Return to Innocence

It has been five months already, going from one town to another, setting up shop and harsh training. I've grown accustomed to this life but I never forgot my vow. In my current predicament I have come to regretfully accept my or rather this boys weakness. I no longe have the tools that I surly had before but I will simply reacquire them. Although with no memory or guidance in the matter it might be a long journey.

However during my training I can almost feel it, I can feel the energy through my staff, like an oar pushing through water. With each deliberate swing, each snapping strike, I can feel it in my feet as they sweep the morning dew off each blade of grass beneath them. I dance throu the motions one graceful thrust, one light ste…

"Little Guǐzhěn! are you almost done with your training, I need help loading the wagon" Master calls out… and just like that the moment is gone like music that never played.

"The time has come Little Guǐzhěn, we are finally turning back to the kingdome of 龙峰 Lóng fēng. I thought youd be more exited" his chuckle could be heard from the other side of the wagon.

Lóng fēng was the country in which Wúlài had first found me in the mountain pass near Láokǔ gǔ city. I have little memory of this place but Master truly is a wonderful mentor, and has tought me much of the world, if a bit crass at times.

"I'll be right there Master" I quickly chug one of my tonics and gather myself.

"Yes Master, let me help you with that" I pick up the heaviest bag and begin to stuff it in to a space half its size, all it needs is a bit of forceful motivation.

"Little Guǐzhěn do you have any memories of the ongoing conflict, we are about to cross the border back to Lóng fēng. While it was a trivial matter to leave Lóng fēng. I only had to give you a name and claim you were my son to leave but to get back in is another matter altogether."

"I'm sorry master, I cannot recall any conflict." I have seen lots of soldiers on our travels but I thought nothing of it.

"Master please dont just throw the bags in so nonchalantly" I kick a few bags into small openings under the shelves.

"Well if my carefully selected and greatly deliberated. Placing of the bags is not to your liking you are free to adjust them Little Guǐzhěn" He chuckle loudly as he lobs another bag over his shoulder and into the wagon.

"Well, the details of the conflict are of no great importance to us. Just a bunch of nobles quarreling but we do need to visit an old acquaintance of mine to get some documentation. You will have to act as my son and carry my family name for a while" he continued to explain.

"Master?" Another bag hits me square in the face as I paused just for a moment.

"Do not worry little Guǐzhěn the documentation is only valid this side of the border and we won't exactly go thru official channels hahaha" There was a cautious tone in Master's voice.

"Why are you on the floor Guǐzhěn?" he asks feigning surprise as if he didn't just hear the loud thud.

"I just needed to get a better angle of curse, Master, I trust your decision but is it really necessary?." I force another bag in under the shelves using both my feet.

"Little Guǐzhěn you should accept the name Yóumín, it's a strong name and might even open some doors in the future. This is the wish of your master, now stop fussing and accept." he stops throwing bags for a moment.

A simple nod and glans and the matter were settled between us. My mind lingered a while on the tone of his voice, just now. Master Wúlài had acted in an unexpected manner and carried a dignified aura with an authoritative voice, nothing at all like the man he had been traveling with for the past five months.

"Guǐzhěn finish loading the last of the bags I need to head into town one last time" he turned around and waved over his shoulder.

'Have I been making too many rash decisions lately? Was Wúlài not just an ordinary roguish merchant? Come to think of it, what did I really know about Wúlài, could he be dangerous?'

A sudden flash of dread overwhelmed me as Master headed down to town. I shrugged it off during my night training.

but where did it come from? I will have to meditate on it tomorrow. I drink a vial of tonic and head to bed.

"Little Guǐzhěn, I'm starving. wake up, sleepyhead!"

"Yes Master, hu? What time is it?"

"It's time for breakfast and bring me some of that tonic as well, I feel like the heavens themselves are conspiring to crush my head." Wúlài had clearly been out drinking all night again.

"Yes, certainly Master I will get started right away, sorry Master."

"Ahh, it's of little matter, think nothing of it but you might want to go look outside and see if the heavens really are falling down hahaha ouch, my head!"

