8 | To Wed or Be Dead

Pain.

I could imagine being hit by lightning more comfortable than this.

My body rested in a foetus position as my sore body ached and trembled in agony. The cage seemed even more smaller now, like my hope. I haven't seen Peter in the past two days I've spent in this cage and a part of me was relieved for it. Seeing him would mean putting up a fight, something I was too weak and tired to do right now. In the mean time, I've been practicing my magic and can almost radiate fire from my palm instantly now. I've noticed the more I used my magic, the less quickly drained out I become.

I do get visitors. Most of the time Ian comes by to give me supper and breakfast and he would sneak me whatever extra food he can. I was grateful for that. I wanted to see Thomas, but I understood that he felt too bad to see me in my condition.

Ian told me that ever since the hunt, Peter hasn't been around The Camp lately. Felix told Ian he was at Skull Rock. I didn't know much about it from my research before coming here, apart from that it was a cave of some sorts. It was separated from the island by the sea at a short distance. Apart from that nothing else has happened.

I questioned a lot of things. Like why Peter intended on keeping me alive. Or what he was going to do with me. I wasn't scared. I didn't fear dying oddly enough. Ever since Marcus went home, all sense of my motives slowly vanished. I felt empty. Like I had no reason to live. Although I didn't have the urge to die, at the same time, I didn't have an urge to live either. As if my whole being was pointless.

Amongst all these thoughts, a ladybug landed on my hand while I was laying in the cage. Although it wasn't much, I found it mildly entertaining. I asked if, "I wonder if fairies paint your black spots."

It flew away and I immediately had a bad feeling about it. I looked in front of me too see Pan in the shadows. I lifted my body up, trying to ignore the pain. His intense glare spoke million words of hatred. He stormed up to me and I cowered away to the back of the cage. I wanted to rip his smirk off his face.

He chuckled, "How's the cage treating you?"

I stayed silent. My goal was not to feed into his taunts.

Ignoring my lack of response, he continued, "My little flower was so bored that she started talking to a bug. How silly."

My face was growing red in embarrassment while he spoke, "I guess your wondering what I've decided to do with you. I've been discussing it with my shadow and-"

I interrupted, "Your shadow?" well... there goes my vow of silence.

He explained, "I detached myself from my shadow so it would have its own entity bound within the island's magic. He works for me and does what I say. That's all you need to know. May I presume?"

His arrogant tone was getting on my nerves, but I nodded to his question. He presumed, "We have discussed two choices for you. Either you live in this cage for eternity and be tortured and punished for you crimes-"

My mind skipped to whatever my other choice would be.

"Or you live at our camp, alongside the lost boys, and will be treated fairly."

Something was up, "What's the catch?" I furrowed my brows.

He was in disgust, "A union between you and I. One that is death till us part..."

I was completely bamboozled. Please tell me he's not on about what I think he is.

He noticed my confusion and spat out, "Marriage."

My eyes widened, "You're absolutely mad."

"Don't flatter yourself. I was hoping you'd take the first option. This was my shadow's idea. He believes that if we wed, then it could potentially defy the prophecy."

I was dumbfounded, "The prophecy states a war. How could marrying you prevent a war from happening?"

He sighed, "The prophecy states more than just a war. It states the beginning and end of my rule of Neverland. Nearing the end of my rule, there is a certain magic wielder that intends on ripping my heart out of my body. She tricks me into her plans and I need to stop that from happening. You seem like the perfect pawn. A little stowaway who got lost in the wreckage. You have no cause, no gifts and no power... "

All of it was overwhelming. He doesn't know I'm a magic wielder. Am I the girl from the prophecy? Do I rip his heart out? I would never resort to murder. I don't think I could morally live with myself. And I especially can't marry him. He's a monster.

I had questions and lots of them, "You fall for her 'tricks'? Are you meaning to tell me the prophecy states you fall for her?"

He scoffed, "Peter Pan doesn't fall in love. Don't ever speak of that again."

I'll take that as a yes, "Let me get this straight. You want to marry me to distract yourself from falling for the girl from the prophecy."

It was bizarre how calm I was.

He seemed appalled by my deduction, "Absolutely not. I don't want to marry you. I need her to think she stands no chance against our 'love', so she doesn't even consider trying to make me fall for her tricks. My shadow and I know this plan is foolproof." The word 'love' rolled of his tongue abrasively.

