Chp.19: Stephanie

Darbi was walking along the river bank, watching the waves crashing on it. The crystalline water gleamed in the summer sunlight and through it the dragon could clearly see moving shadows, often gathering in large groups that colored the river's surface with a silvery hue.

Darbi walked for a few more minutes, then as soon as he noticed a fairly large group of shadows, he jumped into the water and swam at full speed towards it. Very soon the fish began to be thrown into the air as the dragon moved its tail generating powerful shock waves that stunned them. When he was done, he dragged all his prey to the shore. In total, he had caught over a hundred trout in one shot.

Darbi went fishing once a day, and usually managed to catch thousands of fish at a time. Fortunately during the summer the river abounded with schools of trout which migrated for the purpose of spawning. All those fish obviously went to improve food supplies; even if they already had enough provisions available, it was always better to be prevented, and even if they weren't served those fish could still be useful after reaching the Thul Oasis. Darbi knew how much effort Haku was putting into finding the most supplies so that their future community could easily learn how to make their own food, so he didn't mind helping him that way, even if it was a very small amount of help given the number of mouths to feed.

Darbi also didn't mind those moments of fishing: they helped him to distract himself a bit. In the previous three days he had tried several times to talk again with Tzegorn and his companions, but unfortunately none of these discussions had been successful; they had never parted on bad terms, but the tigermen seemed unable not to eye Darbi suspiciously. Gord had interceded many times and succeeded in making the tigermen less hostile, but even he could not work miracles and had not been able to eliminate their distrust. Misune had also tried to help him, but for obvious reasons her efforts had been fruitless. Darbi no longer knew what to do; perhaps the best thing was to simply wait for Brenno's arrival, which was very close by now, and then all set sail together to rejoin the main army, where he could leave it to Zamor and Haku to handle the problem.

Yeah, Haku...

The previous night his brother had come to see him using the same avatar as Sisna. Darbi had been surprised to see him: Haku had never contacted him in person, not even once. Usually it was he who used an avatar to talk to his brother. Darbi suspected that Haku was sulking, first for the trick he had played on him by taking Misune away without her consent and then for the mess he had made by suggesting (albeit indirectly) to Rhaegal that he go on a mission with his real body. He had expected Haku to at least scold him, instead he had been much calmer than expected and had limited himself to explaining the situation to him, even if from the tone of his voice it was clear that he was still angry and that he was only avoiding scenes because every moment of time at such a juncture was precious. Thanks to him, Darbi was relieved to find that Rhaegal was fine, that his siblings were close to discovering his whereabouts, and that Haku had found a way around the ransom issue, even if not completely… at least not yet. Given the turn events were taking, Darbi was optimistic that this unfortunate situation would be resolved within the next three days they had available.

However, he had noticed that his brother seemed worried about something. It was clear that he had a lot on his mind. When he'd asked him about it he'd only said he'd been thinking about how to find Rhaegal and how to get around the last ransom condition at the same time, but Darbi was sure there was something else going on. That behavior was what had dissuaded Darbi from asking Haku for any advice on dealing with the tigermen: Darbi already believed that his brother had too many thoughts on his mind before, but now he was certain that it was better not to disturb him with further worries. After all, the tigermen, while they didn't trust him, had agreed to follow the fleet, so they weren't such an urgent problem.

Darbi sometimes wondered how his brother managed to think about so many problems without his brain exploding. But deep down, Haku had always been a hotbed of ideas, plans and calculations. Haku was Haku and as such could operate his head at such an unnerving regime.

So, Darbi was now on the bank, as usual at that hour, intent on putting all the fish he had caught into a dimensional bag. He intended to fish there another hour, but as he was about to dive back into the water his ears warned him that someone was approaching, and from the direction of his steps it was clear that it was coming in his direction; so, intrigued, he simply sat down and munched on a catfish he had caught earlier. He continued to watch the river flowing in front of him, pretending that he hadn't noticed anything to avoid frightening the mysterious visitor, at least until a very small voice called out to him: "Excuse me?"

Darbi turned around and saw a tigerman not far from him. But it wasn't just any tigerman: it was a child. A little girl, actually. She was no more than half a meter tall, a sign that she couldn't have been more than six years old, and she still had the tousled hair typical of young tigermen. She was dressed in simple clothes and her hands were clasped with her fingers nervously squeezing each other. Her eyes were on Darbi and were so wide that they seemed ready to pop out of their sockets. "Uh... are you the dragon traveling with us?"

Darbi couldn't understand what the little girl wanted from him, and above all what she was doing there alone. He wasn't fishing too far from the ships at the moment, but not even too close to avoid disturbing the funerals still taking place on the shore, so it shouldn't be any kid there. "Well, I certainly can't be a cat!" he tried to joke. "How can I help you?"

"Would you be so kind to try to eat me, mister dragon?" was the flat response of the little girl.

"Huh?" Darbi was dumbfounded. He almost expected the little girl to burst out laughing and tease him by telling him he was joking, but instead she continued to look at him with very serious eyes. "Um... I'm sorry, but... I don't eat children" he said, even if this was a half-truth: during his life he had eaten many very young prey, he had exterminated whole dens full of small animals, and he had also eaten a few young ogres. But that was a thing of the past, and at the moment he wanted to refrain from eating children, or at least not those of his allies.

