Lawn Swing

I had no other choice than to flag a rikshaw to get home. I had never ever been in a rikshaw, and I thought I would never have to. Well, life definitely takes a turn. This horrific episode gave me a lot of new experiences that I did not like in the least and I would rather they not happened at all. I took the first one without needing to bargain, I never bargained. Bargaining made me supremely uncomfortable and I wondered how everyone else could stomach it. 

As the driver started the rickshaw and swerved into a main road, cool gusts of wind soothed me to my nerves and I pulled in a long breath. I thought I was going insane, because oddly enough, I didn't feel like crying. Instead laughter seemed to be bubbling at the back of my throat, itching to burst out. Shaking my head, I tried to think straight,  trying to figure out if I preferred solitude or a scene with my father as soon as I got home. But all that my brain wanted to do was laugh like crazy at the whole bizarre situation. 

With years of listening to news headlines about daily crimes unfolding on the streets of Karachi and expressing not more than disappointment at our poor circumstances, I had never imagined and considered the fact that literally anyone could be a victim. Belonging to a rich household certainly didn't mean we're somehow exempted from such misfortunes. Everyone is equally susceptible to fall prey unless of course our government decided to take some action. Until then, prayers were the only thing that could save us.

Although, I thought as I swallowed down my lingering fear and dread, I had to admit, in my case things had turned out miraculously better than expected. 

Gazing out as trees, cluttered buildings and crowded pavements blurred past, I sighed when my mind unconsciously leaned towards solitude and impatiently waited to get back home. 

---

Telling the gape-mouthed guard at the main gate to pay the fare, I marched into the house and did not stop until I was through the driveway, past the lounge where Bisma and Father jumped to their feet upon my sight and up the stairs, until I had locked myself in my room. 

Inhaling in and exhaling out, I tried to calm the erratic beating of my heart and threw myself on the bed. Closing my eyes, I shut my mind off all kinds of thoughts, intending to take a quick nap after which I decided that I'd go to the university campus to get my possessions and my car.

A light knock on the door sounded amidst the quiet of my room. "Mashal?" It was Bisma.

I sighed and responded from the bed. "Not now, please. I don't want to talk, I just want to sleep. I'm tired." 

"Okay." She said and I could sense her nodding. "Later?"

"Later." I mumbled as my eyes drooped. 

And in a moment I was asleep.

---

My life had taken a nightmarish route, leaving me blindfolded on the path to find my way out. I missed five days of the semester, missed the viva and had no hopes of sitting in the exam either. I wondered if they'd ask for a kidnap certificate to validate the situation like they ask for the death one to ensure if the pupil is lying. But I doubted it'd come to that at all, since judging by their previous record and strict policies they don't give a shit should a student collide into a nervous breakdown or commit suicide due to severe pressure of missing an exam. 

But I knew panic would do me no good, so I needed to relax and think with a mind that was not infested by recurring thoughts of the entire episode of abduction and its repercussions, if I cared about my career enough.

Taking a last look at myself in the mirror - I had tied my hair in a ponytail and had applied only the slightest shades of makeup, worn a loose fitting sweatshirt with jeans - I exited the washroom. But just as I came down to the lounge, I saw Ramsha coming in.

She practically threw herself on me, pulling me into a bone crushing embrace.

"Oh, thank God. I thought I'd never see you again." She muttered into my shoulder. 

I could only smile wearily.

"Are you alright though?" Pulling back, she asked, her face a mask of concern.

"Hm." I nodded. 

"Where were you headed?"

I lifted my shoulders in a shrug. "University. To get my things, my car."

"Oh, don't worry, they're with me. Dilawar found your stuff in the parking and let us know, cz like the news had already spread by then. The car's there but I took your phone and books and everything else." Seeing my eyebrows bunched together, she explained. 

Stuck between relief and horror, I voiced the question. "Everybody knows? How?"

She pressed her tongue between her teeth and lifted her shoulders to her ears, before replying in a timid voice, "I'm sorry. I was just so overwhelmed, I didn't know what to do. I might have shared it with Bilal and the others, I'm so sorry. Also speaking of Bilal, he wants to talk to you. I told him you're back, and before you ask who told me, well, Bisma did. I asked her to let me know."

I nodded slightly as the world around me gave a quick spin. "Do you think we could sit and talk?"

"Sure. Did you eat anything though since you came?"

"No."

"I knew it." She flared her nostrils as an act of annoyance and held up her right hand with a shopping bag. "I brought food."

An instinctive grin split my mouth in two. "Come on." 

Back in my room, she opened a box and turned it towards me, ordering me to start eating, then from the jug on the side table poured me a glass of water. I ate in silence and once I had deposited in my stomach enough slices of pizza, I leaned back against the headrest of the bed and smiled at her as she packed the things back into the shopping bag and kept it aside on the floor. I liked being spoon fed and pampered, it made me feel like I was important, like somebody cared enough. 

