I was feeling dazed.
My overheated head was working much slower than usual.
I was just pretending to be looking through the bookshelves, and the words that were reflected in my eyes were being kicked out before they could even enter my mind.
I thought my heart might calm down if I read the titles of the books on the bookshelf one by one, but it was all meaningless actions.
'Please be still.'
The books placed in front of my nose did not enter my eyes.
All I could see was his face, which had just been smiling at me, filling my field of vision.
His eyes, filled with warm light like the sun, were reflecting my own dyed-red face… At that moment, his tender touch, which had carefully wiped my lips with a soft handkerchief, replayed itself endlessly in my mind as if it had just happened.
Despite the sweltering heat that clouded my mind, I persisted in recalling these memories in such vivid detail. So how could there be any room for any words to enter my mind?
It was only later that I realized that I had drifted away from him because I was immersed in my own thoughts while repeating these meaningless actions. Only then did my mind begin to find its cool when the warmth and scent I felt next to me disappeared.
I turned my head and looked at where he was.
He was still standing in the same spot where he started, slowly reading the books on the bookshelf.
When I found out his location, my body naturally moved toward his direction.
However, my mind, which had regained its cool, stopped my steps toward him. The fleeting moment that resulted was enough time to clear my messy head.
Leaving behind the emotions that started to overflow as soon as I saw him, I turned my head and looked at the bookshelf in front of me.
After all, if I were to return to his side right now, the same cycle would repeat. Perhaps it would be better to keep a distance like this and cool down my mind even just a little bit.
While having such thoughts, I felt a sense of emptiness and the desire to return to his side. It seemed ridiculous even to myself, but if I didn't go to such lengths, I would end up standing by his side like before, unable to do anything like a fool.
I didn't want that.
Looking back now, it's a little embarrassing, but what happened on the street before was, in a way, the situation I wanted.
It was because coming out to the night market today wasn't just to look around the streets with him. Deep down, I was hoping for something like that to happen in the future.
However, unlike this overflowing enthusiasm, I knew very well that if such things were to happen to me again, just like before, my mind wouldn't be able to endure.
So, I needed some time to catch my breath.
"It's not fair…"
Seeing him calmly browsing the bookshelf with the same composed face as usual slightly annoyed me.
I was the one going through emotional turmoil because of him, yet he seemed unaffected, with a serene expression on his face. It felt somewhat unfair. Strictly speaking, the previous events were entirely a result of my own actions, so I had no one to blame but myself.
Still, the feeling of being left behind in my relationship with him didn't change.
No matter how hard I tried to close the gap, he always shook my heart with just one gesture.
'Isn't this too unfair?'
As I muttered these words inwardly with a sense of unfairness, an uncontrollable small smile appeared on my lips.
It was a complaint expression, not a genuine expression of discontent, triggered by the memory of his gaze upon me.
I turned my head away from him again and looked at the bookshelf.
The heat in my mind seemed to have subsided significantly compared to before. As I calmly surveyed the bookshelf with a sincere heart, unlike before, I began to spot several familiar book titles that I had read at least once.
Since this was meant to pass the time while sipping tea, it would be better to choose familiar books that I knew well rather than completely unknown ones.
"<The Lake of Stars>, <The Fairy's House>, <The Wizard and the Wooden Doll>…"
I murmured the titles of the books that caught my eye.
They were all thin storybooks suitable for children to read, but I had no hesitation in pulling them out from the bookshelf. Not only were they as light as fairy tales and could be read in a short time, but these three books were also his favorites.
'Fairy tales? You have that kind of taste?'
'What's wrong with fairy tales? They have their own lessons to teach. Besides, the stories always end with a happy ending.'
'That's not always the case, you know…'
At my words, he took out these three books
Since I had also read those books before, I knew how the stories in them ended, even without him reading a word.
'A Happy ending'…Back then, it was a phrase I casually overlooked without much thought. But now, recalling the fact that he came to know this world through reading books, I suddenly remembered his words. He said, even if we couldn't read the endings of the books, stories always have an ending.
Then what was the ending of the book he had read?
Perhaps I would never be able to find an answer to that.
But it didn't matter. The ending of that nameless story was no longer an important issue.
The ending I had set for myself was undoubtedly a happy one.
That alone was enough.
[I found it.]
So, for now, I should remove this bothersome shadow right in front of me.
***
"What are you…? My kindred? No, it feels strange to say that you are my own kind?"
It was a sharp voice that felt like a knife pointing at my throat.
