Shield from a Harsh Reality

I made it back to the servants' quarters with just enough time to change into my uniform before reporting for work, but that was OK. I didn't need more time than that because 1 had already coerced me into having breakfast with him earlier. I rounded the corner of the corridor leading to my room, and several meters before I got there, I saw 19 in front of my door. She didn't wait until I had walked down the hallway – which was where I was headed for, in any case – but instead ran up to me as soon as she spotted me. 

"I'm so glad you're all right," she said, her voice cracking. She hugged me tight. "I've been sick with worry."

'I'm fine,' I tried to reassure her as I hugged her back, feeling tears begin to sting my eyes at her display of emotion. That was the first time I saw her lose her composure, the first time she openly cried in front of me. I could picture her after the puppet show, going around the town square repeatedly when she couldn't find me. That must have been nerve wracking for her.

"If I hadn't come across His Grace, I don't know what I would have done," she revealed, swiping at her tears hastily.

'Caio?' I asked with a bewildered expression. I hadn't met him since he sent me off yesterday morning, but he must have already heard what happened. Given how fast news spread in the imperial palace, it was impossible that he wouldn't know about it. But I was puzzled what part he had played in my rescue since I was only able to contact 1 at the time.

"Oh, you should have witnessed it," 19 said, her forlorn vibe completely changing to her usual animated personality. "When I told him I couldn't find you, he ran out of here like all the demons in hell were after him." Her eyes took on a dreamy, faraway look, like a fan who got star struck by their idol. "Trust me, I've never seen anything like that before." 

'Really?' My heart broke for him. He must have imagined the worst scenarios while trying to find me – scenarios like the one he had rescued me from when he first met. And curiously enough, that was exactly the situation I was in yesterday.

19 nodded emphatically. "I heard he captured the two men who assaulted you."

I went still, suddenly finding it quite difficult to breathe properly. I recalled the terror of being trapped in the side alley, every minute like its own eternity, thinking I may not be able to get out of there alive.

"Don't worry," 19 continued, taking me by the shoulders in an attempt to bring me back to the present. "They've been severely punished for what they did." Then she gasped, as though she just remembered something important. "Which reminds me – we have to finish our chores earlier today."

'What for?' We won't have a day off again until next week, so I couldn't think of anything important we needed to do outside of our usual tasks.

"To watch their execution," she answered, her eyes burning bright.

'Execution?' I felt faint, I had never uttered that word in reference to something actually related to me. Before Luxentfort, I had only ever witnessed executions in the historical dramas I loved to watch. I had never imagined I would encounter it for real. 'What do you mean?'

"The emperor has ordered your assailants to be executed later this afternoon."

For the rest of the day I went about my chores on autopilot, subconsciously wishing for the hours to stretch longer so I wouldn't have to face the reality that I was the reason that two men were about to die. But no matter how much I prolonged the inevitable while doing the laundry and polishing the windows, I had eventually finished all of my assigned chores and afternoon came a lot sooner than I wanted.

Hearing about the execution from 19 was one thing, but actually going to the prison courtyard to witness it was on a totally different level of being surreal. And I had no idea it was going to be a public execution. I looked around in a daze at the crowd that had gathered, talking loudly at the same time and constantly moving about, trying to find a good spot to watch the beheading that was going to take place.

A wooden scaffold served as the impromptu stage of the guillotine, its heavy metal blade casting a lethal shine against the afternoon sunlight. When the prison magistrate walked up the few makeshift steps to the scaffold, all the talking hushed and the courtyard was so silent it was almost as if it was suddenly abandoned. He called for the guards to bring the prisoners, his voice clear and resonating across the courtyard. When the two men finally appeared, they were so bloodied and obviously injured that they had to be dragged to the scaffold because they couldn't walk on their own.

They were about to die, they were really about to die because of me. My breath caught in my throat at the notion, and I felt light headed. I was debating on asking 1 to put a stop on the execution and just show them mercy. But then I thought back to how it was for me yesterday at the side alley when they were about to violate me. They didn't show any trace of mercy as I struggled and cried. And if 1 hadn't arrived when he did, they would have continued on without any regard, quite possibly leaving me to die after the assault.

My eyes began to pool with conflicting tears and my breath came in short bursts. When the burly man was led to the guillotine, I was having so much difficulty breathing it was like being underwater. The prison magistrate gave the order to release the blade and I closed my eyes tight. Suddenly, someone pulled towards him and I opened my eyes, startled to see Caio in front of me. He was so tall that he completely blocked my view of the scaffold.

"You shouldn't have to see this," he said. He covered my ears with his hands, making sure I barely heard the sound of the metal blade dropping – twice. And he held me in that position until the scaffold was cleared and the onlookers had gradually scattered about. When it was just the two of us in the courtyard, he pulled me in closer, wrapping his arms around me.

"I thought I was going to go crazy trying to find you," Caio whispered, closing his eyes. He was so relieved that she was safe. He didn't know how he'd react if something had happened to her. It would have been a severe blow to every protective instinct in his body if she ended up in a situation he had previously rescued her from.

I hugged him back, feeling him slightly tremble. 'Sorry for making you worry,' I said. His golden eyes held such pent up anxiety and I wanted to dispel that. I really was fine. I remembered how Bongsu wouldn't even volunteer to kill bugs on the few times we went camping. But Caio had literally captured the men who had assaulted me, and 1 had ordered them to be executed. The contrast in their attitude towards me was overwhelming. It was like they were dealing with two different women, but it was just me all along. 

"Hopefully this should help prevent the same thing from happening again," he countered, pulling out something from his jacket. It was a silver brooch shaped like a flower, with the insignia of the archduke in the center. He pinned it just below the collar of my uniform where it was very visible. "From now on, wear it anywhere you go."