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Elden Ring: Miquella's Consort

(A/N: This is yaoi/gay/boy's love story, featuring the Miquella and Tarnished, in case you didn't figure. If you bitch about it, I'm coming for YOUR asshole instead.) I died, I met an Omnipotent being, and he granted me some wishes. Pretty cliche at this point, right? Can't get any originals in these times, am I right? But that's where the cliches stop. Why? Well, what do you think my wish was? To be overpowered? To have a massive, useless harem? No, god no. I hate harems, damn it! (Ahem ahem, but some worlds are exceptions.) So what was my wish? Pretty original, I wanted to be a Multiverse myself! Not as in own a Multiverse. But as in be a literal Multiverse myself! Pretty cool, right? But what kind of Multiverse did I become? Simple, I became a Parasitic Multiverse, where I would send pieces of myself to different Multiverses and copy their sources of powers and such to make myself even stronger than them! Comics like Marvel, DC, Invincible, movies like Transformers, Godzilla, Harry Potter, cartoons like Rick and Morty, TMNT, Kung Fu Panda, animes like Dragon Ball, Bleach, Naruto, and games like God of War, Assassin's Creed, Devil May Cry! I want them all, I want every power available in each and every one of them! So I sent my soul pieces to every one of them! But not as overpowered beings. Nah, that would be boring. I don't want to just copy their powers, I want to experience and venture around too! So what about this soul piece? What's it going to do, and what Multiverse will it go to? Doesn't the damn title make it obvious?! This is the tale of me, a reincarnated of no renown, upgrading to a Tarnished of no renown in the Elden Ring instead! But fuck the "in the search of the Elden Ring," I'm in the search of Miquella the femboy's bussy instead! Get some popcorn, drinks and snacks, cause it's time to hit the grind!

That_One_Dead_Ali · Derivasi dari game
Peringkat tidak cukup
52 Chs

CH 32: The Weeping Peninsula's Night's Cavalry

(A/N: Guys, so since the book cover had to be changed, choose which of these pics should be the cover from now on. Just comment +1 under whichever you like more.)

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As he killed two more on the way, he collected the two glowing items on the ground. The system was as useful as it could be, like always :"Oh, 8 Kukri and 5 Glowstones. Alright, not bad."

[Runes: 6,288 -> 6,316

8 Kukri

5 Glowstones]

He continued on, picking whatever he could and carefully platforming his way down another hole he found. And shortly after, he found himself nearing the boss room. It really was one of the early caves.

[Cave Moss x5

Silver Firefly x3]

But hearing the loud, familiar snoring, his heart dropped :"Oh, fuck my life..." Making Miquella frown :"(What? What's the matter, Alistair?)"

"Hold on for a second."

Careful in his steps, he made his way deeper before looking for the boss. Leaning against the cave entrance and looking to where the snoring was coming from, he closed his eyes and sighed :"Fuck, it's this cave..."

It was his number one most hated enemy as the boss. A sleeping Rune Bear. He finally understood why he had such a bad feeling about this place.

"(Oh, is that one of the Rune Bears you and uncle Maliketh were complaining about? It sure does look menacing.)"

"Wait till you see it in action. Oh fuck it, I should be able to kill with my current attributes. Let's hope so, at least."

Crouching, he made his way towards it slowly. But not two steps in and the damn thing got up :"Fuck!" Alistair quickly got ready and summoned his wolves. The damn thing still got the jump on him with that gay ass leap of his though.

'Oh, it doesn't do as much damage as I thought it would.' Seeing how much damage he still had, he smiled before quickly dodging. Seeing how relentless it was with spamming attacks, he remembered the good old strategy for Rune Bears. Hug its legs.

He rolled into him, his claws magically phasing through him before he swung his club. And as much as game physics applied to him, some things still reminded him that this was reality now. Like the Rune Bear freezing in place before roaring in pain when his club landed where he assumed was his family jewels.

The poor thing rolled on the ground, roaring in pain, spreading his legs to relieve some of the pain and outright ignoring his attackers. The ones who cringed at his state, even Miquella in his mind, as they all shivered.

