"Don't go outside."
"I want to go outside."
"There are monsters outside. They'll bite you as soon as you go up, and strangle you as soon as they lay their hands on you."
"Ling is hungry. Ling wants to eat."
"Don't worry, someone will get you food. There's plenty of millet."
Yan stretched his neck, peering through the window grilles of the western wing. He saw Jun in the courtyard, proudly showing Ling the millet he had brought back.
Yan chuckled silently. He was glad he had found Ling in the garden behind the Third Northern Palace. Such a small bird had brought happiness to Jun's solitary life.
This girl was too easily contented, just like the girl in his heart.
On the night of their departure, he repeatedly gave various instructions, clearly showing his nervousness and reluctance to part. The girl seemed to sense his anxiety, as she tightly held his hand.
However, her four fingers kept scratching his palm incessantly, causing him to feel an unbearable itch. He couldn't help but chuckle, and his nervousness dissipated like smoke.
"That's right, it's no big deal. It's just eloping, after all. We'll definitely succeed."
After she finished speaking, she gave him a warm smile and turned to leave.
Unfortunately, he couldn't foresee the future. If he had known what was to come, he would have never let her go. He would have clung to her and escaped from the city of Beijing that he both loved and hated. He would have abandoned all notions of the secret actions of the Black Robe Society.
He died before the appointed time to meet her. After enduring treacherous trials and navigating through waves of danger, he arrived at the Tanggu wharf as agreed. He tightly held two boat tickets, his eyes fixed on the crowds, never daring to relax.
He had a plan.
As soon as she appeared, he would quickly find the little girl who enjoyed eating candied hawthorns in the waiting hall. He knew that the girl had "Golden Eyes" and could see him. Once he made contact with the little girl, he would give her both boat tickets – one to deliver to his girl along with the message "Yan is waiting for you on the ship," and the other as a reward for her services. He was well aware that his girl was heading to Japan alone, but that was still better than staying in the palace and becoming a pawn.
However, even as the steam whistle of the Da Maru sounded, signalling its departure into the open sea, she still hadn't appeared.
He was in a state of extreme anxiety. He worried that he might have overlooked some crucial detail that prevented his girl from setting off on her journey, and he was even more fearful of some uncontrollable force keeping them apart from now on.
Not seeing her, he decided to turn back from Tanggu. If he could coincidentally meet his girl on the way back to Beijing, he would consider himself lucky. If not, he would return to the Palace and start his search from the backstage of Changyin Pavilion, the place where he and she had parted. He would search inch by inch until he found his beloved.
Once he started taking real action, he realized he couldn't transcend heaven and earth, nor could he freely move between the realms of the living and the dead. He lacked boundless supernatural powers to command the winds and rain, and he couldn't seamlessly travel between two timelines. If he forcefully attempted to cross over, he only knew there would be dire consequences, although the specifics remained unknown to him.
Even if someone were to explain the pros and cons to him, Yan wouldn't halt his search for his girl. He had made a promise to her, to go to an unfamiliar place and lead a joyful life together.
Not finding her presence at Changyin Pavilion, he turned towards the Third Northern Palace.
Just before entering the palace gates, he habitually glanced at the southeast corner. Almost every time he came to find her, she could be found at the well, pulling out weeds, trimming branches, and tending to the flowers.
"You're not afraid?"
He had asked this question to her several times.
"Do you think I'm still the timid little girl from nine years old?"
He smiled knowingly. Her response was rooted in history, originating from a poorly executed prank.
It was the 27th year of Emperor Guangxu's reign. Over a year had passed since Empress Dowager Cixi's return to the palace after her flight to the west. The chaos and disarray of the escape had gradually faded from memory.
Somehow, the Empress Dowager Cixi recalled Consort Zhen, whom she had pushed into a well before leaving. It's unclear whether it was due to guilt or fear, but she insisted on having Consort Zhen's body retrieved from the well and given a proper burial.
On the day of the retrieval, the palace was in a state of high alert, with all gates tightly shut.
He took the opportunity to find her, gleefully describing the scene as if he had been there in person. In truth, he had only heard about it, but his mischievous nature led him to want to tease and scare the girl he liked the most.
His girl pursed her lips, her brows furrowing, and remained silent.
"What's wrong, are you scared?" He hesitated, considering whether he should console her.
"Um, a little. Consort Zhen had just left, and before she did, she whispered something to me…"
He struggled to maintain his composure, swallowing hard. "What did she say?"
"She said that you had orchestrated all of this behind her back and that she would come to find you tonight to have a proper talk."
He jumped as if he had stepped on a snake, leaping about three feet high. When he landed, he nervously glanced around.
His girl burst into laughter, amused that he, with his mouse-like courage, dared to come and frighten the cat. But her laughter quickly subsided, and she sighed, asking him how the Emperor was doing.
"I don't know. He went to the Yingtai island early this morning."
"He didn't take you with him?"