"Master?"

"I have never seen you miss your morning training, is everything alright little Guǐzhěn?"

"Yes Master, everything is ok."

"Ok, but if something is wrong you must tell me. It might be nothing or it could be a symptom but I won't know if its good or bad unless you tell me. Your body is stronger than average by far, even among adults but your mind is not yet healed." Master struggles agains his headache to speak.

"hmm, little Guǐzhěn let's take the day off, we have been on the road for so long and you are still a boy you should meet some kids your age. You are starting to stand out amongst other kids, you little weirdo hahaha"

"Master, I promise nothing is wrong."

"It's ok you can stop lying, I won't pressure you anymore. However you should stop addressing me as Master, You should get used to calling me dad. You are Guǐzhěn Yóumín from now on, remember that."

"… … …Yes, dad. hmm, that feels weird, do I have to?"

"Shut it you little weirdo, you should respect your dad" Wúlàis chuckle turns in to wince of pain as he suffers last nights pleasures.

"If it makes you feel less weird you can view today as "son and dad" training day, we need to be able to fool those dung-eating border patrols if we run into them." Wúlài quickly drinks the tonic I hand him.

"Yes, Mas… Dad" I don't think I will get used to this.

"Good now let's see if we can find some kids to watch."

"Master, you really should not phrase it like that."

"Like wha…ehm you're right we should find you some kids to play with hahaha" Masters unabashed humor is back.

"Master!" Master is relentless, no wonder he gets in so much trouble.

"Hahaha!" Wúlài has that mischievous grin on his face again.

Wúlài drags me out of the wagon by the hand and heads to the town we are just outside. It's quite a small town for being so close to the border but master says it has a sprawling market center, it's apparently one of the best places to get clothes, glass wares, and jade crafts in this country 鸟风 Niǎo fēng.

Wúlài takes me to all the places he thinks I would enjoy, he shares a few memories of his father, crafting moments that revolve around shared experiences, and tries to recreate memories he had with his own dad.

Our first stop is at a small candy shop where the air is filled with a sweet aroma. Colorful confections line the shelves, and the vibrant assortment of candies brings out the childlike wonder of the patrons. Together, we select a few of the treats, their vivid hues reflecting the jade the town is best known for.

As we continue to wander the market stalls, I am drawn to a display of exquisite jade crafts. Various shades of shiny jade artworks can be found, including of course green jade as well as shades of blue, white, and red. While a limited number of yellow pieces exist, only a single piece stands out for its truly vibrant yellow hue. It is a pendant made from yellow jade, secured within a gleaming metal setting and attached to a leather strap, showcasing the artistry of the town's skilled artisans. truly a master craft.

Our continued explorations lead us to an inviting market square adorned with an array of stalls showcasing a plethora of goods. Wúlài's discerning eye guides me as we peruse the wares on display. Among the vibrant tapestries of fabrics and garments, Wúlài assists me in selecting new clothes that reflect the spirit of the town. Not only do we find garments for me, but he thoughtfully chooses women's clothing for the store and a fresh set of attire for himself.

The charm of the town extends to a lively apple bobbing activity, where barrels of water house floating apples that beckon to be captured. Wúlài and I join in the fun, our determination to catch the elusive apples turning into contagious laughter. The refreshing splashes of water and the thrill of competition create a bond between us, reminiscent of the treasured memories Wúlài once shared with his father.

My stomach began to rumble. It was time to get something to eat. Wúlài always made a point to eat the local specialty dish when passing through this town, sugarcane stir fry and he is delighted to finally share it with someone. The dish tastes strange, sweet, and spicy but not unpleasant. Master Wúlài has already asked for seconds while I am still processing the flavors, it is quite clearly his favorite dish. After finishing the odd but delicious meal Wúlài pushed a crudely wrapped parcel over to me.

"Here this is for you, open it little Guǐzhěn"

"Master, what is this?"

"It's dad, now ask me properly."

"What is this for dad? it's not one of your rusty old trinkets is it?"

"Haha, there you go! but don't disrespect your dad" Wúlài leans over and smacks my head.

