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Fate Altering System: I Can Alter Fate with Bullshit!

Kobi was an unfortunate but serious guy. His girlfriend mistook him for cheating and didn't have any desire to make-up. But after his persistent effort, she finally conceded and just when they were about to hit-it off again... he got transmigrated. And his golden finger requested a single thing in turn for sending him back... destruction of the world. But Kobi was a serious and kind man, one called an angel in human skin, so, he could never do such treachery. Hence he set out to destroy the world. His love for his sweetheart was earnest and pure... hence after his separation and finding himself in this hideous plot... he set out to gather his harem. He was a noble and charming warrior... hence he vowed to humiliate every enemy that dared to obstruct him! Filled so much with dignity that even Dignity begged him for some and so pure that he didn't know the S of shamelessness. He remained stoic as he appraised one beauty after another. He made the great elder devils beg him for some tips and the angels to puke blood. Gifted with his hax, and venemous tongue, he set out to gather power and conquer the world... all for his earnest goal to reunite with his sweetheart(s). A few of his noble quotes: "Have you ever seen the sun rise from the south? No? Of course! It's because I wake up in the east!" "When it comes to woman... I am blind! Hence... I follow the earnest motto of Every Hole Is A Goal!" "I don't seek the power to defeat my enemies... but only so little that I can humiliate them!" "When I was born... My father wished to name me Conqueror but my mother wanted to name me Divine... I vomited in loath and rebuked, 'Don't humiliate me, look, the sky has already etched my name on top of the clouds- Rizz nd Hax King'." *** The cover art belongs not to me! If the creator wishes to remove it, please contact me!!

Nikola_Niko · Fantasi
Peringkat tidak cukup
37 Chs

The Village [2]

A wheel appeared in front of Kobi, flashing various items in its many unequal sections, all awaiting to be gifted out on the mere spin of its needle.

Below the wheel was a green "Spin Now" button which kept blinking, almost like a seductive dancer beckoning everyone to embrace her.

"Here's the deal, the rewards on the wheel change day to day. You will be assigned missions everyday, ranging from you slapping yourself to coma or jumping in the mouth of a dragon!"

"The shit are those missions!" Kobi bit his lips and glared at Shik, "It's your scheme isn't it?" Kobi gulped nervously.

Shik grinned evilly and continued, "When you complete your day's missions, you will receive a spin. As soon as the clock strikes 12 at night, your uncompleted commissions will vanish, along with your spin. The rewards will change and new commissions will appear."

"...Any catch?" Kobi raised his brow.

"Not as of yet." Shik shook his head.

"Hmm! So... I got a first timer free spin?" Kobi grinned while glancing at the blinking button.

"Something of the sort!" Shik moved his head closer and glanced at the rewards for today alongside Kobi.

"Humongous Descent, Crippling Pill... what's written in this tiny green line?" Kobi's lips spasmed as he squinted while trying to read what was on the thin green strap almost the size of a pencil.

Shik inched his face closer and read aloud, "One time meteor descend talisman."

Kobi hissed, "Shit, seriously? A real freaking meteor?"

Shik nodded his head with a sly grin.

Kobi's eyes contracted as he focused on something, he strained his eyes so much that things started appearing as two to him, he retreated with a horrified expression and exclaimed in amazement, "I think I hit my head. I am hallucinating that there's a red line here." Kobi smiled foolishly.

"Oh, you aren't hallucinating, there is a red line." Shik stared at Kobi weirdly. Why was he acting so weird, did he hit his head?

"O! Ho-Hoho!" Kobi laughed dryly, "It must be a line for division of sections."

"Huh, no way! Are you dumb? That's a reward as well."

Kobi's eyes blinked involuntarily, "Seriously?"

Shik felt as if something was weird, with sweat on his forehead, he nodded.

Kobi took a deep breath... before yelling, "THE FUCK? ITS THINNER THAN THE SHITTY NEEDLE INSIDE THIS WHEEL, YOU SHITHOLE! WHAT KIND OF A PRANK IS THIS!?"

"Ohhh... hohoho!" Shik turned away sheepishly, brushing his cheek while coughing dryly.

Kobi admired Shik's blush for a while before asking, "Just what is the reward there?"

"Let me see,"Shik moved closer before his eyes widened in understanding, "No way... it's actually a Thousand Strength Stat potion!"

Kobi sucked in cold air, his jaw hanged loose, "There's really such a thing... Hey, putting that into perspective, what can that strength achieve?" Kobi asked curiously.

Shik rubbed his chin before replying, "You can mostly cripple this planet."

Kobi's face turned blank like a sheet, after taking a deep breath to calm his throbbing heart, he spoke in his most composed tone, "FUCK IT! SPIN NOW!

Heeding his commands, a shrine's walls with bells hanging on its roof surrounded the wheel from the sides.

The bells chimmed, causing a gust of wind to blow at Kobi's face along with soothing chimming of the bells.

As the bells echoed, the wheel began to spin.

'Tch! That's some slick cinematic effect!' Kobi nodded in appreciation before gluing his eyes to the wheel.

The wheel's needle passed through various colours, blue, orange, violet, pink, purple. Each containing a different item.

Each time the needle passed a colour, Kobi's heart nearly leapt out of his chest. "RED! RED! RED!"

The needle slowed down and crept atop the blue color. "Red!"

The needle moved forward, "Red!" It moved closer, "Red!" It slowed, "Red!" It arrived at the color before red. Kobi roared to the sky, with halted breath and tense eyes, he muttered again, "Red!"

