chapter 5

I wait till he's close enough to me before I can say anything. "What were you two talking about?" I ask Zack with my eyes still pinned on Jeremy as he puts on his helmet.

"Seriously?" Zack opens his hands in the air. Zack sounds irate when he says, "You couldn't tell me he lives across from you." but I am more upset with him.

"Why?!" I fly my hands open. "I don't know why you can't resist him, but if we are going to stay friends you can't go anywhere near him." I can't hold it any longer. Who in the world adores a murderer? 

"What?" Zack taters back. "Is this some kind of option?" He asks.

"Mmhmm." I fold my hands on my chest, "So you better choose. Him or me?" I say.

He smiles. "Ariana, I think you are being paranoid. Let's just go to school."

"Him…" The moment I make the statement, a zooming breeze brushes my face, flipping my hair and my short flare skirt. Even with his dark helmet and the fast pace of his bike our eyes still connect. I take a deep breath, "or me?" I turn my face to Zack.

"I'm not gonna do this with you. Let's just go," he says as he walks towards his car. As he's about to open it, he pauses and looks back at me. His eyes match with shock to find me at the same spot. He reads the seriousness written all over me. He stares at me for a few seconds, then scoffs his way into his car. The moment he drives off, I feel a pang of itching guilt. Did I overreact? Was I wrong to ask him to choose between a girl he has known for years and a murderer he just met yesterday?

  I've always thought from my house to school is a thirty minutes walk, but I never knew Thirty minutes can be longer than an hour. My feet hurt so badly that I begin limping to school. Luckily for me, I have music for the first period, missing it won't be a biggy, because I don't like the class and the teacher couldn't care less. Finally, I get to school just a few minutes before the bell rings for the second period. Even if I think chemistry is such a boring magical class, I still need to pay attention so I get good grades, otherwise, Mr. Langford would scold me for life.

"Who can tell me the difference between an atom and a molecule?" Mrs. Smith asks, with the whiteboard marker between her fingers. There goes the questions. An atom is the smallest unit of a chemical element, while a molecule is a group of two or more atoms that are held together by a chemical bond. Yeah, I'm one of those students that buries the answer to a teacher's question in my head except I'm asked directly. While the school show-off Princess Alisyn answers the questions, my eyes meet Zack. He's in the middle-front seat, doodling on his book. All of a sudden I feel guilty. I've never seen Zack's face this full. I hate when we fight, especially when it's because of the good-for-nothing Jeremy. Speaking of… I see Jeremy seated close to the window by the left, a row before mine. He's seriously listening to Alisyn's explanation about atoms and molecules. And because I'm seated far from him by the right, it gives me enough time to stare. His lashes are now longer. I used to think it wouldn't grow anymore when we were kids, but I was wrong about a lot of things about him. I don't know what Alisyn said that's so funny, but I watch him laugh, looking more handsome as his cheek hollows even more. Damn it, he looks so innocent. Not being able to move my gaze away, he catches me staring, then fear helps me move my eyes away. I don't think I can look into his eyes for more than a second.

 I and Zack meet at his locker after chemistry class. He totally avoids me like I'm an irrelevant ghost. And I silently watch him dump some of his books inside his locker. I am finding it a little difficult to apologize to him. He's the one who is cuddling up with my nightmare, he is the one who's supposed to be sorry. I shrug down the strap of my school bag and clear my throat. "Fine!" I finally let out. "I'm sorry, okay." 

He zips up his bag and turns to face me. His face is somehow gloomy. "I shouldn't have asked you to choose between me and that…guy." I roll my eyes. "I'm sorry for coming at you like that." There he has it.

He takes in a deep breath, looking all weary. "It's fine. I'm also sorry for making you worry so much about me these past few days," he says, and I smile, so wide, probably revealing my sharp canines.

"Gosh! I hate it when we fight!" I whine.

He gives a weak smile. "Yeah, I almost fell sick," he says.

We go to the cafeteria together and he orders his favorite tacos, forgetting the ketchup, but I help him out. He seems off, he never forgets his ketchup. Eating my sushi, I gabble with him about how I arrived at school. "It felt like for-ever!" I say before realizing he's not paying attention to me but to his phone. He keeps looking at it like he's meditating on a text or something. "Zack?" I call him. Like always, I worry. He doesn't answer, and I can bet he didn't hear me. Whoa. "Zack," I tap his hand which is lying on the table. He raises his head at me. He doesn't look shocked that I may be calling him for the past five minutes and he has not been responding. His coffee eyes now look like that of a thunderous cloud, and it scares me. "Are you okay?" I say it as calmly as possible so it doesn't look like I'm prying. But my job as his best friend is to pry on his moody ass.

"Yeah…just my dad texting me about him and his beloved wife…"

"You mean your mom." I cut him off.

"Mmhmm." He sips from his water.

"He said they won't be coming anytime soon." 

"What? Why? Who then is going to stay with you?" I ask all concerned and bother.