"Little Guǐzhěn Yóumín, I wanted to give you something for your second birthday." Master has a mischievous smile again

All I could do in response was offer a confused look.

"I needed some information for your documentation yesterday so you are now thirteen years old as of today, happy birthday! I could not ask for a better son, now open your present" Wúlàis eyes fill with anticipation.

I looked up bewildered and stunned, not sure how to respond, so I opened up the small parcel. It was the vibrant yellow jade pendant faceted in a silver socket that I had looked at this morning, although I had been given things by Wúlài before. It was never presented as a gift and mostly it was practical stuff for my studies.

I'm unsure if I have ever gotten something before. I'm not sure how to react it was not a useful thing nor was it something I would have bought: I felt strange as my body began to almost convulse to let out a scream but my chest and throat were so tight only whimper escaped thru my breath and the strain of the convulsions made my eyes water and only thru momentary breaks in my tight chest was I able to breathe, gasping for air the tightness in my throat and chest loosened and the screams finally came out and tears streamed down my face.

It was the first time Wúlài could see a boy when he looked at Guǐzhěn, almost stunned he was not looking at someone the same age as him it took him some time to react, as he began to stand up to comfort Guǐzhěn the boy threw himself over the table to hug Wúlài, the sudden shift in his perception was too much for Wúlài to handle and even his eyes began to well up in tears.

Wúlài decided that this was enough for today or maybe a bit too much. After the boy had exhausted himself Wúlài put the pendant around his neck and carried him to the wagon on his back. He put the boy to bed and tucked him in. Wúlài then went out to the front carriage.

"I should have paid more attention to Guǐzhěns condition. How could I've been so reckless all this time" His thoughts trailed away as night closed around him.

The smell of steamed pork buns filled the wagon and drew me out of bed. Wúlài's jovial voice called out.

"Good morning sleepy head, two days in a row? we'd better stay for a few more days until your cold clears up little Guǐzhěn."

I clasped the pendant around my neck and nodded

"Yes Master, I must have caught a cold or something"

With a look at the steamed buns, Wúlài beckoned me to get dressed and have some breakfast. I got dressed in one of the new robes Wúlài had bought for me and sat down to have a steamed pork bun.

"I feel it is time for you to get to be a kid around other kids, I remember that there is an orphanage nearby, and there are always kids playing around there." Wúlài glasses over as I eat.

"When you are done eating I will take you there" Wúlài tries his best to use his dad voice, it's good that I have my mouth full or I would chuckle and get into trouble.

After I am done eating we head into town once more, Along the way I pointed out and looked at all the new items on display, Wúlài stopped at a few market stalls and bought a few things here and there while holding hands with me. It was not the first time we had pretended to be father and son, but this time it was different. Both of us and the people seem to notice as well, never before had we gotten so many good deals and free samples and we both made note of it with silent glances. Before even making it around the corner to the orphanage we had more stuff than we had bought yesterday.

"Excellent, there is one group of kids about your age playing football and another bunch running around and playing tag." Master had an excited look on his face.

I look up and give Wúlài a concerned look. With a sheepish smile and a forceful pat on the back Master exclaims.

"Practice! I need to put all this stuff back in the wagon, you got this Guǐzhěn just don't be weird hahaha" he disappeared around the corner before I could respond.

"Don't be weird?… how is that supposed to help, you are the weird one Wúlài." I knew Wúlài would not hear me but it felt better saying it at least.

I don't know how to approach these kids but I was determined to at least observe since it was Wúlài's wish, I found a tree and sat down practicing mindfulness, even if Wúlài was only joking around when he said it, it did feel less awkward to think of it as training.

Kids were a lot noisier when playing than I would have imagined, as I sat there pondering a girl walking up to me. She was a scruffy-looking girl in a simple dress, short messy hair, she bent down at the waist to meet my eyes.

"That's a nice pendant" she exclaimed as she scooped it up in her palm to take a closer look.

"Thanks my dad bought it for me as a birthday gift" I responded happily.

