Chapter 11

***

- ...iem! - Oh, it's Bobby now. Step and I'm back at Bobby's.

- I have two pieces of news, one, you can even be heard in the Himalayas, and two, Dean's only going to have a man standing for a month now.

- What did you say? - He asked in horror.

- I say, even being on Everest I heard you, so if you need help, call me. That's it, I'm flying, I have things to do. - And turned invisible.

- As in men? What the fuck? He was kidding, right? He was kidding, wasn't he? - Oh that horror in his eyes, and don't call me names.

- No joke," Bobby said laughing in his voice. "You shouldn't have used the word asshole in your prayer.

- I'll kill that bastard if I get my hands on him.

That's it, I'm out of here.

I've done a nasty thing and my heart is glad. Where do I go next?

Well, it's time to visit my aunt, because I look after her sometimes. But not often.

She's fine, no demons around, nothing supernatural going on in town, fine. Got married, had a baby, everything's normal.

And it was time for me to check out another way to kill myself. Visited my grave and picked up the remains. Moved to the farm, time for an experiment. I took one of the bones and threw it into the fire, expecting unpleasant sensations, but no, all is quiet calm.

No itching anywhere, nothing hurts.

Destroyed the rest, even I am almost a zero in the local magic know a couple of ways to cause problems having such a trump card in hand.

I've gone to the Pacific for the First Blade, so it's useless without the mark, but I'll keep it.

Time to raise the stakes, find the rest of the Princes of Hell. And Crowley will help me, he's in charge of deals in hell and I have something to offer him.

Finding Fergus McCloud's bones was no problem. Now I need the king of deals himself.

And so it's night, crossroads, and I'm waiting for the girl with the red eyes.

- Hey handsome, you paged? - Asked me a spectacular brunette, sexy voice.

- Hi, I have a case, but not for you, rush to get your main.

- What the fuck are you, you piece of meat? I'm gonna tear you apart. - she's got a lot of nerve. Demon, after all.

- Get behind Crowley, quick," I said. Shoo and no, good.

I didn't have to wait long, about five minutes, and I had the head businessman in hell in front of me.

- Let's get down to business, kid, my time is valuable. - Maybe I really did take my time, hmm, whatever.

- Easy, I got your bones Fergus McCloud, if you burn them you'll die. I hope that's good enough for you? - I reported back cheerfully.

- Hmm, first of all, the bones are a myth. The second," and he poked me with his telekinesis, or rather he tried.

- It didn't work, did it? - First," I took the bone from his hand and set it on fire, "don't be a myth, your hand's gonna burn like a charm. "Number two. - And he was blown off the road like a feather by my telekinesis, only the bushes were crackling.

Let's wait.

Oh, you're back. We can talk business.

- What's the deal with the bones these days?

- It's very simple, I give them for a couple of not too burdensome services, what do you think?

- It's not very fair, I don't like it.

- I think it's just the opposite, I have something that's "vital" to you, and you're just squealing with joy that you can buy it from me. Or something in the world has changed and I'm wrong? - It wouldn't hurt to be a little more specific, you know.

- So, how can I help you? - That's the question I was waiting for.

- I need the reaper's sickle and the locations of all the Princes of Hell, that's it for now. - I'm waiting for a reaction.

- That's all for now. You're out of your mind. - Why are you yelling like that? If you want to die, why me?

- The demon says there's nothing to kill him for. That's funny. Your word, mister, probably soon to be former Deal King. - a very subtle hint.

- It will take time. - and he's gone.

And I had a brilliantly stupid idea.

I went to the gates of hell. I got past the border of a truly gigantic pentagram without any problems, so I needed to check something out, and if I could, I could surprise the representatives of the dark side of the force.

Anything could happen, and I might not make it here in time.

It's time to go hunting for birds again, soon I'm going to devour all the Princes of Hell, and I don't want my soul to go completely dark.

And I decided to start with Metatron, he's not a very strong angel, but I'm more interested in his knowledge, he's a scribe of God after all.

There aren't many Indian reservations left, so I found Metatron pretty quickly. I went in as a simple man, and the place was filled with all kinds of books, in every possible language. That much knowledge could be dangerous for me.

- Who are you? - asked a small, unkempt man with a hustler on his head, pointing a shotgun at me.

I didn't waste time talking, but attacked straight away. I could see that Metatron was really just a clerk, not a warrior. A normal angel would have been a pain in the ass to take him alive, but Metatron didn't even have time to shoot.

An instant movement, a blow to the throat with the angel's blade, and the scribe's grace poured into the vessel he was holding.

- This day has come, the angels have come for my knowledge. - The panic-stricken, almost normal-looking, homeless-looking man shouted. - But understand, it's too dangerous. - Hmm, he's probably right. To absorb such knowledge is dangerous not only because of the quantity but also because of the content.

- I'm no angel. - I looked at him with my peculiar eyes," And you're right, your knowledge is dangerous, but not all of it. I'll give you back the grace for a few answers, and you can go on your way, yes? - And he nodded happily.

And then the interrogation began.

The test of closing the gates of hell, the same.

He didn't know how to destroy the first blade, unless he knew how to take it to God.

Where the Demon Tablet is, he doesn't know. The Angel Tablet was last seen at Lucifer's.

I asked him if he knew what kind of creature I was now, and I described the process of my changes and some of my abilities to him. Judging by his fucked up look he didn't know.

- It can't be, because it can't be. - A very logical answer.

My last question was about the reborns.

- Of course there are, not often, but people remember their past lives. There's nothing unusual here. It's not possible to come from a parallel world or another universe. - and what to say to him...

- All right then, time to say goodbye. - I spoke, stabbing him with my blade and trapping the creature.

What did he expect after questions like that. He wasn't the first angel I'd killed, and he wouldn't be the last.

Everything I got from Metatron I left on my farm. I'll wait to absorb it until I have better days.