"You know, they shouldn't mistake your prudent life for maturity." That comes out more like an insult than the truth. "I'm sorry but—"

"Arianna, it's fine. Someone is coming over…"

"Who?" I ask curiously.

"Damn…" he rubs his hand all over his head. "It's a long story and I promise to tell later, buh right now, I just wanna fucking get ready for my fucking partie," he says, looking more alive than two seconds ago.

"Okay," I say tentatively as I sip my water. "Buh you know you ain't supposed to use the F-word." I take a bite from my sushi. 

"And you know it's wrong to say ain't instead of isn't." He fires back.

Dang it.

I laugh. Having a white skin mother makes me seem less African, I mean, you can hardly tell from the way I speak but certainly know by my colored skin. While laughing, Alisyn walks towards us. "Zacky." She trails her hand on Zack's shoulder as she sashays past us. Alisyn has always been the conceited one. She was the first to know Kaela. Their friendship was exaggerated. They were like the goddess of Stoneybrook. I never had a problem with it, not until Kaela moved into our class in fifth grade where she met Jeremy, that was the moment I lost my best friend to her. I tried several times to make the whole friendship thing work between me, Kaela, and Alisyn, but it was only bearable at some point. I see her take the seat before Jeremy. I'm not all that surprised, considering the feelings she has for Jeremy. 

 "Guess I'm not the only fan of a murderer," Zack says.

I take a deep breath. 

"Hey, relax. Trust me, he's not the worst person," he adds and goes back to his tacos. I never said he was the worst person, I don't think it's right for me to sympathize with a killer. Now I can't get my mind off what Jeremy and Zack talked about.

                                             JEREMY.

I can't stop thinking about what Zack said. How did he know about him? And why did he think I had a connection? Am I doing the right thing to keep my mouth shut? Damn! Zack seems to be gullible, and those types of people get hurt easily.

"Hey," Alisyn says as she sits before me.

I smile. "Alisyn Mirabella Wealth," I say.

"Jeremy Jacob Oscar. My JJO," She says with her sweet voice that can melt ice.

"You can become the princess of vibing," I tell her. One word to describe Alisyn is thoughtful. And despite all her colorful dresses, her long lashes, and her nails, there's a brilliant brain up in her head.

"Oh, stop playing." She waves over her face.

I silently watch her. I can still remember the first time she visited me in juvie, which was four years ago. She was crying wounded tears, asking me…No, she was begging me to say I wasn't the one who killed Kaela. That was the moment I actually felt like a murderer, watching a beautiful soul as Alisyn crying painfully and I couldn't do anything. I can't imagine the pain she went through or she's going through. If I had superpowers, I would have gone back in time and stopped that tragedy from happening.

"I'm sorry I stopped visiting. My mom…" 

"It's fine," I cut her short. "So…" I bring down my brows, "How have you been ruling your kingdom?"

She laughs, and her neatly arranged white teeth appear. She's the second person I know with the most beautiful smile. "Well, I'm still me. I go to the gym almost every day. I prefer heels to sandals. I still watch Harry Potter every night." She pauses, then smiles. I can see her sky-blue eyes well up with salty water. Harry Potter was one of Mikaela's favorites. She would either read the book or watch the movie with her best buddy Alisyn. She sucks her teeth. "I still want to be a neurologist, and ummm…well, I'm still trying so hard to fall in love with the fiction world." She points to my copy of 'Good girls guide' that's lying before me on the table.

"No way…" I laugh.

"Yeah…" she laughs.

I let the silence fall between us once again. I fall back to the chair. "Alisyn, I'm sorry…"

"Don't be," she says at once. "There's nothing in this world that can convince me you did it."

I don't know why she has such faith in me. Even when there is solid evidence that shows I did it, she still doesn't believe it. "Alisyn…"

"Stop! If you won't tell me what actually happened that day, then please don't lie to me about it…" she says, and I slightly nod.

"I'll see you around." She stands up and kisses my cheek, then walks away.

                                            ARIANA.

I know I'm not a strong girl, guess that's why I keep having anxiety attacks and have to deal with depression at my age. But I'm surviving, and a survivor is a champion.

  I burst open the front door with every courage I could muster. Being alone at home with a monster just across from you can be terrifying. I take my bath first, then I get busy by rearranging my bookshelf. When I'm done, I pick one of my favorites, not sure If I can still call it my copy of Harry Potter. I remember the times I had arguments with Kaela over it; on the day of her passing, we got violent, but seeing her dead body didn't stop me from retrieving it. Was I wrong to want something that was once mine? Or was it heartless of me to take it from her just because she was powerless? I don't know why I agreed to play that stupid game. What if I hadn't played, maybe I and Kaela won't be such frienemies, and maybe I won't have to pressurize her into giving back the book she earned. While reflecting on five years ago, my door dingles and shrinks me out of my thoughts. Charity walks in looking surprised to see how startled she made me. it was as if my soul left me. "Just a simple knock will do," I say as I put down the book on my nightstand, and clutch my arm over the pillow on my lap.