"O-oh, I'm so sorry, dude. I didn't expect to-" He apologized, but the Rune Bear's angry glare moved to him again before it leaped at him again :"Alright, maybe not! Fuck you!"

The assault started once again. Alistair dodged the deadly claws while smacking the Rune Bear. It was a funny thing, a man attacking with wolves but with a freaking wooden club. But the damage on the Rune Bear's health bar and the stance breaks they got from the charge attacks spoke otherwise.

Getting him to stand in one place and attacking was hard, with the wolves taking a few hits and he even needed to use two flasks. But in the end, they prevailed with nervous pants and the Spelldrake Talisman in Alistair's hand :"Alright, phew, that was a rollercoaster of a battle."

[Spelldrake Talisman: Boosts magical damage negation by 13%]

He equipped his new talisman alongside his Radagon's Soreseal talisman. As the wolves disappeared after a few praises, the Tarnished sighed in relief :"Now do you get why we hate these bastards so much? And this is an easy one. The stronger ones are a fucking nightmare."

"(Yes, that truly looked troublesome. We should be careful to avoid the Rune Bears from now on then. Alright, pick up those items in the Rune Bear's sleeping spot and let's go back.)"

"Yeah, sure. God, I fucking hate Rune Bears and they remind me why each time." He grumbled as he picked up the items from the corpses on the ground :"Oh, at least the items aren't bad. Alright, let's go back to uncle Maliketh."

[Smoldering Butterflies x5

Trina's Lily x1]

"(Oh, wait! Don't forget about the chest in the entrance of the cave.)"

"Ooh, you're right! I totally forgot about that one. Alright, let's take that too. Along with this Rune Bear's corpse, I guess. Hope it at least tastes good. Or at least it's edible."

Fast traveling to the Site of Grace at the entrance of the cave, he went and opened the chest. After picking up what's inside, along with the cave moss next to it, his eyes widened in delight.

[Pickled Turtle Neck x3

Cave Moss x1]

"Oh, now this is what I'm talking about! Who would have thought we would find Pickled Turtle Neck here! Alright, this cave is redeemed just a bit."

"(Hm? Are they useful?)"

"They boost the recovery speed of stamina, so yes, they are extremely good. Anyway, let's go back now."

With a gold flash, he disappeared from the cave and appeared at the Bridge of Sacrifice Site of Grace, where Maliketh was waiting patiently. He smiled upon seeing the Tarnished :"Oh, you're back. That was quicker than I thought."

"I told you it would be quick." Alistair shrugged as he summoned Miquella :"It barely took a few minutes to reach the boss chamber."

"So how did it go?"

"We obviously succeeded, but... the boss was a goddamn Rune Bear."

"Oh." Maliketh growled :"One of those bastards again? God, I hate them. You alright?"

"Yeah, I'm good, thanks. I did take a few hits from the damn thing, but the Flasks of Crimson Tears did their magic. So I'm spotless."

"Oh, thank goodness you're not injured then. Do you want to take a rest before we set off?"

"Nah, it's alright. I was just surprised. The fight didn't take long anyway. So we can just go now."

"What about you, Miquella?"

Miquella shook his head with a smile :"I just sat back in Alistair's mind and watched the battle. I didn't do anything to be tired."

"Alright then, let's continue our journey." Maliketh smiled before walking ahead of them. The two looked at each other before chuckling. He really did seem to be enjoying the journey. Was it due to just venturing around, or because it distracted him from his hunger, or because he enjoyed his time together with them, they didn't know. But they were just glad that he was having a fun time.

-

[Ash of War: Mighty Shot]

As the journey continued, they finally came across a new Site of Grace. This time a lot more peaceful than their journey through Limgrave. But just as Alistair activated it, Maliketh alerted them :"Guys, I think we have company."

When they looked, they saw a Night's Cavalry riding his horse towards them. Alistair just remembered the time and the place they were at :'Right, I forgot about the Night's Cavalry in this location. I need to be careful from now on. Don't want to wake up to a Night's Cavalry or a goddamn Deathbird of all things in the middle of the night.'

Miquella looked carefully :"That's... a Night's Cavalry, if I remember correctly. They are led by Morgott and roam the Lands Between to deliver death to great warriors, knights, and champions. I didn't expect to see one here. But he doesn't seem to be as strong as the other Night's Cavalry from back then."