I was starting to get sick of this prophecy, "What exactly does the prophecy state?"

He scoffed, "None of your business. Take my offer or not; I couldn't care less."

I groaned, "Either way, I'll still be your prisoner."

"You are a lost... girl. As much as I'd hate to say it, you are one of us. Are you trying to tell me that you would rather go back home? Trust me, you would be happy here."

Although I'm not happy at home, I'm content. I could never be happy here, can I? I most certainly do not want a romantic relationship with the monster from my nightmares. He's abusive and manipulative. But I knew for certain I didn't have much choice in the matter. It was either this or suffer for an eternity with absolutely no chance of getting off this island. I was starting to consider his proposal, "And what are the terms of this 'marriage'?"

He scoffed again, "If you're implying that there will be a relationship between us, then you are utterly wrong. Obviously, no one will find out about this agreement-"

I've lost how many times I've interrupted him, "Not even the lost boys?"

"No. If someone found out we don't feel anything for each other, then that puts my plan at risk. In addition, there would have to be a ceremony-"

"A wedding?" Would this mean I'd have to kiss him? I shuddered at the thought.

Peter was fuming, "Will you stop interrupting me? I don't want this as much as you do, so keep those plump little lips together while I finish."

I slowly nodded my head and he continued, "Yes, a wedding on the beach so the mermaids see. Apparently they are big gossipers and that will gain the attention of every magic wielder or pirate who intends on taking over Neverland. And since the Lost Boys have to believe our relationship is real, you will have to live with me. Other than that, you will live as a Lost Boy."

I was a bit on edge now, "W-what do you m-mean by live w-with you?"

"Take it or leave it. I don't care what you choose. Just understand that this is your best hope. Be grateful I'm giving you a third chance."

I watched him as he left the clearing. My mind racing as rapidly as my heart. If I wanted to last long enough for Rumplestiltkin's ticket out of here, I'd have to do what I need to. For Frankie.

Before he could leave the clearing, I spoke loud and hesitantly, although I wanted to vomit instead.

"I'll marry you."

He was facing away from me, but I knew he was pulling his signature smirk. All the implications of this agreement took a toll on me and I had to have some sort of security.

So I cleared my throat, "But, I need a week. Just a week to tell the others. I don't want them to think I did something to not get killed."

He turned around, a little confused, "Did what?"

My face reddened and I was pissed off, "I will not have the boys thinking I slept with you so I could get out of this cage."

He didn't even stutter and he lifted a brow, "Fine. One week and then the arrangements will be made."

I gave him a look and asked, "Aren't you forgetting something?"

He lifted his chin and sighed, "And what may that be?"

I looked at him as if it was obvious, "You're more willing to ask for my hand than ask for my name?" I almost seemed offended.

He walked up to me, "you're a girl, a useless one matter of fact, why would your name be any worthy to me?"

I furrowed my brows, "Because I'm apparently your 'lover'." I made sure to show my disgust at the word 'lover'.

He looked tempered, "Well, you are little, annoying and you keep pecking aimlessly at things you shouldn't... maybe I'll call you a little robin."

I groaned, "I'd rather you not."

He clapped his hands, "So it's settled, my little robin."

What was it with his degrading little names. And I thought 'Little one' was as worst as it could get.

He let me out the cage. The second my legs hit the ground, I almost fell there and then. But two bulky hands caught my waist and my cheek landed on a muscular chest. I looked up and was challenged with piecing emerald eyes. He tilted his head and one of his hands made its way to my jaw. His thumb stroking my bottom lip again. We were both reminiscing the moment we had in the shed. My vulnerability was peeking out and I couldn't allow myself to do that. Pan is my enemy and nothing more.

Therefore, I quickly dismissed our thoughts and held myself up, detaching us. I looked at him with stern eyes; an attempt to look unaffected by his gesture. In return, he gave me the same heated look. The tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife. He was radiating dominance and my defiance only set him off further, but he quickly shook it off and grabbed my wrist.

Ultimately dragging me out of the clearing and he seemed to be heading back to camp. I was stumbling everywhere while trying to keep up to his pace. After all, I hadn't been walking much in the past few days. I tumbled again and scraped my ankle, but he didn't seem to care. If anything, he seemed satisfied that some punishment was put for my lack of respect.

