Pursuit of the right path.

March 2011

Days after the Tohuko devastating earthquake, the worldwide news speaks about thousands of deaths injured and missing people,  the global organizations are offering help, and countries already sent financial and medical aid to Japan, people from all over the world shares their thoughts about it on Facebook, Twitter and even  on the new release Instagram.

Anime and manga  fans can't skip a single second of the news, watching their dream country suffering, is a heartache itself, but what can they do to help except watching Naruto shippuden's eighth season,

Or one piece's fish man island Arc.

In the middle of the world 's non-stop drama, people are still living their lives, adults going to work to be able to put food on the table, university students trying not to fail any subjects, football champions league is preparing for the quarter finals same as football fans.

And high schools seniors are preparing for their final exams.

Graduating  high school seems the hardest thing and biggest to achieve until the university pressure pops in.

In one of the ordinary high schools of the USA, where life seems peaceful more than usual, all the students gathered in the stadium stands to support their football team for the final game.

the Brian's high school football team is doing great, one loss, nine wins and two draws this season.

the team never was this strong before, they actually never won the cup, but Raiden Nishimura made this dream almost realistic , he joined the team in the beginning of this season after moving to the USA with his father, and everything got in the right order to the team ever  since.

A skinny tall handsome Asian , with big ambitions and skills, playing with one of  the professional football clubs in the country is his main goal and biggest dream,

His team mates call him the superstar, the coach noticed his leadership skills and rapid adaptation  since day one، so he made him captain right after his first official game, looks kind of a risky decision but  he believed in his dexterity and the young Japanese never disappointed him , each one in the team listens to his instructions and follows them.

Playing with both feet right and left is Raiden's strength; never misses a goal is what makes him the center of attention of all talent seekers.

Everyone believes that he is the next Cristiano Ronaldo.

speed and dangerous kicks, and the ability of leading, made Raiden the player he is today.

the final game is about to start, a talent seeker of the professional state club is taking a seat in the front to observe the Japanese very well, and if he gets lucky , he will sign a contract in weeks.

In the locker room the young players finished getting ready, the coach is giving his usual final advice before every game :

"play clean"

The team players head to the playground, Raiden  is the last one in the line, the coach walks next to him and whispers few words :

" the talent seeker is sitting in the front, winning the cup today will make your chances bigger" he says and passes him.

Those words made the young football player more anxious.

He keeps thinking about what happened in his country even though that his cousins and old friends live far from the incident but those who died are his people.

Once in the playground, the teams salute the national anthem, take the team pictures, the two captains meet to exchange club flags and to choose which side of the playground, Raiden goes for obverse while the other captain chooses the back, the arbiter throws the coin in the air and let it fall in front of them, giving Raiden the right to choose.

and right after taking the picture with the arbiters the other captain shakes the asian's  hand coldly and leaves.

Such behavior disturbs Raiden usually, he has been through a lot of racist acts, but today he must hold himself, if he wants to make it to the professional clubs his anger issues need to be controlled, he can't curse, he can't fight, and for sure can't claim the arbiters decisions.

The Brian's high-school team reunite for a final word :

"Why are we playing today! " Raiden asks.

"we playing to win" his team mates in one voice.

"why!"

"to win" they repeat.

"I can't hear you"

"to win" very loud.

Doing this before each game is like a prayer that pushes them to give their very best.

The game starts, both teams are strong , they both possess the ball equally for fifteen minutes , until  the Brian's Japanese striker receives the ball from the center middle and heads with a great speed to the goal and... He scores.

GOAL!

His team mates runs to hug him

the coach smiles and claps

the audience go crazy over it

but it's not the case for the opponent team.

While they celebrate, the others gather

"I can't take it anymore, we going for plan B" the captain says.

"are you sure?, we can win without that" the center back affirms.

"if you are a coward, Tyler can do it" the captain angrily answers.

But Tyler the left back also gives the scared face which makes the captain angrier.

"what do you want me to do , to do it myself!" he furiously yells at them.

"okay okay, I will do it, but you have to lead him to me" Tyler says.

"easy!" the captain answers.

They all take their spots, and right after that the  arbiter whistles, the captain of the opponent team makes an intentional mistake that makes Raiden capture the ball easily,

The striker runs for a second goal,

Tyler left back runs to him after receiving the head sign from his captain but not to take the ball, he on purpose hits Raiden's right knee hardly...

He falls in pain, the arbiter whistles and gives a red card immediately to Tyler who leaves the playground without regret,

Brian's team  starts a fight with the other team under the audience's booings.

The arbiter waves to the medical team who come running to the injured player .

He examinates the injured knee, and gives the arbiter the word to take the player out.

The team superstar under shock insists on staying and tries to stand but  the pain is stronger than he thinks. He finally gives up and allows the medical group to take him after giving the captain badge to one of his team mates.