He shook his head. He was Emperor Guangxu's reader and usually liked to accompany him wherever he went. Yet, today, he was left behind while the Emperor went to the isolated island surrounded by water.
"He must be mourning Consort Zhen. The Emperor is truly pitiable, liking someone, wanting someone, yet unable to do so openly."
He suddenly understood and admired his girl's insight. In the span of a year, the once naive girl had learned about the subtleties of affairs of the heart.
"I want to help them..."
He agreed in his heart, but voiced his concern, "The Emperor's feelings for these Consorts, the Empress Dowager Cixi disliked Zhen the most. If you're helping her, aren't you removing a tooth from a tiger's mouth ?"
"If a tiger has a toothache, why not just pull it out? I won't overthink it. I'll do what I believe is right."
"Well then, tell me, how can I help? Count me in."
His girl thought for a moment and said, "Didn't you tell me that the chrysanthemums outside the Emperor's sleeping hall are in full bloom? You could cut a bouquet and I'll place it by the well, as if the Emperor came to pay his respects to Consort Zhen."
Perhaps God took pity on this deeply affectionate couple, for the bouquet of cut chrysanthemums unexpectedly sprouted roots by the well side. His girl thought it was Emperor Guangxu and Consort Zhen showing their presence, so she took extra care of them.
At this moment, the well side was adorned with flowers but bereft of people. Yan felt a mix of worry and dejection. He altered his path to the well and there he found a drooping chrysanthemum, feeble and wilted.
Yan walked over and gently lifted the flower, as though he was lifting his girl's sorrowful face. In that moment, it felt as if he was holding her heartache in his hands, causing his own heart to ache like a sharp knife.
After caressing it for a while, Yan finally let go. The flower seemed to suffer a severed throat as it suddenly fell. He hurriedly inspected it and realized that the stem had been severely damaged, almost severed halfway.
Yan began the task of bracing and binding the flower. When the injured chrysanthemum finally stood tall again, he had missed the opportunity to find his girl once more.
The next day, after going through another round of trials and tribulations, Yan arrived at the Third Northern Palace. This time, he didn't dare to linger.
No one was there.
Yan went to Yu Gege's residence. Occasionally, when she was in a bad mood, she would assign his girl to night duty. Still, she was nowhere to be found.
However, this time Yan noticed a small cloth doll hidden between the curtains and the bedding in the room. As he picked it up to examine, a seemingly inconspicuous silver needle pierced through his hand.
Despite the intense pain, Yan resisted the urge to pull out the needle. He wanted to use it as a reminder to himself that when he saw his girl, he must warn her to be cautious around Yu Gege. She was definitely not the kind-hearted older sister she appeared to be.
In the end, his newly acquired wife descended from the heavens and removed the needle for him. Yan was both annoyed and frustrated. He worried that by removing the needle, he was also removing his vow, and he would never see his girl again.
As expected, on his third infiltration into the Third Northern Palace, apart from finding Ling, Yan once again came up empty-handed. As the saying goes, "Three strikes and you're out." Yan placed all his hopes on today. He took his gown, shook it, and put it on.
There was a sticky spot near the button, and upon closer inspection, Yan saw a small red dot. He knew exactly what it was—this red stain was a gift from Ling.
Ling was famished, and Yan had to return to the Third Northern Palace to get some millet for it. He thought his previous visits had gone unnoticed, but little did he know that this time someone had set a trap for him.
There was a sword placed on top of the bag of millet. Completely unaware of the situation, Yan suspected there might be a mechanism, so he grabbed a feather duster from the storeroom and used it to move the sword aside.
The sword floated lightly, landing without the resounding clang of metal. Yan squatted down to examine it closely and found that the sword was actually a wooden carving, a fake.
Just as he stepped out of the storeroom with the millet, someone poured a bucket of something over his head. It was smelly and sticky, a bit like sour mung bean soup.
"Dog's blood will reveal your true form," a sharp female voice cut through the sticky water, piercing Yan's eardrums.
As it turned out, he had been drenched in dog's blood. Adding that to the previous incident with the wooden sword, Yan suddenly understood his girl's old sister ,Yu Gege's intention. He really wanted to tell her to read more books when she had the time. Using peach wood for warding off evil and the revelation of true form through dog's blood were all baseless superstitions, without any scientific basis.
However, at this moment, Yan had no intention of having a heartfelt conversation with Yu Gege. He remembered there was a small pond in the backyard of the Third Northern Palace . Before heading home, he needed to clean himself up. It wasn't that he was worried about his so called wife's concern; he was worried about her tongue—sharp and quick, like a knife.
Emerging from the water, Yan felt refreshed.
Yet, his eyes were somewhat uncomfortable, as if they were veiled, making everything appear fuzzy and indistinct.
The pond directly faced the sleeping room of the Third Northern Palace. A quick glance caught Yan's attention, and his heart couldn't help but race.
Under the window curtains, there stood a figure admiring herself in a mirror. She bore a striking resemblance to his girl.