looked.

"I'm sorry, I freaked out at your question. I can explain everything, now is not a great time," he said and flicked his eyes to the front of the class.

"Look, Adam, we just met so I don't expect you to understand anything I am going through, but there is a reason I asked you that question as well. A reason I can't exactly explain, and I'm not sure I'm ready to. All I know is, I'm here for one thing, and that's to focus on school and find out who I am. I don't need any more distractions."

As I had said the words, my chest started to get tight, and by the end I could barely breath. I tried to focus on the front of the class, but my vision started to blur. I had to get out of the class, regardless if I would get in trouble, I could feel a panic attack creeping on me.

Without hesitation, I tossed my books into my bag and made a beeline for the door. I heard the teacher call out after me, but they didn't make a move to stop me. I crashed out into the hallway, and I was thankful it was slightly packed. I pushed my way through, when I heard Adam right behind me.

"Ava, stop, please!" he shouted over the crowd, but it just caused me to push harder. I had no idea where I was going, or if the exit door I had spotted led me out to the front, I shoved it open anyway and ran through until I was on the pavement. I realized I was on the side of the building, just around the corner from the front, where Alex and Daniel had parked. I was a few feet away, when the doors burst open again.

"Wait, Ava!" Adam cried and rushed over to me in 3 long strides. "Please, let me explain."

"What is there to explain, Adam? I asked you a simple question, and you ran off. You could have explained right then, or said you needed a minute, or whatever! You didn't have to just leave me standing there like an idiot." The word vomit from earlier was back, but I didn't have the strength to hold it in. "I thought we were having a really nice time, and then you just went and ditched me."

"We were, Ava, I promise you. It was the best night I've had in months; I've dreamt of it every god damn night! This was my one chance, and I fucked it up." Adam started to ramble under his breath, but I wasn't paying attention to his words.

His voice had changed. He no longer sounded American.

"Y-your voice, I-it…" I couldn't form a proper thought; my mind had turned to mush. Adam clamped his mouth shut instantly, his eyes went wide.

What the hell is going on? I was freaking out inside, but I wasn't entirely sure why. There was a panic in my chest that I couldn't identify where it was coming from.

"Ava, I'm sorry," Adam whispered, but his voice rang clear. A thick, English accent coated his words. He sounded like a completely different person.

A person I knew.

I recognized that voice the moment I finally heard it clearly.

But like every other hint of familiarity, I racked my brain, and found nothing.

"W-who are you?" I asked. "Why are you so interested in me?" My tone started to rise with every word, along with the panic I felt in my chest.

"I can explain everything; I need you to calm down–"

His voice was too much. I knew it, but I didn't. I felt like I had known everything about him; his eyes, his voice, his lips, everything but who he is to me. What that voice means to me, or how those eyes really affect me.

"No! I won't calm down; you're going to explain everything to me now! Who are you? Are you a stalker, an ex-boyfriend, a–"

Adam had crossed the small distance between us in a flash. I felt his soft, hot mouth on mine, capturing my lips in a desperate, hard kiss. Everything in me ignited, and I felt like I was standing in a blazing fire.

I wasn't sure how it happened, but the touch of his lips on mine, awoke more than just butterflies in my stomach.

I remembered everything.

I remembered him.

"Ashton."