"Hey, kid, want to take him on?" Maliketh grinned at Alistair :"I'd say you two are about the same level of strength. How about you test yourself against a real warrior for once instead of against animals or weak soldiers? You wanna try?"

Alistair grinned back, teeth appearing as his gaze turned sharp :"You read my damn mind, unc. You two stay back. I'll take him on."

Taking out his battle axe, he walked towards the approaching Night's Cavalry. They stopped for a moment when they could see each other clearly, their gazes doing the talking instead of words. And as if coming to an agreement, they both got ready for combat.

"Neigh!" His horse reared up before galloping towards Alistair. The Night's Cavalry swung the flail with three heads he carried, giving it momentum before he attacked Alistair. But the Tarnished rolled to the side before swinging his own weapon, causing the horse to yell in pain.

Under its master's control, it moved to the side sharply to attack him. But after another roll, several more axe strikes hit it and the Night's Cavalry. The Cavalry swung his flail, but Alistair had locked in. He wasn't going to get embarrassed in front of his femboy of all people. No, sir, that ain't happening in a million years.

The Cavalry's health bar dropped rapidly. Even though the damage of the attacks wasn't significant, he made up for it with quick attacks. Attack after attack, quick dodge one after another, and the Night's Cavalry's horse finally lost all HP. Causing the rider to fall down when it reared with a pained yell.

As he groaned on the ground, Alistair landed a critical hit, lowering his HP by a large margin before he got up. Blood spilling from the spaces between his armor. But he didn't surrender or back out. He two handed his flail before he swung it at the slippery Tarnished again and again, but Alistair dodged them all before taking advantage of the punish windows.

In the end, after a few more hits, the Night's Cavalry finally fell. Dissipating into dust when his body hit the floor and Alistair found his Nightrider Flail in his inventory after receiving a notification.

'So I don't get his armor, huh? How unfortunate. It's one of the best armors too.'

[Runes: 12,777]

"Good job, kid! I liked that fight!" Maliketh gently pushed him from the side with a grin :"You were pretty light on your feet as you attacked at every chance you got. Good. Seems like my teachings aren't going to waste."

"Marvelously fought, my consort." Miquella's gentle voice soothed him as he appeared with a smile :"Just what I had expected from my dear consort. Your combat prowess has increased significantly from empowering yourself with runes and by receiving combat training from uncle Maliketh."

"Hahaha thanks." He smiled :"Glad I didn't embarrass myself. Anyway, now that that's finished, there should be a merchant nearby. Where is he... oh, there he is! Come on, let's go buy one of the talismans I told you about."

Seeing the group approaching, the masked merchant stopped playing his music :"Buying or selling?"

"Buying. What do you have in stock?"

After checking everything he had for sale, Alistair bought anything he needed. He had enough runes to enjoy a bit of luxury, after all.

[Smithing Stones [1] x3 (200)

Smithing Stones [2] x1 (400)

Cracked Pot x1 (600)

Stonesword Key x1 (2,000)

Crimson Amber Medallion (1,500): Raises maximum HP by 6%.]

[Runes: 12,777 -> 7,677]

He contemplated buying the Bastard Sword he had, but considering it was 3,000 runes and he wanted to save some just in case, he decided against it. Better safe than sorry when it came to money.

"2,000 runes for a single Stonesword Key! That's daylight robbery!" Miquella frowned while being covered from the rain by the Site of Grace :"And he wanted to sell that insignificant sword for 3,000 runes!

Even a Night's Cavalry only had 3,400 runes with him! The most ridiculous thing is how he wanted to sell that armor! Piece by piece! Each one was so expensive too! How I wanted to just..."

Seeing him prepare the food angrily, Alistair chuckled in amusement :"Calm down, Miquella. You might get injured if you're not careful while cooking. And besides, the prices might seem like too much right now, but believe me, we're going to need only pocket money to buy everything merchants have for sale."

Miquella frowned :"What? What does that mean?"

Alistair chuckled, but his eyes looked dead :"Oh, you'll know in the future, when leveling up is gonna cost a shit ton of runes…"