Thankfully, we reached The Camp and all eyes were on me. I cowered behind Peter slightly. The boys seemed to be around the fire, enjoying their supper. I first noticed Frankie's huge smile; it's nice to know someone's happy to see me. I then noticed Thomas who seemed happy at first to see me, but then held a guilty look. I guess he regrets his actions of avoiding me now.

Peter cleared his throat, "As your leader, I decided to give our little stowaway a third chance to prove herself. For those who question why, it's because I've taken pity on the poor girl and might be good bait for the war." He chuckled and the majority of the others laughed with him, "Treat her with respect or deal with me."

My face was entirely red in embarrassment at his reasonings and I wanted to punch him. How could he say something like that? I looked at the boys and they didn't seem too fazed by Peter's announcement. Apart from Adrik and his minions Dipper and Mason; they seemed to be giving me death glares and I wasn't surprised after the stunt I pulled during the hunt.

I looked at Adrik with the same amount of abhor. But my stare off was disturbed by Frankie who had moved in front of me with a look of excitement on his face, "It was really boring while you were gone."

I looked down and realised Peter had gone during the showdown. I replied to Frankie friendlily, "I bet Thomas kept you company."

He shrugged his shoulders and yawned. And I told him, "You should get some rest."

He nodded and we headed to our treehouse. I tucked him in and he was out like a light. Reaching under my bed, I took my mini pouch out and revised my notes I wrote about Neverland. Stupidly, I hadn't written anything anything on Pan's shadow. I sat down on the the woodwork floor, leaning mu back on the bed. I mean, why would I? Shadows are shadows. They shouldn't have a mind of own. I looked down at my shadow caused by the flickering candle light and lifted a hand. I shook it randomly to catch my shadow off guard, but it followed my every move. I scolded myself for actually attempting such a childish thing.

Thomas came storming in, "What did you do?" His anger was cut short when he realised I was watching my shadow with a suspicion pile of papers and pouch on my lap. "What are you doing?"

I sighed exhaustedly, "Just going over some notes. What's up with you?"

He took a seat next to me, looking over my notes. "Peter never hesitates to kill someone. Heck- he's never given someone a third chance. What makes you any different?"

I wanted to tell him the truth, but at the same time, I didn't want to put him at risk. I don't know if Thomas would get killed for knowing the truth about the "arrangement" I have with Peter since he made it clear enough to keep it a secret. I decided to keep Thomas in the dark, for now anyway. I knew this was a bad time to tell him about the engagement because he wouldn't believe that I would have feelings for that monster, just yet.

I shrugged, "I don't know." And started to clear up and hide the mess I made.

Thomas asked, "why are you lying and what's all that stuff?"

"Just things I brought from home. Anyway, I thought you'd rather not get involved in what I'm doing?"

"I trust Peter and I hate lying to him. However, if you're in trouble then I'd like to know. Or at least help, if I can."

If he still trusted Peter, even after keeping me in that cage for so long, than he wasn't worth the trouble of knowing my secret about Rumplestiltkin or even the arrangement between Peter and I.

I made my decision, "I can handle myself."

And with that, I got up. But his hand gripped mine and he stared deeply at me, "You can tell me anything Aurora. I care about you and I'm sorry for avoiding you after the hunt, but it wasn't that I was angry with you. If anything, I was angry at myself. I couldn't help you when you needed me." He gripped my hand tighter and seemed to be on the verge of tears. "I promise you a million times Aurora that I never wanted you alone in that cage, but I was too scared you would ask me for help... I couldn't chose between lying to Peter or helping you. I know its selfish and I'm so so sor-"

I soothed him, "Hey, it's not your fault. I wouldn't expect you to get into trouble for me and risk your place here when you are clearly happy here. You are not selfish for wanting a home to belong to."

I hugged him, but I felt like it was more for my sake than his. I've never seen him cry before and in a place full of boys, I could understand why he would bottle it up. I don't hug people. I've never really been comfortable with it, but deep down I craved that kind of comfort and touch. And by the looks of it, he did too.

That night we both fell asleep on his bed. I didn't think it was meant romantically, but I think we both just needed a sense of security in the presence of one another. His arm was around my waist and every intake of his breath could be felt behind my ear. It tickled. My lids fell shut and light surrounded me.