Out of the playground the coach whispers few words to the Boy "I'll talk to the talent seeker don't worry"

Which calms Raiden who's struggling not to cry.

The medical team head to the hospital in an ambulance.

Worried Raiden asks with a shaking voice "when I'm capable of playing again?"

But the doctor doesn't give a clear answer "let us scan the knee first".

                                       ***

March 2011

Adeline Stewart, a sixteen year old teenager is sitting on the waiting room for more than half an hour now waiting for her turn to come, hiding her face With a black mask and glaces ashamed of being a teenager with issues in a world full of judgements.

It's her fifth session, and she is starting to trust Dr Boyle one of the best psychologists in the city, she is even thinking about to reveal some secrets like the cuts she made in her arms every time she felt guilty about something, or the sadness that hits her randomly without an obvious reason forcing her to repeat non-stop one of the alphabet letters until she feels calmed down, or even how she wants to end her life in a painful way because she thinks she deserves pain and sadness, crying herself to sleep each night, thinking repeatedly about the times she said stupid things or made stupid mistakes.

She is pretty convinced that the way she thinks is the normal way, and other people are like her,  faking their happiness in public.

Looking good is her daily goal, no one should notice her mesury neither feel pity for her, she prefer being hated and misunderstood by the people surrounding her and not see the compassion in their eyes, not even her own parents.

Their divorce played a huge role in her life, and maybe the main reason for every negative thought she ever had.

But she knows that her parents loves her no matter what.

Adeline's turn arrives, she heads to the doctor office, knocks and gets in, the doctor smiles at her which comforts the young girl.

Used to Dr Boyle's sessions , Adeline takes a seat in the couch in front of the psychologist chair.

Typical questions comes first before starting the conversation that stopped the last week.

"where do you see yourself in five years" the doctor asks.

Adeline takes few seconds before giving her answer, she knows she can't say " in a grave" because she will be considered suicidal, and they probably will lock her in some asylum.

So she says " in college maybe"

"so you are thinking about having a high studies diploma, which is good" the therapist says.

" how's your sleep lately" she adds.

"I'm still having the same nightmares" the girl answers.

"you at the core, the divorce day?" she questiones.

"yes"

"do you want them back together?"

"no, my mom is happier this way and I'm happy for her"

"do you hate your father for making her miserable?"

"I used to, but not anymore"

"what changed your mind?"

"he is sick"

"you feel pity for him?"

"yes"

"when was the last time you spoke to him?"

"yesterday, on the phone and I'm planning to visit him today at the hospital"

"good, do you think you are able to tell him how do you truly feel about him"

"I don't know, it depends"

"on what?"

"if I'm in the mood to do it"

"how's that?"

"sometimes I just don't feel that I want to bring something from the past to the table"

"what if it is the only thing that will make your nightmares disappear?"

"I don't know maybe"

"yes or no?"

"yes, but what if my father will get mad about it?"

"I want you to put yourself first in this situation"

"I will feel guilty then for bothering him"

"what if he won't get mad about it?"

"there is no way for that to happen"

"does his anger issues ever affected your decisions?"

"most of the time"

"are you satisfied about it?"

"no"

"I'll tell you this, your father may not abused you physically but emotionally he did"

"I don't know"

"deep down you do"

Adeline feels her body getting warmer.

"now let me ask you again, do you hate him and give me a direct answer?"

Adeline thinks a little, does telling the truth will make her feel guilty...

"yes"

And yes she feels guilty for feeling this way, but it's stronger than her.

Suddenly Adeline's phone rings.

The session gets interrupted.

"it's my mom" Adeline stares at the phone and then at the doctor waiting for an approval to take the call.

"does she know you are here?" the doctor asks.

"yes" the girl answers.

Meanwhile the phone stops ringing.

"call her back when we are done. I'm pretty sure she is calling to check on you"

Adeline doesn't feel good about the call, her mom never interrupted their talking before.

Knock knock.

Dr Boyle's assistant gets in in a hurry "your mother just called, she asked you to come to the hospital where your father is"

"why what happened?"

"she asked you to hurry up"

Adeline immediately stands, takes her back bag and heads to the door running.

The doctor follows her "wait let me drive you"

But the teenager refuses "No, it's okay I'm taking the bus"

The doctor insists, but the girl seems convinced of her decision, she even speeds leting the doctor way behind.

Out of the building she runs to the bus station, letting her dark thoughts dominate her mind.

GUILTY.

That's what she feels at the moment, she even hates herself for telling the truth to the doctor earlier.

Few minutes of waiting and the bus arrives, she takes a seat in the back and makes no move the whole way not a single blink.

Only one line is repeating in her head

" he is going to die because of me"

Thinking because she said she hates how he made her feel is the reason his health is getting worse.

ILLOGICAL.

But not to the fragile teenager.