"Guess who came to visit me at KREAMY?" She asks, approaching me, a little smile stuck on her face.

"I don't know. Who?" I ask cluelessly.

"Your best friend," she sits on my bed, a little closer to me.

"Jeremy?" I ask, and my voice comes out loud.

"What?" Charity brings down her brows and pushes back her head, staring at me like I have just grown a horn. Damn it. "No," she finally says. "It was Zack. And it's pretty brave of you to still consider Jeremy as your best friend."

"I thought you were talking in the past tense?" I say, sounding defensive.

"I was talking in the past tense, you…" her cheek swells up as she finds a decent insultive word for me, "memorial princess…" she continues. "But I wasn't talking in the tense five years ago…" she air-quotes the word tense.

"Fine. We both know there's no way I and Jeremy can be the way we used to be." 

"Yeah, because Daddy would rip out your lungs and probably feed it to Mr. Douglas," she says, walking to my dresser.

I furrow my brows, trying to recall if Mr. Douglas is a man or a Dog that Mr. Langford would feed my lungs to. "Isn't Mr. Douglas your boss?" I ask.

"Mmhmm," she mutters, smearing my strawberry pink lipstick on her lips.

"Why would…" I take a pause, "why would dad feed my lungs to your Boss?"

She turns to me. "Because my boss is literally the most reachable Vampire Dad can get."

Okay, I don't want to hear further.

"Whatever. Why did Zack come to see you?" I ask as I put my hair in a ponytail.

"To invite me to his birthday party." 

"What?!" I smile. Zack and Charity barely tolerate each other. There was a time Charity called Zack a nuisance just because he won't stop shouting whenever he scores one point over me during a video game. I've never seen Zack that furious. He made Charity cry all night by calling her bonehead, and telling her no college would ever give a dull headed girl as her admission, especially OXFORD.  I mean Zack can be a bitch sometimes, but he's still the sweetest guy I know.

"Yeah, I still can't believe it." 

"So…are you going?" I wiggle my body as I ask.

"What makes you think I came home this early," she flips her sun-gold hair. I grin. Thank God. At least Mr. Langford won't mind If I come home a little late since her golden child will be with me. "Come on…" She stretches out her hand to me,"let's go get something hot to wear…" she says. I shake my head while smiling, then I take her hand. When we get outside, I see a gymnast figure talking to Jeremy at the front of his house. His biceps aren't that big but he looks like someone who lifts 40 pounds for a living. And his Auburn hair which seems like it's urgently in need of soap and water falls on top of his brows. Even from a five-meter distance, I can still see his six packs clearly, or whatever people call the ribs of a male without belly fat covering them. The Auburn dude might seem like a tough guy, but Jeremy remains the one standing over him. I guess his workouts took some of his height, or maybe  6ft2' Jeremy is considered too tall for his age. "Do you know him?" Charity asks beside me.

"Uh?" I look at her, "Oh, No, not really." I shake my head.

"Didn't know he had other friends. Or maybe they were cellmates," Charity says walking to her car. Maybe Juvie wouldn't be so bad if he made some friends. And that's even scary for Jeremy to make friends with ex-convicts, but it's scarier to know that he's also an ex-convict. 

"Hey! Are you coming?" Charity calls from her rolled-down window. I nod and go to her. I request for Charity to stop by the school first so I can pick up my math textbook from my locker so I can use it to solve my math homework which the deadline is tomorrow. She agrees. 

 When I get to school, there are still a few students hovering around. Due to the hot blasting sun, I think the clock would be ticking to four, or a few minutes past four. Walking to the hallway, the only sound I can hear is that of my sandals which keeps echoing in my ears. When I turn into the Hallway, I see Alisyn sticking out something from a locker. To be honest, I'm shocked to see the high school princess in school at this time, but not to ponder, she's simply a freak.

"Alisyn?" I call her. She pauses. Her hand is still inside the locker. After a second, she slowly brings out her hand and puts it behind her. Obviously hiding something. I honestly do not care what it is that she's hiding, but I like the way she's acting shifty, like a criminal who has been caught. "What are you still doing in school?" I take one step forward, looking at her with suspicion. She smiles, and her teeth glitter.

"You know there are some students who love extracurricular activities," She says.

"By Extracurricular activities you mean detention?" I ask rhetorically.

"No, I don't think anyone loves that."

"Mikaela did," she says. There she goes again. "Because she gets to have enough time to read that Harry Potter book she got from you." I know Alisyn and Mikaela were BFFs but she is always reminding me about how poor my friendship with Mikaela was, it's almost like saying I am responsible for her death. "You know I couldn't find the book in any of Mikaela's stuff. I can swear she had it with her the day she was murdered." She squints her eyes.

I silently look at her for a few seconds, then I smile. "If you want to accuse me, be more polite, because it's pathetic of you to think you can scare me," I say and turn away.

"I think you killed her!" She stops me from taking a step.