"So what? Do you think you're better than us? Well, it does not matter, I just thought it was nice and besides, tag you're it!"

She quickly tapped my shoulder and spirited away laughing. It did not take long for me to realize I'd been fooled by the little girl. I understood the game well enough, a smile of determination washed over my face as I calmly stood up.

I was not going to let a little kid outplay me like that, two quick side steps and I was quickly in front of the little girl who was still looking over her shoulder at where I was just sitting. With an imposing stature, I reached out my hand and tapped the girl on the head with the back of my hand, she put both her hands on her head and turned around.

"Tag your it," I laugh with a sheepish smile.

The girl was dumbfounded and stunned for a bit, looking back over her shoulder in disbelief just long enough time for me to run away and hide with the other kids. She brushed her nose with the back of her hand.

"Alright, looks like new kid got some moves" She quickly scanned over the group of kids and ran toward them looking for me.

With a sigh of relief, Wúlài who was still hiding around the corner holding all the goods smiled and walked back to the wagon.

"it looks like Guǐzhěn will be alright after all." Wúlài had been worried that Guǐzhěn had lost his inner child due to the event he had endured all those months ago.

He was doubting whether he had made the right choice to bring the boy with him but it appears Guǐzhěn is doing fine, although there is still lots of healing ahead, at least he is on the road to recovery.

As Wúlài returned to the wagon and began to pack away all the new merchandise. He began to rummaging thru all of his trinkets he realized that little Guǐzhěn did not have any toys to play with, only dusty old books about herbs and various trinkets he had lent to him for learning, Guǐzhěn is doing fine for the moment but still needs to have a chance to be a kid once we leave town.

Instead of setting up the shop, he decided to head back into town and buy some toys to bring along for Guǐzhěn to play with. Not exactly sure what to get, Wúlài bartered for a whole bunch of different toys ranging from dolls and puppets to marbles enough for little Guǐzhěn to play with a new toy each day of the week, Wúlài noticed the ball the other kids were playing with was barely holding together so he bought a new ball so that Guǐzhěn could bring it with him tomorrow and share it with them he also bought a box of hard candy to have on the road.

The day had grown darker and Wúlài was already preparing dinner as Guǐzhěn returned, he had a big smile on his face, bigger than Wúlài had ever seen little Guǐzhěn smile before, he always had a very stoic face and even despite his obvious appearance Wúlài often forgot he was talking with someone much younger than him Wúlài would often but only momentarily view little Guǐzhěn as a stern older brother, he would remind himself by calling Guǐzhěn, little Guǐzhěn, but today Guǐzhěn was smiling.

He was excited to recount all the games he played and the kids he met, in particular, were two boys who taught him how to play football both were a bit older one quite tall and lanky with a pointy chin who had a strange accent named 大牙Dàyá, and the other with scrapes on his knees and elbows named 杀手牙Shāshǒuyá he was the goalkeeper but you'd be more likely see him wrestling someone on the opponent's team he was a bit shorter than the other boy but still a head taller than Guǐzhěn, then the Girl named 粗糙牙齿 Cūcāo yáchǐ who tagged him she was always laughing and tricking the other kids and playing pranks, there was a smaller kid named 迷你牙 Mínǐyá he did not really play with the other kid instead he was face down on the ground looking for bugs to put in girls hair, and an older girl 聪明牙齿 Cōngmíng yáchǐ, she sat in a tree the whole time whistling, reading a book and looking at the clouds

Guǐzhěn spoke so fast and excitedly that he ran out of breath. Wúlài took the opportunity to hand Guǐzhěn his dinner which he scarfed down like he had not eaten in days just so he could continue to tell Wúlài all about his day and Wúlài gladly listened, the hour grew late and Guǐzhěn was just getting about done retelling his day.

"I'm glad you had a good time because it looks like we will have to stay another few days" said Wúlài

Guǐzhěn's face lit up as he heard this and he nodded vigorously the two of them stayed up a bit longer laughing and telling jokes Wúlài even taught Guǐzhěn a few pranks and jokes to play on the other kids and Wúlài showed off all the toys he had bought for Guǐzhěn and told him to bring the ball and the marbles with him tomorrow.

