Partly Cloudy

It`s finally time! Today is the day. I can finally fully run away from my problems.

Alicia and I will be driving down to New York today. We decided to drive so that we don't have to buy another car when we get down there but also we wanted to have one final hurrah just for the two of us. Packing wasn`t difficult I just packed the essentials you know clothes, brush, gel, deodorant, and snacks threw them into my gym bag and was ready to go. Alicia on the other hand seemed to be packing the whole room.

"Alicia, when will you be finished?" I groan plopping onto the bottom bunk of our bunk bed.

"Just give me a minute it`s finally hitting me that my childhood is officially over." She says hugging the pink stuffed bunny she got for her birthday when we were kids. She dabs at her eyes and wipes at tears. That's when I realized this was gonna taking a while.

I get why she`s like that. This place has so many great memories for her. Of course, this is her childhood home. I had some good memories here but for the most part, I just felt like a burden. Two years ago when my mom left. It was a shock to me. I had thought that she was happy. But apparently, I was a problem.

It was the middle of my sophomore year in high school. I came home from school at the regular time because I wanted to get a head start on my homework to beat Keagan. At the time Keagan and I had just started our who can get better grades competition.

But as soon as I opened the door I heard her screaming. Thinking at she was hurt I ran into the kitchen but I was wrongly mistaken. My mom was in the kitchen yelling and screaming at my dad. She was saying something about how actresses get paid twice the amount she was getting paid and they didn`t even have to pretend to care as she did. I realized that my mother didn't really want to be my mother. Later on, I came to also realize that part of the deal my parents had was my mom was not supposed to break character in front of me so when she realized that I was in the room she was livid.

"This is all your fault." She violently spits in my face.

She reaches for a pan and swings it at my face. But my dad shields me using his body. She hits my dad in his head with the pan screaming for him to stop protecting me. Calling us all kinds of nasty names.

My dad had enough of her bullshit he grabs her by her leg and drags her through the house while she is kicking and screaming. He throws her out the door closes it and locks it. She banged on that door all night begging and pleading, trying to get me to open the door but my dad just turned the T.V. up.

I tried talking to him but he just scooped me up in his arms and told me to take a nap. At that moment I was still shocked and scared and the only thing I trusted was my dad's words. I did as he said and I went to sleep. When I woke up the next morning my dad was no longer breathing and my mom was being arrested for murder.

I was told by the lawyer working my case that after I testify against my mom I would be living with my only other living relatives. My mom`s sister. Because of that my new guardians were giving my dad's gym. With the money they were now making, they were able to buy a new house and other things that they could afford before. When I first got there they told me they didn`t care what I did as long as I didn`t tell Alicia about what my mom did and I agreed. I spent most of the rest of Highschool either at Keagan's or at Brice`s. But Keagan was the only one who knew the truth. Well, he did live in my old neighborhood so I couldn't exactly hide it from him. He lived with his grandmother we all called her Nana. She is so sweet.

"Hey, Alicia actually I have something to do," I say slowly unfolding from on the bed.

"Oh, I can-

"By myself." I interrupt her mid-sentence pulling out my phone.

"Hey, ok."

I quickly walk out of our room. Grabbing my keys I walked down to the living room. Auntie is setting the table and uncle in front to the T.V.

"Hey," I think that is the first work I have spoken to them since last month.

They both look up at me and my mind draws a blank. I just look at them as they look up at me but this happens a lot like usual they are very patient and wait while I gain the courage to speak to them again.

"I just wanted to say thank you," I said in a low whisper.

They both look at me shocked now. But I don't feel like I've gotten my point across yet. I raise my voice louder to yell.

"Thank you for inviting me into me your home. Thank you for putting me in a room with your daughter for my emotional stability. Thank you for showing up to every school event I've ever had. Thank you for not selling the gym. Thank you for keeping my house. Thank you for letting me go to Keagan`s house in the middle of the night. Thank you for celebrating my birthday with me. Thank you for all the support of my dreams that you have shown me."

"Living with you was the highlight of my life. But most of all thank you for loving me more than I love myself."

After I finish they wrap me in a warm hug.

"Of course, honey," My auntie said as she held me closer. I didn`t even notice that I was crying until my uncle whipped the tears from my face.

I looked at the clock on the stove and noticed the time. I slowly pulled away from them.

"I have to go," I say slowly.

"Ok be safe." I walk out of the house and climb into my car. Taking a deep breath and steadying myself I put my hands on the wheel and for the first time in forever, I feel like I can breathe well sorta. I could say that my rainy days aren`t so rainy anymore but it is also not sunny. More like partly cloudy.

My car reves and I speed down the road. Driving downtown I see all the places our friend group used to go to and my heart is heavy, I feel like my childhood was being ripped away from me.

I pull into the parking lot and walk into the parlor.

"Alexandra Williams, I wouldn`t expect a straight-A student l like you to be in a place like this. When my phone notification when off I could hardly believe it,"

"Well, I just wanted to honor a memory."

"Well that's what I do, have a seat, what are you feeling."

I take a seat in the chair.

"Today`s giving survivor, freestyle."

"That's my specialty."

-------------------

"I love it. How much." I ask getting out of the chair.

"It`s on the house a than you for all the times you stood up for me or gave me your notes,"

"Oh, no problem I hope we can stay in touch Becky,"

"I would love that,"

Leaving the parlor I made one more stop. The convenience store.

Fake candles, a pack of sparky smelly pens, copy paper, a flashlight, and a single blue balloon.

I got back in my car and drove to my old address.

At my old house, I put the fake candles I bought throughout the overgrown grass in the front yard. My dad and I used to catch the worms in this grass.

I opened up the sparkly smelly pens and grabbed the grape one. Dad loved grape-flavored everything. Ripping open the copy paper I grabbed a sheet and began writing. At this point, I could feel eyes on me but I didn't care what were they going to do to kick me away from my own house.

I finished writing and tied my piece of paper along with a candle to the string of the blue balloon. I read earlier that blue balloons were appropriate for matters like this.

I raised my arm and got on my tippy toes, the balloon desperately tries to fly away from me.

"I Love you, dad." I let the balloon go and watched as it floated into the sky above me the candle glow getting dimmer.

I walk back to my car staring at the black ink now permanent on my arm. A blazing white phoenix.

"To new beginnings."