"But my mom used to say that dragons eat people, and that if I wasn't good a bad dragon would come for me at night" the little girl retorted. "I guess that I'm not a big meal for you, but could you make an exception just for this time, please?"

'Everything is wrong! You should ask me otherwise!' Darbi exclaimed in his mind. Now he was no longer understanding anything. "Um... look, I can't do anything without your parents' consent" he said grabbing the first excuse that came to mind, but it seemed ridiculous even to him. "Where are they, by the way?"

"Over there" was the girl's reply, and she pointed to the spot on the bank where funerals were normally held, and from which a column of black smoke was emerging.

That sight was enough for Darbi to finally connect the pieces. "Were you at a funeral for someone you know?"

The little girl nodded. "My older brother didn't survive. He is going to Tharon's realm right now" she replied. "My mom told me that all the tigermen who have proven their worth can feast directly in Tharon's banquet hall, while all the others, while being able to stay in his kingdom, must stay outside that hall full of golden light. My dad says that my brother lost his life while he was protecting his friend from a guard, and therefore he proved his worth. He will therefore be welcomed into Tharon's banquet hall and feast beside the god"

Darbi felt sad for the little girl. "And now you want to join him?" he asked, even though he already guessed the answer.

"Exactly. If I die without proving my worth I cannot enter Tharon's banquet hall and I cannot see my brother again. But if you attack me now and I face you, even if you surely eat me in the end, I will have proved my worth, just like my brother did, and I too will enter Tharon's banquet hall, and I will be able to embrace him again" the child answered.

Darbi didn't know exactly how to act. He empathized with that little girl, but wasn't sure what to say. In the end he decided to try to proceed step by step: "Well, child..."

"My name is Stephanie" the little girl said.

'Oh, it was about time. Finally I can give that face a name' Darbi thought relieved. "Ok, Stephanie, how can I put it... your intentions are good, but I'm afraid you don't quite understand how it works"

Stephanie raised an eyebrow. "Why?"

'Damn, that's creepy!' Darbi thought. He wondered what was going on in the little girl's mind at that moment: he wasn't an expert, but he was sure that manifesting a flat calm immediately after her brother's funeral wasn't a sign of a healty mental state. "Think about it: your brother proved his worth not because he died fighting, but because he protected someone. Everyone is good at dying fighting, but choosing to sacrifice their life for someone else is a sign of great courage and strength. That's why your brother has earned his place in Tharon's banquet hall. But if I ate you now, I would only do it because you asked me to. That proves nothing"

Stephanie cocked her head slightly, and seemed to consider her words. "So if I bring someone here and you try to attack them, and I get in the way to defend them, then I'll go to Tharon's banquet hall?"

'It's getting creepier! A little girl shouldn't have certain thoughts! Even though technically my sisters said much worse things when they weren't even a few months old…' Darbi thought. "No, Stephanie, you didn't understand. To prove your worth, you must perform a selfless act. You have to act only because you want to protect a person. If you now bring someone to me to eat and then you try to defend them, your intent will still be to get me to kill you, and therefore it will count for nothing"

Stephanie looked at him for a few seconds, perhaps trying to process his words well, then she asked: "So how do I do it?"

'At least she's stopped suggesting creepy things' Darbi thought. "Well, you can't do anything. A selfless act can't be planned. Sooner or later there will come a time when you will act mindlessly, just for the sake of someone else, and then you will prove your worth"

"But I want to prove my worth now" Stephanie protested. "I don't want to stay here. I want to go to Tharon's kingdom and eat in the banquet hall with my brother"

"I know, but these are the rules. I can't change them" Darbi replied, even though technically he had actually made it all up in order to prevent her from performing some extreme gesture when no one was watching her.

"But I don't want to stay here" Stephanie repeated again, as if she believed that by continuing to say it she could change the rules however she wanted. "This world is bad"

Darbi bit her lip. "It's not that bad..."

"Yes, on the contrary, it's bad. It's bad and evil" the little girl replied, who was now shaking slightly. "And I want to be able to hug my brother again and fall asleep in his fur. It was warm and pleasant"

Darbi sighed, then he had an idea. He wasn't sure if it would work, but he decided to give it a try anyway. "Come. Sit here next to me, and lean on my belly"

Stephanie obeyed; she didn't even seem to wonder why he was asking that. She approached the body of the dragon, which was more than eight times taller than her, she sat down on the ground and leaned against his belly. But as she did it, her eyes changed, and from blank and emotionless they seemed to glow. The little girl flattened herself even more on the belly of the dragon, until she almost spread herself over it, and finally she whispered: "It's warm"

Darbi smiled slightly. "I don't have fur, but my body gives off a lot of heat and my scales, while hard, aren't too sharp, at least not like they used to be. You can warm yourself using me while thinking about your brother"

Stephanie rubbed even more on the dragon's body. "Thank you" she said. "You aren't as bad as my mom says... or are you just taking your time deciding how to cook me?"

'Enough of these disturbing thoughts!' Darbi screamed in her mind. "I don't eat children, I already told you that" he answered. "Now relax a bit... then we'll talk"

"We'll talk about what?" Stephanie asked.

Darbi snorted. "Life"