"Do you think they'll consider my situation?" I asked when she had settled down and met my gaze. 

"They have to." She pressed. "It's not like their students are kidnapped every other day, and who gives getting kidnapped as a false excuse." 

"Exactly. I can only pray." I said with a dejected droop of my shoulders, looking down at my lap, wringing my fingers. "I don't want to give the exam tomorrow and fail. They have to give as many days as I missed."

"Hey," Ramsha scooted closer and gripped my shoulders. "Cheer up, Mashal. They will. They definitely will. You always have the right to sue them anyway. Let's go out, have fun. Yeah?"

I averted my gaze and looked out the glass wall, at the trees that stood tall, and swallowed the oncoming gush of tears. Life wouldn't be the same anymore.

"Mashal?"

"Yeah." Turning my head to look back at her I nodded. "Let's have fun." 

---

Ramsha called everyone and planned an outing to an escape room. I didn't have the heart to tell her that when she said let's have fun, I'd thought she meant the two of us. I didn't really want to be in a crowd where I'd inevitably be gawked at and probed with inappropriate questions but on the other hand, I hoped the trip would distract me. The twenty of us were divided into two groups and sent to different rooms to solve different mysteries. Mine was supposed to look for an invention of a mad scientist that was apparently going to get us out of the room with the help of some clues provided to us. It was a fun activity, and for the hour we stayed, there trying to decipher the complicated clues, my mind strayed from the complexities of my own life. Surprisingly, no one asked me anything or looked at me funny but it seemed as if they were all trying very hard to not do that and were physically restraining themselves, judging by the way they kept giving me sympathetic smiles and tiptoed around me. I suspected Ramsha had given them strict instructions on how to behave without me noticing.

Although, I did see Bilal eying me from the corner of his eyes, trying to be subtle but failing spectacularly. I almost flicked him upside the head, but I supposed I should give him credit for not doing it outright.

Later that night, I somehow ended up being paired with him to drop me off at home. As I stood outside the main gate, worn out and rather fuzzy, he stepped out of the car and approached me awkwardly. With some hesitation, as if deciding whether he was allowed, he gave me a warm hug, not that kind of hug that friends give you, but different, something almost special. I smiled at him and he grinned back. 

Ramsha had promised that she'd fetch my car from uni and come pick me up the next day to take me to the college, early in the morning before everyone was due to sit for the exam, and return all my things from where she'd kept them in her dorm room.

I waved at Bilal as he reversed the car and, flashing me a happy smile, drove out of sight. With a sigh, I walked into the house. I was past the driveway when I heard Bisma from somewhere around me and gave a start. She had scared the living daylights out of me.

"Are you mad at me, Mashal?" 

I turned and looked around in the dark lawn. 

"I'm here." Following her voice, my eyes found her petite figure on the swing in the middle of the front yard. Inhaling the crisp night breeze, I started towards her.

"No, I'm not mad at you."

"Then how come, for the first time, you preferred their company over mine." She complained bitterly. I thought she was crying.

"I just needed a distraction." 

"Well, I could have-"

"From home. From everyone and everything here. Including you. Because you were here, you let father stall, you let him play with time as if saving me wasn't his priority."

To my surprise, she gasped. "It's not like that, Mashal. He was worried sick, you should have seen him."

I clenched my jaw, flicked my gaze from her to the surroundings and then back. "Worried for his money, not for me. He was trying to save his money, not me." 

Her fingers curled around my wrist and she urged me to sit beside her on the swing. She was a year younger than me, but sometimes I thought she was the wiser one. "You're taking it the wrong way. I don't know who told you to think that way, but this is wrong. Everyone would want to save their money if they're on the brink of losing the entire half of their fortune, Mashal. He spent his entire life earning it, and all this, he did this for us." 

"But when it came to choosing between me and the wealth, he shouldn't have wasted a second in trying to think. What if they'd hurt me? I still can't believe they didn't."

Bisma was quiet for a moment, a strange look crossed her face, and I got the impression that she was hiding something. "He knew they wouldn't. "

"How?" I demanded haughtily. "How was he so freaking sure they wouldn't?"

"Because," she sighed, shook her head and continued. "Because he knew precisely who kidnapped you."

My eyebrows bunched together. I remembered the guy mentioning Father did something nasty to his family and told me to ask Father if I wanted to know. What if he was telling the truth, what if Father really did something wrong to them? "What? Who was he?"

She peered at me with an apologetic and a pained look in her eyes. "Adil." Her voice came out low, low enough that I thought I heard the name wrong. I asked her to come again. 

"Adil, Mashal. Our Adil. Uncle Haneef's son. Adil who used to step on your shoes all the time."