Guǐzhěn had trouble falling asleep that night even after taking his tonic even though he was excited to stay a few more days he should not continue to miss his training. A surge of clouded memories and feelings occupied his mind and kept him up late into the night.

I woke up in a normal fashion the next morning, got dressed, and snuck outside to not wake Wúlài, the air was raw and cold, and the twilight of sunrise was just beginning, I felt a bit strange, almost embarrassed, why was I acting so childish yesterday.

"I should focus on training and getting stronger I need to break this curse so that I can return to my own body if I still have a body to return to that is"

I continued my training vigorously as normal except for occasional stray thoughts about yesterday's distraction which is slightly annoying. The morning's training was done in time to prepare breakfast and wake Wúlài, much to my surprise master Wúlài was already awake and setting up the wagon to sell some wares.

"Good morning Guǐzhěn I made the fire already why don't you get started on breakfast while I finish up here" he spoke over his shoulder while fiddling with the counter.

There was nothing strange about making breakfast for master Wúlài but this was the first time I had been asked to do so, which felt odd. To my recollection during these eight months of traveling together, It was easy to count on one hand how many times Wúlài had been awake before me, assuming he slept at all of course, it was quite common for Wúlài to get back during my morning training after a rowdy night.

"So what will you do today Guǐzhěn, will you head back to the orphanage and play with the other kids again?" he asked as he took a bowl of rice and beans.

"They're not all orphans!" I snapped back. surprising even myself as well as Wúlài.

Wúlài apologetically replied

"Of course, I meant nothing by it little Guǐzhěn, I know it's a war refuge as well a lot of kids stay there while their parents are working or serving in the war." Wúlài apologized casually.

I did not know any of this and could not explain why I had snapped at Master Wúlài.

"Master I'm sorry I do not know why I said that, I don't think I will be going back. I have been feeling a bit strange today." There is definitely something strange going on.

"Guǐzhěn, I think you should return. Besides you have to give them the ball I bought yesterday and like I said those kids are victims of this war they need something to distract them from their hardship, a new friend and a good ball might be just what they need right now. Guǐzhěn you should go and deliver the ball and play with them and bring the marbles too, now listen to your dad and do what I say" He said chuckling cautiously.

I resigned myself to deliver the ball to the kids but then I will train the rest of the day, I do not have time to play with these children. I made my way into town and down to the war refuge. I recognized some of the kids already playing football but it was more of a wrestling free for all than a football match.

With confident steps I walked into the middle of the courtyard in the path of the ball and stopped it nonchalantly with my staff, maybe it was my presence or the calm in the middle of the field but just standing there I quickly garnered everyone's attention. I swoop the ball up and put the new ball down with a confident smirk on my face, I kicked the ball over the pile of wrestling kids and into the goal.

"One point to My team!" I then tossed the old and worn ball to the side and all the other kids stood up, dusted themselves off, and got ready for battle.

A bell started to ringing and morning had quickly turned to midday the other kids started to head into the building, one of the kids a younger energetic boy 疤痕牙 Bāhényá with a big scar running up the side of his neck disfiguring his right ear called out to me.

"It's time for dinner, hurry up new kid or all the bread will be gone." He motioned his hand for me to follow as he ran in.

I followed Bāhényá inside. It was a simple building leading into a big hall with lots of tables and chairs. For dinner was a hearty soup with various beans and vegetables all the kids would get one and a half ladles of soup and a small bun. The long lanky kid Dàyá and Bāhényá, quickly palmed two buns each, seeing this I quickly did the same and gave a glance to the two boys who both smiled sheepishly in approval.

The two of them sat down at a table in the back corner of the room where the scruffy girl Cūcāo and the stout boy Shāshǒuyá were already sitting.

"Look who's back," said Cūcāo.

"have a seat, but unless you can pay tribute you owe me a favor" she continued.