My toes were wedged between grains of sand and I could hear the waves pass by.

I looked down; my cargo trousers and oversized shirt were fresh and clean. I carried various items such as a dagger, small med kit, bow and quiver and a sword.

I looked up and saw Peter. He was wearing the similar items and he looked at me with darkened eyes.

I looked around and realised the bloodied scene.

Lost boys and other unidentifiable bodies lay dead on the sand; blood oozing out at every corner of my eye.

My eyes landed on Frankie's lifeless body and I froze in shock. I could see a few strangers in the distance, but Ian, Maison and Dipper came by my side. They were just as saddened as I. The strangers came closer and carried various weapons.

It was all too much. I couldn't handle it. I screamed of pure shock and fear. A combustion deep down in my exterior causing waves of anger, frustration and grief launched out of my body.

Huge torrents of magical, wisp-like waves of grey and blue flew out of my lips as I bellowed and screamed. My conscious state was gone and I felt psychotic.

Once I gained my bearings, I realised I pushed the bloodied bodies away from me ever so slightly. I covered my mouth in pure fear.

What did I do?

I gazed at my sides; where were the rest of the lost boy? It was then I noticed they laid unconscious behind me. Blood pouring out their ears. I looked down again and realised my clothes were stained crimson. I remembered the men in the distance and turned to face them. Only to find out they all laid dead with crimson falling out their ears. Their eyes still open, but empty.

They were all dead.

I killed them all.

Two hands wrapped around my hips and a course whisper was brought to my ear, "My little robin, look at the mess you made. Too bad you couldn't save them." He was referring to the lost boys.

I blinked. Then suddenly there were bodies of grown men and lost boys at my feet, "I didn't k-kill t-them... this is all a dream!"

I heard his cold laughter getting louder and louder. My vision was blurring.

I awoken gasping for air and sweating. Thomas immediately realised, "Shh calm down, it was only a nightmare." He began stroking my hair. "It wasn't real."

I was still pretty shaken, "But i-it was so..."

Taking my shoulders and staring at me right in the eyes, "I've got you, okay?" He was smiling at me slightly and it eased my nerves.

My breaths were steadying and I couldn't help but look at his eyes. It was brimmed navy blue with a subtle clear-sky blue when in direct light.

We were both subconsciously moving in closer to each other. I could feel his breath tingling my upper lip.

The sound of shuffling from Frankie ripped us out of our moment and it was then I realised this couldn't happen, could it? Thomas is my best friend, do I really want to start anything romantic with him? Is it wise, especially at a time like this? All of these overwhelming thoughts battled in my heat-oppressed brain and I started to feel unsteady.

Thomas seemed to notice my uncertainty and he took my hand, "There's no rush. You're my favourite person in this world and there's no need to jump into things, especially if you're living in Neverland with us."

I smiled and nodded. This was my favourite thing about Tom, he never hovered or clinged like velcro. I always loved that about him. But could I love him? I'd like to think so, I owe him that much.

But, I'm getting married in a week, I wondered what Peter might think of this. If he got angry then he wouldn't kill me because he needs me to defy the prophecy, but I can't say he wouldn't kill Thomas. I groaned, this is all too much.

Thomas and Frankie got up and changed while I looked away. Then they left me alone so I could get dressed. I guess for now this is the ritual.

I sprawled out of bed and laid on the floor. Letting my mind soak into the hard-wood floor, ripples forming in the air and my liquified thoughts drifting out the window and over the hills, drifting under the waves and getting lost in the deep, dark abyss outside of reality.

To a place where I didn't have to distance myself from a potential lover, where it wasn't modern day castaway version The Titanic, where a powerful villain tries to get the girl, but her feelings for a morally capable person gets in the way. But life isn't a cheesy romance; life is brutal and unfair. Something I've learnt at a young age.

I got dressed and briefly consider taking my breast wrap off. I don't need it anymore and I've brought a bra with me. However, I didn't like the idea of being seen like a girl amongst the boys. I hated to stand out and doing this would surely differentiate us for certain. But I kept my hair down because the bun was straining my scalp. I kept my bandages around my breasts on and went out to the small balcony of the treehouse. The view was small but you could just about see the ocean. I noticed a small black dot on the line where the sky meets the sea. I squinted my eyes and noticed a flag.

Pirates.