The needle moved like a snail, the wait made Kobi wanted to curse the skies but the pressure weighing down on him, drenching him head to toe in sweat, didn't allow him the chance.

Kobi felt as if needles were pricking his eyes as he stared, and, with disbelief the needle stopped... at red.

The birds stopped chripping. The clouds stopped moving. The wind stopped blowing. Kobi stopped talking.

Then it appeared, a shrill scream, coming straight from his rampant heart and ripping out his throat's vocals, "RRRREEEDDDDDD!!!"

A smile like none ever stretched across Kobi's face. From his parted lips, all his thirty-two blood-stained teeth greeted the world.

"FUCK, FUCK, FUCK, I FUCKING LOVE YOU SYSTEM! LEMME KISS YOUR SHOE!" Kobi pushed out his lips as if he wanted to lick the shoe clean.

Shik's eyes glowed omniously, his lips curled up as he arrogantly walked towards Kobi, 'There be no next time Shik, reap this chance!'

Shik placed his foot near Kobi's face, some distance from his mouth, so he had to struggle before reaching it.

Still laughing hysterically, thick veins bulged out of Kobi's forehead, he rolled his spit to the tip of his tongue and spat it out, making it accurately fly past Shik's face.

"HAHAHAHA! FUCK YOU BITCH! YOU SHOULD LICK THIS YOUNG MASTER'S BOOT INSTEAD! HOW DARE YOU, DID YOUR MOTHER FORGET TO IMPART MANNERS? YOU WERE A DEFECTED PRODUCT WEREN'T YOU! NOW QUICKLY GIVE ME MY POTION OR I'LL STEAL YOUR GIRL!"

Still in his giddy tone, Kobi hurled curses after curses at the system.

Shik's face darkened into the night, he nodded his head calmly and placed his palm in front of Kobi, on which a mystical glass potion slowly materialized.

The moment it appeared, Kobi's laughter halted, his eyes peeled themselves to the red liquid inside the glass.

"So... so divine! I can... I can see heaven!" Kobi felt as if his world-view was changing.

"U-uncap it!! And you better make sure not even the vapours leave or I'll fuck your children in front of your eyes." Kobi commanded in the most enchanted voice he could muster.

Shik's face tensed futher, but he still heeded and uncapped the bottle.

Kobi's nose twitched like a dog's as he greedily tried to swallow the scent, his eyes glowed as if he was possessed.

"Divine! Th-This scent is divine!" Kobi muttered to himself, his eyes welling up from emotions, "I-If Beauty itself had a physical form, she would smell like this." With an euphoric face, Kobi took the deepest breath of his life. Heck he created a new world record.

Shik bit his lip tightly and cussed, he glanced at the roof and trembled as he Kobi spat praises at this dung like scent.

Shik had the urge to ask just how? How does he do it? But he didn't have the guts and calmly played along.

"Feed me! Pour it in my mouth and remember... you won't be a man anymore from this day on if even the tiniest of vapours fail to grace my tongue."

Shik clicked his tongue, a shiver ran out from his spine hearing such a harsh curse.

He calmly moved the bottle and dripped it, drop-by-drop, onto Kobi's extended, wriggling, tongue.

His tongue danced seductively, telling the liquid it won't find a more better mouth. As if it said, 'Come, lets combine, it's union time, lets become one.'

After finishing the drink, Kobi closed his eyes, he could feel it, his body... he was heating up, he was growing stronger!

"UGHHHH!!" Spit hurled out of Kobi's mouth as he ripped the bandages to shreds and jumped to his feet in the zeal of a booming scream.

"This! This power!" Kobi glanced at his muscular arms.

"Give that here!" Kobi snatched the bottle from Shik's hand and invaded it with his tongue. He went to every nock and cranny and wiped everything clean.

Heck! He even licked the outside of the bottle fearing a tipsy bit might've fallen out.

After cleaning it thoroughly, Kobi hurriedly covered his exposed lower body with the rag and tied the bottle next to his private's, "Its almost as important as you, little brother. Take good care, you are now brothers."

Kobi caressed his brothers lovingly.

"It... it was divine! I swear... if heaven itself had a taste, it would pale in comparison. This is... this is a taste even divine beings would exchange their wives for." Kobi couldn't help but pat them again solemnly.

'Fuck!' Shik glanced at the roof and covered his face, 'Did I actually give him another flavour instead of the urine flavour? Oh God! Save me! He's my host, he should be begging for dear life right now, but oh God! Save me from this monstrosity!'

"Now, system, didn't I say I would return to Earth after escaping that dungeon. Look, look as I decimate this planet." Kobi solemnly pushed back his blonde hair, his face more righteous than a Buddah's statue.

"HIYA!" Kobi's fist connected with the ground with a resolute shout. A cracking sound reverberated out.

"Haha!" Kobi chuckled, his pressed together lips stretched from ear to ear. His serene eyes fixated to his oddly bent fist.

"UGHHH!!" Kobi thrashed around the floor as tears rolled out of his eyes.

"SHIT, SHIT, SHIT, SHIT, SHIT!! WHAT SHITTY URINE DID YOU FEED ME, YOU BITCH!?"

"So you finally realize it was actually urine!" Shik sighed in exasperation.

"FU*k! IT WAS URINE!?" Kobi cussed and jumped to his feet.

He pulled his jaw wide with his hand and shoved his hand inside.

"Gaet ouut! GAET OUUT!!"

Shik laughed like a devil and started recording this memorable scene.

[Blackmail Material At System's Disposal: +1!]

"FHUK UU SIKSTEM!!!"