It wasn't a tone that could come from the mouth of a young girl who seemed to be the same age as Alphonse, who had just turned seven. The golden eyes resembling those of a dragon, visible within the robe covering her face, emitted a menacing glow.
How should I react to this?
When I turned around abruptly, the gaze directed at me was unsettling.
Suddenly, my whole body felt cold. Could this be what they call "dragon fear"? It felt like something was pressing down on my entire body, but since I had already experienced something similar to this, thanks to my father, I was able to regain my composure relatively easily.
Although I had certainly mentioned wanting to see a dragon when I first came to Merohim, I had never expressed a desire to see the original dragon so soon.
Various circumstances indicated that the girl in front of me was the dragon I knew, but paradoxically, this only added to the confusion and left me unsure of how to respond to this strange situation.
She would become a very important presence for Elena in the future, so I couldn't judge whether it was truly the right thing for me to make contact with her so suddenly. If the encounters that should have taken place five years later were expedited because of me, it was difficult for me to predict what consequences might arise from it.
The original story had already been completely entangled because of me, but unlike previous encounters, the meeting between Elena and the girl before me marked a significant turning point
in the story.
I had pledged to stay by her side and not worry about the future, but the sudden appearance of such a being in front of me was something that even I couldn't easily dismiss.
Honestly, even if I excluded everything else, the problem was how she would react upon hearing my origin.
As Kraus, widely known in the world as a legendary dragon slayer, it was a completely different matter for her as a dragon to hear about my origin and resolve her doubts and how she would treat me afterward.
Who knows, maybe there was someone among her ancestors whom she didn't like, so she might dislike Kraus.
But rather than staying quiet like this, it seemed better to say something, no matter what.
Even if she was a dragon who had lived for over a thousand years, she wouldn't be flying around in the Archmage's domain, risking her life.
I slightly bowed my head and greeted her.
"Greetings, esteemed being. I am Damian Kraus, who is in working as the temporary head for Count Kraus."
As if lost in thought, she put her fingers on her head and thought hard about something. Upon hearing my introduction, she looked at my face again with a twinkle in her eyes. Then she finally snapped her fingers as if she had remembered something.
"Kraus!! That's why I felt that way! Somehow, it's been a thousand years, so I can't remember… Sigh!"
Her bright voice sounded relieved as if she had resolved an unanswered question. Immediately after, she covered her mouth and started looking around in a flustered manner. I thought she had set up some soundproof barrier when she spoke loudly, but apparently, that wasn't the case.
However, this appearance perfectly matched the description of her in the novel, so I approached her with a slightly different feeling. The original characters I had encountered until now were somehow different from the images I had in my mind.
Fortunately, she didn't seem to pay much attention to the name Kraus. Instead, she seemed to focus more on the fact that her doubts had been cleared.
She glanced around carefully, and when she didn't feel any gaze, she let out a sigh of relief. Then she moved her hands back and forth in the air before nodding her head and speaking to me again.
"Phew… I forgot to cast the barrier. Anyway, it seems you have recognized my true identity as a dragon."
She looked at me with curious eyes.
How should I answer this?
Was she unable to remember that she had revealed herself to me as a dragon and emitted an air of superiority as soon as our hands touched? Her eyes looked so bright that I wondered if it was the eyes that had been glaring at me as if she were going to cut me out of the world just a moment ago.
While I was contemplating how to respond to her words, a strange and unfamiliar sensation, completely different from the feeling when I touched the dragon's hand just now, came from beyond the bookshelf. Her voice, which had been saying something to me, also stopped abruptly as if someone had pressed the pause button.
It was as if the "incongruity" that should not exist anywhere in the world itself, and the most unpleasant feeling I had ever experienced in my life, was palpable.
She, too, seemed to have felt the same sensation, as she stared beyond the bookshelf with a rigid expression.
As soon as I felt that sensation, I didn't have time to think about it as a mere thought. My body was already moving toward the source of that sensation, and my reinforced body pierced through the bookshelf.
In the midst of the unknown threat, there was only one thing on my mind.
Please, I hope nothing happened to her, that this ominous feeling I was feeling was my illusion.
But that was just a wish in my mind; my mind knows very well that reality doesn't always go as planned.
The anxiety that I had harbored in a corner of my heart soon became a reality for me.
There was nothing.
In the place where I arrived, there was nothing, not even Elena, who should have been quietly browsing through books, or anything that should have emitted that ominous aura as if its very existence were being erased from the world.
*Ahem.* i think this chapter is over react just for the plot i mean i get why he react like that but bruh...