I scan the faces of everyone around the table for a clue as to what she was referring to. They all have mischievous expressions, curious as to what I would do, the girl put her elbow on the table opening her hand, "tribute!" she said again, during the staredown. Cōngmíng who was reading up in the tree came and sat down as she did she glanced at me.

I read the mood and take out the extra piece of bread I had taken, Cūcāo´s face lit up but just as it did I chomped down on the bun nearly fitting the whole piece in my mouth.

"I guess I owe you a favor" I mumbled.

The bun was surprisingly soft and delicious, I sat down trying not to choke on the bread. The other boys all laughed and even Cōngmíng chuckled a bit. Cūcāo smiled although disappointed that I was not another easy mark to get some extra bread.

I asked everyone around the table if anyone knew how to play marbles. The stout kid Shāshǒuyá had a vague idea, he had seen some other kids play in a different town before coming here. We all decided we should head out after dinner and give it a try.

The idea was to place one of the best marble close to the wall and get your own marble closest to it by tossing other marble but not hitting the wall. We ate and laughed throughout dinner.

Then after dinner, we played marbles excitedly for a while and Cūcāo the scruffy girl won the best marble at the end of the day. She was boasting proudly, teasingly we all agreed she only won because she was the closest to the ground. As night was drawing close Bāhényá asked if I will stay here with them from now on.

"No he will go home to his dad'' Cūcāo interjected.

"Well I still owe you a favor, why don't I make you all breakfast tomorrow" I added.

"Why should they get breakfast? You owe me the favor if you invite them, it doesn't count."

"You want to eat breakfast just the two of us?"

The girl turned red like an apple.

"That is not what I said" she screamed and stormed off.

The boy all laughed but the older girl Cōngmíng rolled her eyes and lazily walked after her, I was clueless as to what happened, the boys punched me in the shoulder.

"Don't worry we will make sure she comes" said Bāhényá.

"Ok good my dad's wagon is just outside town up the hill, be sure to bring everyone, see you tomorrow" I waved and walked off.

As I come back to back to the wagon, Wúlài was hustling customers as usual when he noticed me in the corner of his eye. Waving eagerly and kicking the wagon door open with his foot while receiving payment from a customer.

"Hey dad, can I have a few coins?" I said begrudgingly, glancing at the coins in Wúlàis's hand.

"Coins!? Why do you need coins?" Scratching his chin and turning up his nose Wúlài added.

"Guǐzhěn you still have not paid me back hahaha, and now you ask for even more. oh my what an ungrateful child I have, taking money from my hand just as I earned it"

"Yeah yeah, save your drama for the next sucker to walk up to your wagon, hand it over you good for nothing dad, I invited some friends over for breakfast and I need to buy some buns and meat" These lines were a modification of one of the many scenarios we would hustle people with.

"Oh, little Guǐzhěn you are having friends over!" Overjoyed by this he completely dropped his mock facade and returned to his jovial nature, he immediately shut the side of the wagon cutting off several customers mid-sentence as he pulled me out of the wagon he halfheartedly waved his hand over his shoulder and yelled.

"Sorry, we're closed" dragging me behind him all the way back to town.

"What should we make? Should we make sugarcane stir-fry? maybe pork buns? or should we buy some chocolate? I think there was a stall that sold it around here. It's really good, they have roast ducks over there too."

"Wúlài! I'm making breakfast… I'm not holding a banquet, besides I'm not sure if everyone will show up. I think I upset one of the girls."

"Oh, you are having girls over as well little Guǐzhěn? hahaha." Wúlài nudged me with his elbow.

"Master, please pay attention. I said I'm not sure she will show up. I think I upset her."

"First of all, it's dad now. Second, Guǐzhěn you have to tell me what happened."

I told Wúlài everything that had happened as we walked to different stalls buying stuff for breakfast.

"Haha little Guǐzhěn I thought you were smart, the girl you talked about might like you and you embarrassed her in front of her friends."

"She likes me? I… but I…"

Little Guǐzhěn you're a handsome boy and with all the training you've done you have quite a strong body, don't worry she will show up and you can apologize tomorrow.

That's not the problem Wúlài, I'm not a child, how should I tell her?