Not even one day has passed since the beginning of the new year and the thoughts about me wanting to die have started again, sole thanks to my sister though. I don't even feel like coming home these days, or should I say 'house'?
Why didn't I really die off somewhere in the road. I got saved from one accident today, to be specific. Just when I had reached home and opened the door, I saw the face which I didn't wanted to see- the face of my sister's ex-boyfriend who had now become her 'current boyfriend' though.
Sometimes I think that I should ask for 'cheating tips' from him, given how much of a big player he is. He left my sister for another girl, but then he once again came back to her and my sister forgave him- man, she deserves better! She doesn't deserves a jerk like him!
But who will make her understand this? I've stopped to put any sort of efforts to be honest. Since class 9, I tried hard upto class 10, but the only conclusion which came was the fight between us sisters with both of us sleeping at night while crying.
Here I am, sitting inside this room, locking myself in, since they have locked the room inside which they are sitting. I don't even feel like thinking anything these days. I haven't eaten my tiffin yet and I lied to my friends that I had brought no tiffin. It's just that I didn't have an appetite- I don't have one now though, but I gotta stuff all of it inside my mouth.
I am feeling lonely once again... when the hell will I die God? When will that day actually come?