I hope this new me lasts

Hey, what's wrong? Lei asked interrupting my lewd daydreaming. Ah, nothing! I just want to look at your face. I missed you, this and us, I don't want to leave here, ever!, I said moving closer to Lei and touching her chin. Lei smiled and kissed me on the lips then turned to the sunset. Wow!, they certainly have beautiful sunsets in London. I miss you too, this and us!, Lei added caressing my face and smiling like her smiles when we were young girls. The old Leila is back and I don't intend to let her go again, not this time, not tomorrow, never again!

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I don't want to ever leave this breathtaking place but Lei and I need to go back to New York for her therapy and my meetings, again! However we try to be at peace and happy in our lives, there comes a time when we need to face reality. We can always come back to the better days when Lei and I are happy and complete. But when we came back to the hospital and me on my meetings, it felt weird and lonely. Like Lei and I bonded so well I lost my drive, my power. Yet, I gained love and my sense of freedom form the past and my hurts. So to fuel my energy and passion back on its track and ultimate strength I went to the gym and hit it off the treadmill and lifted weights to tighten my grip, my muscles and abs.

Leila was back in the hospital and she feels great about it. She is no longer the grumpy and frowning lady I met before London and now I believe that she is getting well. Leila responds perfectly in her therapies and makes casual conversations with the nurses, doctors and other patients in the hospital just like what she used to do and who she was before. She is now the friendliest woman there and it's awesome! Maybe, she just needed a break from all the stress at the lab and me. I attended several meetings and since I prepared for these from my work outs, I pulled all off and still got the time to get a Starbucks coffee and visit Leila at the hospital.

But when I arrived at Leila's room, she wasn't there. The nurse advised that Leila is doing her check-ups. Though her surgeries were successful the doctors and scientists needed to be sure she is fit and her wounds are already healed especially the eyes and the hips.

I still haven't rested well from jetlag after we came back from London, so I didn't know that I slept after drinking the coffee. I woke and still no sign of Lel. I got bored and walked to her therapy room near on the third floor where the gym and spa are located. In the gym there is a karate and judo master who teaches the patients to make use of their new leg or arm and Lei was doing that when I saw her hitting a life size punching bag. Master Shi is a famous Chi Instructor and Karatedo champion in China. I haven't spoken to him for years now since I got busy with business and the expansion of my brands.

Bionics have been popular to the masses and market for about five years now and Leila is the Brand Ambassador for Bionic Incorporated that will be launching this coming March. Yahhh!!!. Ha yah...ha yah...ha yah..!, Leila was kicking butts and the punching bag like it didn't hurt. She even uses her arms to block Master Shi's punches and hits. Leila is a natural, I thought drooling with her hot outfit of black tank top and tight pants and sneakers. Her curves and sexiness is one thing but her sweaty but sweet pungent smell is definitely hot, for me. I'm weird I know. I love her and I have know doubt that even is she didn't shower for months I'd still make love to her again and again, hehe. That's an insane example but that's how I adore her. But what if Leila, this bionic woman who's talented, strong and beautiful, changes her heart and falls for someone else? Then, where would that leave me? I am rich, pretty, famous and successful but why do I feel insecure when it comes to Leila.

I still couldn't think of a way to make her totally happy and that is what I always fear loving her. Whatever happened to us in London stays in London and what happens to us here in New York is what is. The truth that Leila has this tendency to self-preservation, to have moods and alone time. She never wants one to be clingy but is sweet and clingy herself. She is a strong woman but weak when it comes to falling in love and don't usually say sorry for she is proud and believes that she's always on the right. Then, why do I still stay and love her?, because I just do. Because she gets me and I get her too. Sometimes I feel that I am not good enough for her or thinks that what if I don't meet her expectations, will she then leave me again and then come back when she feels like it or when she feels bored or lonesome? That's hard and it hit me hard.

Leila saw me and smiled, she was about to walk towards me but I then thought of the hurtful things she did to me that made me look stupid, crazy and weak. I felt sad and angry, since I was really tired (form the jetlag and from running after Leila I think) I turned my back and walked away to my car.

Hey! Sasa? Marissa?....., Leila called out for me and was saying a joke or something but I didn't want to hear and left the hospital. I went straight to my building and suite calling my assistant to get me a massage therapist. I took a shower and been breathing heavily and continuously like I lost a game or a business deal, I felt so low I wanted to cry. Gerrie did call for a therapist and about an hour the girl came wearing a mask and a sexy outfit. Aha!, so therapists wear this type of clothing, how hot, I thought while lying on my bed, my chest lying flat on the blanket and my arms on both sides. I took my top and pants off because I ordered for a full massage.